Members Emprov Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 I'll fart anywhere, anytime. I've farted at gigs, before gigs, after gigs. I've farted in church, weddings, funerals, hospital rooms. But the ONLY place I've ever regretted, or tried to hold it until I could escape, is our practice room. It is an air tight prison cell, and TORTURE once someone drops a bomb in there. It never leaves. No air movement, crap ventilation, torture. I used to be in a sitch like that twice a week. In the summer we'd put a bunch of fans in there. Whenever someone ripped one, it'd make it's way around the room in no time flat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted May 18, 2009 Members Share Posted May 18, 2009 Right. Somehow, most people manage not to fart in church or at job interviews without exploding.There's a difference between letting one slip and purposely squeezing one out because you think it's funny. I was in Church one morning and there was a guest Pastor. During his sermon he stated, "Preaching has been in my family for 200 years" as he paused for the next sentance my Friend and fellow Usher ripped the loudest damn fart I ever heard and the wood pew actually helped the reverberation! his next sentance, without missing a beat was "while some people maynot believe me"...LOL After the service my firends mother grabbed him by the ear and dragged him into a private room..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wades_keys Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 I was in Church one morning and there was a guest Pastor. During his sermon he stated, "Preaching has been in my family for 200 years" as he paused for the next sentance my Friend and fellow Usher ripped the loudest damn fart I ever heard and the wood pew actually helped the reverberation! his next sentance, without missing a beat was "while some people maynot believe me"...LOL After the service my firends mother grabbed him by the ear and dragged him into a private room..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Xuf Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 DH= Designated Hitter OP= Orange Prostate What the F is a WTF? lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ikestr Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 this is the funniest post i have ever read...im crying from the laughter. yes, we have all been there and done that, even i let one rip from time to time. the tears are pouring down my face as i write this. i will say that bryan and ric have some damned funny stories. ikestr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 this is the funniest post i have ever read...im crying from the laughter. yes, we have all been there and done that, even i let one rip from time to time. the tears are pouring down my face as i write this. i will say that bryan and ric have some damned funny stories.ikestr Dude, you dont even know..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Zeromus-X Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 {censored} all of you. Right in the face. /drummer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members KsE fan Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 I once pulled a drive by on a band, I was front row at the show (waiting for the band after them) and they sucked so I got up on stage and stage dove (like everyone else was doing) except when I got on stage I let out a hugeeeeee fart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wades_keys Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 I do. The trick is to let it slip very cautiously, being sure not to generate any unwanted sounds. C'mon, church can go on for more than an hour, and holding in your farts is not healthy - that's a fact, Jack. Back in high school, I let one of the most embarassing rip's in my life trying to do that. When it did break free, it was like a tortured shriek: the whole class burst into laughter and I got sent to detention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members perrydabassman Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 I was in Church one morning and there was a guest Pastor. During his sermon he stated, "Preaching has been in my family for 200 years" as he paused for the next sentance my Friend and fellow Usher ripped the loudest damn fart I ever heard and the wood pew actually helped the reverberation! his next sentance, without missing a beat was "while some people maynot believe me"...LOL After the service my firends mother grabbed him by the ear and dragged him into a private room..... Where was this? Our lady of the Flapping Anus? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members burdizzos Posted May 19, 2009 Author Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 {censored} all of you. Right in the face./drummer I'm on your side. I knew it was going to be a bad night when I saw the plate of broccoli arrive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Flogger59 Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 Last weekend: A cold rainy night at the lake. The Bluegrass jam got moved into a trailer, 12 people in a 10 x 10 space, 155lb Rottweiler on the floor in the middle of it all. At first his ass was pointed away from me, and I wondered about the tortured faces and retching sounds from across the room. I soon found out. Someone has to change that dog's diet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bluescout Posted May 19, 2009 Members Share Posted May 19, 2009 Big fart + Captive Audience = FUNNY It's simple math. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.