I smeared bacon fat on my strat now it stinks

[Highway_61]

When it was common for people to use greasy pomades (and I know some people still do), a quick run of the fingers through the hair or, even, across the forehead, was ample lubricant for fingers and/or strings that were too dry.

 

Lathering on animal grease is using a pneumatic hammer to nail a thumbtack.

[leopardstar]

I can't believe I just read this whole thread :~(

[littlemilo]

Send the neck to minitruth. He can fry pancakes on it 'til the grease is gone.

 

And the best part? mmmmmmmm...strato-pancakes!

['s mel gibson]

I can't believe I just read this whole thread :~(

 

ya mon!

[DaveAronow]

Here is a ridiculous story that I promise is 100% true.

 

I go camping all the time in the winter here in Florida, and I like to sit around the fire and strip bark of dried up vines to make walking sticks out of.

 

Not so much because I actually use the walking sticks, but just for something to do around the fire when I am not strumming a guitar.

 

Well, on night, I had just finished what I thought was the perfect specimen of a walking stick, A.K.A. fire stick, because most of them pretty quickly became the token fire poker, and I decided to do something special with this one.

 

I wanted to give it a nice oil finish sort of as my masterpiece of firesticks.

 

I realzed I had no cooking oil, or vegetable oil of any kind with me on that trip.

 

What could I use? Lets see, what have we got....

 

Green beens.... nope, that wont work,... M&M's, nope, no good there, beer, not wasting that,.....Cheetos,.....

 

CHEETOS!!!

 

Cheetos have oil in them dont they?

 

checks bag, YUP!! Says so right on the bag.

 

By that time the wheels were turning like a freight train, WAY too fast to have any hope of slowing it down.

 

I took Cheetos, they were the puffy kind by the way, and I rubbed them one at a time all over my masterpiece firestick, crushing the oil out of them and into the stick until I had used up pretty near a whole bag.

 

The masterpiece was complete.

 

A nice shiny stick with oil enhanced natural figure.

 

I was unbelivably proud. Like a child who smears fingerpiant in some unidentified form of.... we can call it art for a goof, and shows it to his parents, beaming as if he chanelled Michael Angelo through his four year old body, as the parents say, uh... um.... s..sure, I will hang it in the lobby at my office building.

 

It was simply The best stick I had EVER made, and lo and behold... It smelled good too.:love:

 

Anyway, I get home, we store all our gear in my buddies garage, and one stormy cold night, he left his outdoor dogs in the garage for warmth.

 

I came over the next day and he said he had some bad news.

 

His dog....... ATE.... my masterpiece firestick.:mad:

 

I was crushed.

 

I guess the Cheetos smell was just too overwhelming for Rover(not his real name) to resist.

 

I havent had the will or desire to make another stick since then.

 

I know I could never top that one.

 

True story.

[Brian Krashpad]

I saw what you did there.

[joecool1963]

drop tune the {censored}er and play shredded pork... work on your pork chops...

[cardude6987]

I'm very picky about my guitars, so I usually just cover myself in lard before I play.

 

 

I think this is sig worthy

[Into Nation]

Here is a ridiculous story that I promise is 100% true. I go camping all the time in the winter here in Florida, and I like to sit around the fire and strip bark of dried up vines to make walking sticks out of. Not so much because I actually use the walking sticks, but just for something to do around the fire when I am not strumming a guitar. Well, on night, I had just finished what I thought was the perfect specimen of a walking stick, A.K.A. fire stick, because most of them pretty quickly became the token fire poker, and I decided to do something special with this one. I wanted to give it a nice oil finish sort of as my masterpiece of firesticks. I realzed I had no cooking oil, or vegetable oil of any kind with me on that trip. What could I use? Lets see, what have we got.... Green beens.... nope, that wont work,... M&M's, nope, no good there, beer, not wasting that,.....Cheetos,..... CHEETOS!!! Cheetos have oil in them dont they? checks bag, YUP!! Says so right on the bag. By that time the wheels were turning like a freight train, WAY too fast to have any hope of slowing it down. I took Cheetos, they were the puffy kind by the way, and I rubbed them one at a time all over my masterpiece firestick, crushing the oil out of them and into the stick until I had used up pretty near a whole bag. The masterpiece was complete. A nice shiny stick with oil enhanced natural figure. I was unbelivably proud. Like a child who smears fingerpiant in some unidentified form of.... we can call it art for a goof, and shows it to his parents, beaming as if he chanelled Michael Angelo through his four year old body, as the parents say, uh... um.... s..sure, I will hang it in the lobby at my office building. It was simply The best stick I had EVER made, and lo and behold... It smelled good too. :love: Anyway, I get home, we store all our gear in my buddies garage, and one stormy cold night, he left his outdoor dogs in the garage for warmth. I came over the next day and he said he had some bad news. His dog....... ATE.... my masterpiece firestick. :mad: I was crushed. I guess the Cheetos smell was just too overwhelming for Rover(not his real name) to resist. I havent had the will or desire to make another stick since then. I know I could never top that one. True story.

I was waiting for the part where you stuck it back in the fire to seal the deal, and poof! Bummer though.

[jamdogg]

Why ppl put bacon grease on strats or put them in a hot trunk is beyond me.

[mercury-666]

+1

[Verence]

Hey, if nothing else the OP gets points in my book for using the phrase "Improvisational Elan".

I saw what you did there.

[GreaserMatt]

mmmm... bacon...

[Ratae Corieltauvorum]

If you want a real answer, get a bottle of either thyme, clove bud oil or rosemary (essential oil), pop a few drops between each fret and using your finger spread it round and then leave it and forget about it. All 3 are powerful antibiotics and will kill the bacteria causing the smell, make it smell nice, and if you use rosemary or thyme, will also clean and condition the fretboard..


NOW DON'T DO IT AGAIN:mad:

[duncan442]

Others on here who I'm sure have also baconed up an instrument or two would surely like your feedback.

That's going in the sig

[valentsgrif]

Behold, we have created a new verb : "baconed".

Years from now linguists will trace its origins back to here. Amazing.

[the Dust]

I perused the immediately available lubricants and, well, bacon fat is good for a bunch of other stuff

WTF???

[mikeSF]

don't be too hard on the OP. have any of you ever "seasoned" a new cast iron skillet or stove burners? this is where you slather vegetable shortening or some other product all over the iron surfaces and bake it in the oven for an hour so that the next time you use it, it will be a nice non-stick surface.

i really think the baconing of this fretboard was rather forward thinking and may represent the future of guitar care.

I can see it now...

(phone rings)

tech: yes, guitar repair works, may i help you?

caller: hi, uh how much is a set up?

tech: yes sir, it is $49 and includes new strings, action, intonation, truss rod adjustments, plus a complete baconing of all playing surfaces.

caller: great, i'll come at once...

(hangs up)

[Nomad000]

bahahaha

 

 

this is easily the funniest thread ever. Good stuff.

 

 

I wonder how the bacon affects the guitar's tone.... I reckon it makes it sound more... ... you probably get a beefier sound

[BASSDAD]

bahahaha this is easily the funniest thread ever. Good stuff. I wonder how the bacon affects the guitar's tone.... I reckon it makes it sound more... ... you probably get a beefier sound

Better than the what kind of bacon would satan eat? threads for sure:)

[Brewski]

nuff said

[waxbytes]

If you want a real answer, get a bottle of either thyme, clove bud oil or rosemary (essential oil), pop a few drops between each fret and using your finger spread it round and then leave it and forget about it. All 3 are powerful antibiotics and will kill the bacteria causing the smell, make it smell nice, and if you use rosemary or thyme, will also clean and condition the fretboard.. NOW DON'T DO IT AGAIN:mad:

But who wants to turn a strat into a folk guitar?

[sixthscale]

Bacon is awesome.

[YOUTUBE]ACRUAAh8ukQ[/YOUTUBE]

[Mrrikki]

bahahaha this is easily the funniest thread ever. Good stuff. I wonder how the bacon affects the guitar's tone.... I reckon it makes it sound more... ... you probably get a beefier sound

When using bacon many things alter the tone, is it plain bacon? smoked bacon? raw bacon? crispy bacon? etc so many different factors, and of course it changes from person to person depending what oil and size pan you use. And well if you microwave it...... you dont want to get me started!

[Brewski]

When using bacon many things alter the tone, is it plain bacon? smoked bacon? raw bacon? crispy bacon? etc so many different factors, and of course it changes from person to person depending what oil and size pan you use. And well if you microwave it...... you dont want to get me started!

 

 

funny