ot: life stuff

[R00PE]

like some guys mentionned... exercise or physical activities works good, also try to drink a lot of water. dehydratation can {censored} you up a lot more than you think

[Solcat]

Get out doors in the fresh air, walk in the park, play an outdoor sport. Join a sports team. Eat a little better, avoid processed food, sugar. Get a little excercise. Help someone out. Hang around positive people or kids. Maybe take a class in something; join a group. Get a dog, or walk someone else's.

[newbuilder]

It is a very good thing to come to the crossroads in one's self. It may not feel like it, but what you do now can be your new or real beginning. Take the deeper questions that you have about who you are and ask them over and over and really taste what it is about yourself that you don't like and why. Life is a journey and not everyone wakes up to the fact that they aren't what they want to be and have something inside that begs to be different. Search and discover what inside you is not ok with where you are.

[Woody_in_MN]

So I'm an old guy, I would say it is fairly normal to question your life at certain ages. Sometimes this happens when a parent passes on. I don't think there is anything wrong with seeing a professional. I have a few times. Sometimes an anti depressant can be helpful - but leave that too a professional.

 

Th other piece of this - which is a much larger question for the vast majority of society, is that they just feel empty. They have cool stuff, a job, a significant other, and still feel empty. That is a spiritual emptiness, and everyone needs to find their own path on that.

 

Secret weapon: Help someone. You will feel better.

 

Good luck to you.

[23miles]

Practice happy! Train yourself so that before you start to complain about something, name three good things about that thing. Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables and, above all, get plenty of sleep. Don't sweat the small stuff and make sure that you laugh, I mean really laugh, at least three times a day.

[mistersully]

help someone else... expect nothing in return

all the best to you

[Jkater]

Don't let your negative thoughts fool you. Easier said than done, I know, but this negative outlook doesn't define the truth of what's out there or what's within you. I love the advice of helping someone else or at least turn outwards and invest in something that isn't you, something you believe in. It comes back anyway and the rewards are there always. Living healthy physically (exercise and good food and relaxation) does wonder: I am just starting to realise that now that I am forced to do it. Why did I not start earlier? Good luck or, better said, make it happen!

[artiem]

To be honest, when I find myself feeling down it means I've been spending too much time thinking about me. I find I'm happiest when I'm being of service (usually some sort of physical work), when "me" is the last thing on my mind.

I agree with this 100%.

 

OP, I was in your situation a lot back in my 20s (40s now). Everyone's different, but I found that when I did things that I knew were right, I immediately felt better about myself. Try doing some little things: volunteer at an animal shelter, make some sandwiches and go hand them out to the homeless guys downtown, write your Mom or Dad a letter thanking them for raising you, and so forth. You'd be surprised what stuff like that can do for your self-esteem.

[Spike Li]

Theres a lot of great advice here, especially ArrowHeads, so all i got to add is this:

 

Dont be afraid to go outside of your comfort zone - doing so almost always works out for the best. Problems in you life may arise because you are too afraid change and thus fix the problem.

 

For example (and to bring this back on topic ), say you are a huge Gibson fanboy- you love them to death, own a stack of them yet your guitar playing feels like you are missing something... then try other things! It might turn out that Fenders were right for you all along, or even if they arent you can take confidence in the fact that you at least tried other things and can safely say that you are glad you stuck with Gibsons...

[Spike Li]

My own faith would likely offend 99% of the people here.

 

What are you like a devil worshiper or something?

[HELSTRUME]

Nobody likes who they are. Thats why we have drugs and alcohol.

[aenemated]

i'm pretty sure you're just not drinking enough. up the booze intake. life will improve.

[Steadfastly]

There are a number of articles in the link below that I have found helpful. Perhaps you may also. One positive thing that you are already doing is a self-examination and it appears to be an honest one. Many people never have the courage to do this during their whole lifetime, so that is a very positive thing. Continue in the same pattern and things cannot but help but get better. Regards, Steadfastly

 

http://www.watchtower.org/e/archives/index.htm#human_relations

[sk8centilli]

"For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand

and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you."

Isaiah 41:13

[Dr. Scottie C]

It's my bed time...and it's too late for me to be pro-found...so I will let the late great Jim Rohn do the talking....I went through a rough spot in my early 20's too......feeling just like you do..... luckily I found Jim Rohn..... his teachings can change your life.:

 

 

"Goals. There's no telling what you can do when you get inspired by them. There's no telling what you can do when you believe in them. There's no telling what will happen when you act upon them.

 

The major reason for setting a goal is for what it makes of you to accomplish it. What it makes of you will always be the far greater value than what you get.

 

Reasons come first. Answers come second.

 

There are two ways to face the future. One way is with apprehension; the other is with anticipation.

 

The guy says, "When you work where I work, by the time you get home it's late. You've got to have a bite to eat, watch a little TV, relax and get to bed. You can't sit up half the night planning, planning, planning." And he's the same guy who's behind on his car payment.

 

When the promise is clear, the price gets easy.

 

I find it fascinating that most people plan their vacation with better care than they do their lives. Perhaps that is because escape is easier than change.

 

If you go to work on your goals, your goals will go to work on you. If you go to work on your plan, your plan will go to work on you. Whatever good things we build, end up building us.

 

We all need lots of powerful long range goals to help us past the short-term obstacles.

 

We must be careful not to let our current appetites steal away any chance we might have for a future feast.

 

We all have two choices. We can make a living or we can design a life.

 

I found it easier to get rich than I did to make excuses."

 

-All quotes by Jim Rohn

[Jarick]

Short answer: see a physician (not a therapist) and talk to them about depression. It's really, really common, and there are good and mostly mild medications which can help you feel like yourself again until your body's chemistry catches back up. Don't waste months or years of your life dealing with untreated depression, and don't stress out about the word. You'll probably feel a LOT better within 2-3 weeks.

 

Long answer:

 

This is good advice:

 

 

1) Change what you can change 2) Learn to accept the things you cannot change.

 

 

A few years ago I came to the realization that most politics/religion/news/etc were pretty much meaningless in terms of MY life. I'm not talking about personal faith, I'm talking about debating whether or not such and such religion is good or bad or whatever. If you're stressing out about your life and choices, you can give yourself permission to not worry about them. For Buddhists, it's called meditation (letting what happens just happen). For Christians and other religions, it's prayer (asking for guidance and allowing God to direct you). Etc.

 

Personally, I was debating some meaningless crap, some politics I'm sure, and someone called me out and said that's why I was so unhappy, single, etc in my life. I got extremely pissed off and went on a long walk, and realized she was right. I was focusing so much on the negative, on things I couldn't change, and letting the good, real stuff in my life go by. I started reading a lot about the Bible, about God, and eventually did get on some meds (off and on). About a year later, I met my fiancee and we had a kid and things are generally pretty good.

 

But yeah, it sounds like you could really use some help in terms of medication and that will help you figure out your life as well.

[seven58]

Some good advice here. My thoughts, as a person that has gone through similar things is to realize it is common for self aware people to take an inventory and make changes. Though it can be unsettling, it makes you better. Two readings that was very valuable to me during that time was Ralph Waldo Emerson's Self Reliance (this is a ling to the essay), and the book, Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman.

 

 

A quote from Way of the Peaceful Warrior

"If you don

[ExiledCrow]

Lots of good advice already, but I'll add a few thoughts: The fact that you are thinking about it and talking about it are pretty good signs. But don't let thinking and talking about it become your life, get out of your own head once and a while.

 

Listen to your friends about THEIR problems, it'll help them and that always helps one feel better about oneself. And you'll find some problems are pretty universal, often I find the advice I give is advice I should follow too.

 

Find things that make you happy, god, whiskey, guitars, sex with skanky women, whatever it is, make sure your life allows you to do that and work everything else in around it. Because if you're not doing what makes you happy nothing else works.

[Arr0wHead]

 

"For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13

 

 

The teachings of Christ, Ghandi, Mohammed, buddah, Lavey, and many others can easily be applied in this situation and be quite useful. However, starting in with sheer blind faith as an answer is only going to help if the OP is completely lost, desperate, and stupid.

 

I'm not saying there's no good advice to be found in the bible, and that those familiar with it should refrain from giving such good advice. However, the bible ITSELF is not advice at all. It's an agenda. I actually took time in this thread to defend the faithful and their entitlement to respect. Don't make me regret it.