Members burdizzos Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Do any of you actually have to tell band members that they shouldn't fart while playing? It seems like it should be an unspoken rule that should never be mentioned. I've had the misfortune of playing with two guys that thought it was both hilarious and cool to fart while playing. For starters, it's just {censored}ing rude and disrespectful to the band, especially the drummer because he can't go wireless and escape. Secondly, it seems horribly unprofessional because there's a good chance that will drift off stage or worse, someone could come up on stage to make a request only to be hit in the face with a wall of {censored}. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Xuf Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 ROFL!!! Yeah I never really thought about it but that's so true, it's loud up there so no one will hear it, but they will smell it hehe ... I don't see a problem with it and if anyone of my bandmates complained I'd just laugh at them cuz its really not a big deal, c'mon its just a fart dude! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members vladoicho Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Not as such. However, we've agreed that there should be no open flames on stage to minimize the chance of fireballs... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Do any of you actually have to tell band members that they shouldn't fart while playing?It seems like it should be an unspoken rule that should never be mentioned.I've had the misfortune of playing with two guys that thought it was both hilarious and cool to fart while playing. For starters, it's just {censored}ing rude and disrespectful to the band, especially the drummer because he can't go wireless and escape. Secondly, it seems horribly unprofessional because there's a good chance that will drift off stage or worse, someone could come up on stage to make a request only to be hit in the face with a wall of {censored}. LOL first and foremost. I dont know about cool but farts are funny... how small is the stage you are playing on that this is an issue. Have you ever smelled an audience......not exactly the cleanest group of people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RockStringBendr Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Reminds me of our drummer. When we met him about 7-8 years ago he musta been on some weirdo freak diet or sumthin cuz he cleared the studio out about 3 times outta 4 for the 1st couple of months and at the 1st gig he melted everyone's face in the 1st 2 rows during our opening set. I LMAO thinking about it now (and I will remind and trash him about it later) but that night I was mortified. Some chick actually shouted out WTF crawled up in you guyz and died? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members james on bass Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 My God, the singer let one out last night that just killed us on stage. I thought someone had {censored} right on stage! And a very small corner stage to boot. A couple weeks ago we were playing a regular show. There were 3 very cute girls dancing/playing pool near the stage. All of a sudden it smelled like someone had died. The guitarist looked at me, I looked at him... we looked off stage and all 3 girls were laughing, though one was laughing out of embarrassment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Kaesh Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 If someone in my band made an issue out of farting on stage I'd promptly instruct him to remove the broomstick firmly lodged in his anus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members burdizzos Posted May 17, 2009 Author Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Farts are only funny when you can hear them. Without the sound, it's just nasty. I play bars which means the biggest "stage" I routinely see is 10x20. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Chlo_treacher Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 If someone in my band made an issue out of farting on stage I'd promptly instruct him to remove the broomstick firmly lodged in his anus. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!:lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dDigitalPimp Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 our old rhythm guitarist used to fart at least three times a practice and those {censored}ers stunk bad and stuck around for a solid 2 or 3 minutes. if i had to fart id fart on stage. i doubt anyone else would notice because im not going to pick one leg up and make a face while doing it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Les_Izzmor Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 There are times I try and eat some nasty foods just so I can stroll back to the drummer, let one loose, and go back to the front of the stage. I think it's funny as {censored}. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members db. Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Just let 'em rip. The show must go on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MisfitKay138 Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 dont know, havent been on stage yet, but im thinking i know how to keep the asshats in the crowd from hitting on me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Billystrat Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 I'd need a stage plot with dimensions and personal positions to write up a John Madden playbook on the matter. Practices in a small acoustically treated room or recording studio = NOT COOL Live well it all depends, I mean do you think you'll get asked back if you guys are wincing in pain from clenching your butt the whole set? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members perrydabassman Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 dont know, havent been on stage yet, but im thinking i know how to keep the asshats in the crowd from hitting on me What was your name again sweety? rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sugarskull Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 I have at times encouraged my band mates to have a pre-show "sitdown" if you will. Going potty before you play is always a good idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Crescent Seven Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 I drop neutron bombs at all times. I figure if they won't kiss my ass, the least they can do is smell it. I dropped a McDonald's Double QP bomb on the band once in rehearsal. The drummer actually came over the front of the drumset to get out of the room. It was pretty rad.C7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BigPigPeaches Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 The day that this is NOT funny, they can stick my dead body in the cold cold ground. In some cases I will make a mid-afternoon run to Burger King for a large order of onion rings, just for fuel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members toolbar Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 i think it's childish and rude, and since i'm not anal retentive, also funny. I usually try to give everyone a 'heads up' - after the fact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members samson3382 Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 If i don't let it go at the moment it makes itself known, theres a good chance it could crawl back up inside and hang out for a long time, causing some sever pain and discomfort. Being the singer, i don't want that pressure inside messing with my diaphragm, right? so i have no choice but to let it rip. Of course there is always the risk of follow through...thats whole nother thread... I think i have smelled crowds that were probably worse than i could ever be.Practice is a different story, see we practice in the bottom story of a converted cold war era bomb shelter. Awsome if you want to go turn all the way up and practice @ 3:30 on a tuesday morning, but if you have four or five guys in there just breathing, or just a little B.O., it can get gnarly fast. let alone if someone is lettin em rip. its funny too how your nose can adjust, we don't notice the stuffy smell, and someone walks into the room and chokes. I usually show up after the other band we share with has been practicing for two hours, it feels like all the air has been sucked out of the room. the first thing i always do is go straight to the fan (i brought down there) and put it on high. i used to buy air fresheners but someone was complaining about how the place smelled like a strip club. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DevilRaysFan Posted May 17, 2009 Members Share Posted May 17, 2009 Farts are only funny when you can hear them. Without the sound, it's just nasty.I play bars which means the biggest "stage" I routinely see is 10x20. So not true..... Farts are wonderful especially when you bring a small fan and turn it towards the stationary drummer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bassred Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 I sing a lot of songs in D and G. I have quite a few high notes to get out. I can't help it if my diaphramal contractions might shake a little of the hot stuff past the breaking point.... It has only been an issue like one (or two) times... the air flow seemed to keep it all in the up stage-right corner... poor guitar player.... As long as its not intentional, I think it;s fine, sh*t happens. Well, let's hope in this case it doesn't.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members samson3382 Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 As long as its not intentional, I think it;s fine, sh*t happens. Well, let's hope in this case it doesn't.. :thu:Its a fine line between a fart and a shart, until you cross it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JeffBass Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 I think it;s fine, sh*t happens.. That's exactly why it happens. Not enough roughage! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 I drop neutron bombs at all times. I figure if they won't kiss my ass, the least they can do is smell it.I dropped a McDonald's Double QP bomb on the band once in rehearsal. The drummer actually came over the front of the drumset to get out of the room. It was pretty rad.C7 LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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