Members Davetopay Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 After nearly 10 years in my band, I might just say "{censored} it". I don't feel a NEED to do this anymore, the commute on Sunday morning is taxing(80 miles each way), in the genre I don't have much to say musically anymore, and there are other things I can put my money and efforts into at home. I think I just got old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LowWoods Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 If it's more burden than fun/profit, move on. I ain't mad atcha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sheik_Yerbouti Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 After nearly 10 years in my band, I might just say "{censored} it". I don't feel a NEED to do this anymore, the commute on Sunday morning is taxing(80 miles each way), in the genre I don't have much to say musically anymore, and there are other things I can put my money and efforts into at home. I think I just got old. Sounds more like you're just stuck in a rut and could use a break, followed by a change of musical scenery. Take a month or two off then see if you still feel the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Davetopay Posted October 12, 2008 Author Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 If it's more burden than fun/profit, move on. I ain't mad atcha! Yeah. But I feel like I have a responsibility to the rest of the band. I have told them that if the day comes where I need to leave I would like to see them go on, but they said that wouldn't feel right as I have written most of the material. I don't know....it feels like I am considering divorce...lol:facepalm: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LowWoods Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 Yeah. But I feel like I have a responsibility to the rest of the band. I have told them that if the day comes where I need to leave I would like to see them go on, but they said that wouldn't feel right as I have written most of the material.I don't know....it feels like I am considering divorce...lol:facepalm: If you are miserable you are just wasting your/their time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rushtallica Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 If the negatives outweigh the benefits, as the other poster mentioned it sounds like it's time to go. You only live once; why keep doing something that takes more effor than it's worth to you if you feel you're wasting your time and effort? It sounds like you need a change of scenery, though only you know exactly what all's involved and if you really want something different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Slaymoar Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 Yeah. But I feel like I have a responsibility to the rest of the band. I have told them that if the day comes where I need to leave I would like to see them go on, but they said that wouldn't feel right as I have written most of the material.I don't know....it feels like I am considering divorce...lol:facepalm: Dude, your better off moving on if theres no mojo in the playing. Its better for them, they need to start doing their own {censored} too. I say sit down and tell them face to face. Tell them what you stated in the first post. Straightforward wins. {censored} emo {censored}. But that said, being considerate and respectful while doing it. Take care of your home dude, then start fresh with whatever you like. -D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members knucklefux Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 what you need is some perspective. when this band started, was there a goal? why was the band formed? for instance, if the goal was to "make it" and you haven't after 10 years, odds are that it's not going to happen. then again, if you give up now, the goal can NEVER be reached. also, if the genre is the problem, start writing stuff that you'd rather do. maybe the rest of the band will dig it. lastly, if you'll link the band's myspace page, we'll tell you if you should keep doing it or not:lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rameumptom Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 How old are you anyway!? I go through the same thing once in a while. I've been in my band for 10 years, written most of the material and sometimes I just get burnt out. When we started out 10 years ago we wanted to write good music and maybe have a chance at doing something with it. Now, we're still writing music we love and our goals have simplified to just playing local shows and having fun with it. We're all older, in our 30's, and we each have families now, but it's still fun to get together, write and play. I would listen to the advise of the other posters. You may regret quitting and may not find a group that you enjoy playing with or that is as even as good as your current line up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Oblivion DC Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 what you need is some perspective. when this band started, was there a goal? why was the band formed? for instance, if the goal was to "make it" and you haven't after 10 years, odds are that it's not going to happen. then again, if you give up now, the goal can NEVER be reached. also, if the genre is the problem, start writing stuff that you'd rather do. maybe the rest of the band will dig it. lastly, if you'll link the band's myspace page, we'll tell you if you should keep doing it or notThis.But also, if you do quit, don't go out and sell all your gear just yet. Sit on it for a while and maybe in a few months you'll feel differently about playing again. If you find you still don't feel like playing anymore you could sell it then and probably never look back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members charveldan Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 Yeah. But I feel like I have a responsibility to the rest of the band. I have told them that if the day comes where I need to leave I would like to see them go on, but they said that wouldn't feel right as I have written most of the material. I don't know....it feels like I am considering divorce...lol:facepalm: Pay attention to your gut instinct, there is something telling you to do what it is that your doing, you may regret it later if you don't. As far as the band, be honest and frank about where you stand in the band, they may not agree totally with your decision, but will respect you in the long run. There will always be new opportunities down the road if you change your mind. Be good to yourself ,no one else will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LocalRV Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 Take some time off and just relax. If after your break you are still not happy, then move on. Life is too short to not enjoy it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TheEsupremacy Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 That pretty much covers everything, relationships, bands, jobs ect..... If it's stale you need to move on, life is short. Never forget that. Right on D-Rock! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mrelusive Posted October 12, 2008 Members Share Posted October 12, 2008 80 miles each way? i don't think i could do that. To play a show, yeah. But every sunday for practice? Taxing is a good word. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Davetopay Posted October 13, 2008 Author Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 For those that want to check us out.... www.myspace.com/helltopaybaltimore It's just old school hardcore, plain and simple. It's nothing revolutionary, but I am no guitar wizard, that's for sure. The band started from the ashes of another band I had started with our drummer back in the 90's (www.myspace.com/dayslostvahc) and we just wanted to have fun and get to play shows. There were never dreams of "making it". We knew better than to expect to make a living out of the genre. Some of the time it has been amazing, others saddening, and others down right frightening and dangerous. At the age of 33, I have to wonder if maybe I just don't belong in the "scene" anymore. Some of us have been involved with some very influential bands and are down right talented. Our drummer was the founder of Darkest Hour, has played with Wake Up Cold, Harsh Truth, First Offense, Soap Hammer, and tons of others as a hired gun. Our fomer 2nd guitar was the bassist for Next Step Up, Harsh Truth and has played both bass and guitar in a gaggle of other bands. The same goes for our other members. We all grew up together and are truly the best of friends, but I worry that if I were to call it quits we would lose touch and it would all end. I guess it's because these are the only true friends, aside from my fiance', that I really have. We have been writing new material as of late, but still I am not sure if I have something to say, or to prove to myself. SIGH. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JimAnsell Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 i've thought about quitting my band while i'm still fairly young and not completely discouraged.my career is kind of taking center stage in my life, and on a good week i get to spend maybe 5-6 hours with my band, who are also probably my 3 closest friends besides my wife. its a labor of love, and if the love isn't there anymore, you gotta do what you gotta do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DET1973 Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 no matter what you choose to do dave, i think your band kicks major ass. I'm a hardcore fan still at the age of 35. i feel your pain at times then something draws me back in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members slideroni Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 You guys are good, within your genre. As one gets older, often one gets less angry, and more interested in melody and nuance. I think a player of your caliber has a lot of options. If they are truly your bro's, they'll understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Johnny Z Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 Sometimes you just need a break and some time to do something else. I quit a band once after 4 years. Wasn't because we weren't getting along, we were all good friends and we were making plenty of money, I just got tired of the travel and the same old grind. Cashed out of the band and bought a small place in the country, went back to college and built my own home. I'm glad I did it when I did, it would be harder to do now. I still play music in local bands but only when I want and play what I want. The money isn't as good, I don't care, but I'm not on the road 9 months out of the year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Cap'n Ahole Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 Fuuuuuuck... 80 miles each way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members SloanStewart Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 Dude, if you've been at it 10 years, stick with it for at least 5 more. There will be a {censored}ing genre revival and reunions all over the {censored}ing place and you'll get some sweetass hookups. If you feel like you have nothing to say, then say something about having nothing to say and the {censored}ing rock and hard place you feel like your in right now. Get in there and don't just {censored} {censored} up, {censored} {censored} up real good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HKSblade1 Posted October 13, 2008 Members Share Posted October 13, 2008 Find a new band. Closer to you for commuting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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