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Guitarist Jokes


gardo

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I only know jokes about banjo players.

 

What's the difference between a banjo and a trampoline? You take your shoes of to jump on a trampoline.

 

How do you know if the stage is level? The banjo player drools out of both sides of his mouth.

 

What's the definition of perfect pitch? Throwing a banjo out the window and hitting an accordion player.

 

more to come...

 

What's the difference between a turtle run over in the road and a banjo player run over in the road?

 

There are skid marks in front of the turtle

 

What's the difference between a run over turtle and a run over banjo player?

 

The turtle was on his way to a gig

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Johnny wants to learn bass, so his mom drives him down to the music store where they meet Scott, the bass teacher. They agree on lessons every Wednesday at 3:00.

 

Week one; "Johnny, you see that big string on top? That's the E string, Hit it. Good. Practice that and I'll see you next Wednesday.

 

Week two: "Johnny, you see that string right under the E string? That's the A string. Hit it. Good. Practice that and I'll see you next week.

 

Next week Johnny doesn't show up.... 3:15.... 3:30.... Finally Scott calls Johnny's mom to see if Johnny is coming. "Oh," she said, "He joined a band and they are out on tour."

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Q: Why do scientists prefer to use guitar players over rats for drug experiments?

 

A: There some things you just can't get a rat to do.

 

"Daddy! I want to be a professional guitar player when I grow up!"

 

"You have to pick one or the other, son."

 

 

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