Sending out an email to my band with my concerns

[-MBro-]

Im hoping that they wont think Im a total asshole. How would you express this differently? Im not the leader of the band though Im usually the one to conduct the rehearsals.

 

Heres the email

 

Hi all,

 

Ive been monitoring all of the business discussions. I appreciate everything that has been done so far especially since I have ( except for a few occasions) rarely been the one to hunt gigs.

It is rare that a band is so complete, with our strong musical abilities and expertise in other areas I believe that we will be a top cover band eventually.

Its just a matter of how soon depending on our level of commitment to all areas.

 

 

When I think about the really great cover bands that Ive seen I only seem to recall 2 things:

1. how entertaining the show was

2. how well the musicians played.

Of course this is coming from a musician perspective but I think that more or less it is the

impression that is left with an audience and determines if they will come out to see us again.

 

 

Since we're a relatively new band, giving more attention to the music makes the most sense to me. Mainly being prepared for practice and getting to work during practice.

Instead of using a portion of our limited studiotime discussing matters, we should go for coffee or a bite before or after.

For me, I can usually find one or two times a week to practice the the bands material. My one day of practice usually lands the evening before or the morning of our rehearsal.

If a band member can't have there parts ready it would be great to let everyone know. Too many time have I arrived at a rehersal having put the majority of time on a new song to find out no

one else has( it happens in most bands Ive been in but not all). This is frustrating for those who did practice and discouraging for everybody. Learning a song from scatch during our practice isnt productive use of our time.

What ever direction we take this band I know that its gonna be fun. Even with my few gumblings expressed here, I honestly can say that I thoroughly enjoy being part of retro-spex.

 

Mike

 

 

http://www.facebook.com/retrospexband

 

http://www.reverbnation.com/retrospexband

[BlueStrat]

Sounds good to me. Too many bands don't know the difference between practice and rehearsal.

[tim_7string]

It looks pretty good and it's phrased nicely rather than "I'm quitting unless you f***ers start learning the g**damn songs!"

 

However, I would modify this part:

 

"I know all the song pretty well or at least have good notes so feel free give me a call or email. I can also send out mp3's of any of our songs if they are needed just ask."

 

It sounds slightly condescending, as if you are the only one who knows how to play music. Whether this is true or not, people don't like to be told they are inferior to someone else, be it in musical competency or mental prowess (just another example).

 

Instead, you could offer to start sending out mp3s starting with this e-mail to everyone, with a timeline of when the band should have those particular songs down. Sending 1-2 at at time should work to start with. I suggested sending mp3s to my bandmates before, but the drummer insisted he already has the songs or can download them himself. I have sent the bass player an mp3 before and it sounded like he worked on it at the very next band rehearsal, so that was a positive thing. Some people will take matters into their own hands, while others need that little extra push. Sending the mp3 to those members makes it clear that this is the song to be concerned about at this moment.

 

Otherwise, pretty good job.

[jimiv]

I think this is a common problem with cover bands. The good ones don't waste rehearsal time practing new songs. If you are in a band where everyone has equal say over direction, then you need to have a majority of players who won't use rehearsal as practice. Without that peer pressure, you will never get everyone on board and the nonsense will continue. In our situation, rehearsal time is sacred. It is usually apparent very quickly when a player doesn't have a part down and the rest of us will just move on to the next song. The offending player gets the drift very quickly. It rarely happens now, in that if someone doesn't have their parts down, they so state before rehearsal so the band's time is not wasted. Now, on the other hand, bands who have a band leader making all decisions etc., it becomes rather easy to fix that problem.

[-MBro-]

Unfortunatly I have been the one sending out mp3s and youtube links. They just havent been used or at least that is the excuse. I read through 20 emails over 4 day dicussing a 16 song set list and the drummer doesnt want to play a song because it was a wreck last time we played. He asks if anyone one can explain the songs ending without thinking to much about it. I could answer his question quite easily but Im not sure thats what hes looking for. It seems hes just looking for us to comply to his request.

[rangefinder]

OP, I'd have to wonder why your email is so long. If the underlying issue is "rehearsal is not practice" you should be able to get that across very easily and concisely.

 

eg

"Dudes, I have a concern about rehearsals. Sometimes people don't have their parts down cold, and we end up wasting time. Can we agree that everyone needs to come to rehearsal with their parts already learned?"

 

If they agree, then HOW they do it really isn't your concern. They should really be self-sufficient, and if not, you can address that with each band member individually (sending mp3s and such).

[wades_keys]

I'm trying to get my drummer to understand that if we are going to rehearse more (or at all), then we ALL need to have our heads in the game and keep mental note of specific parts that aren't gelling properly.

 

This way, we can rehearse intelligently, with goals, rather than just plowing through a bunch of tunes.

 

I've found that taking the time to identify problem spots and letting the other guys know about it pays dividends. Bands too often don't do that: they don't have the "musical director" role defined, and what happens is you get general complaints along the lines of "our endings aren't tight enough" or "we need to rehearse".

 

My answer to both of those questions has been: "which ending specifically? WE don't screw up ALL of our endings, or even 20% of them, so please be more specific"

"Why exactly do we need to rehearse? What is the goal?"

 

And I would expect a more concise answer than "to get tighter": that's a copout. If the "complainers" put as much effort into formulating their complaint as they do into complaining itself, a lot more productive stuff would happen.

[-MBro-]

I like to offer possible solutions to the problems I address. Everyone in the band is very experienced. Ages range from 32 - 50 something I am the young guy at 34. They know about musicianship but have just gotten complacent.

[-MBro-]

 

I'm trying to get my drummer to understand that if we are going to rehearse more (or at all), then we ALL need to have our heads in the game and keep mental note of specific parts that aren't gelling properly. This way, we can rehearse intelligently, with goals, rather than just plowing through a bunch of tunes. I've found that taking the time to identify problem spots and letting the other guys know about it pays dividends. Bands too often don't do that: they don't have the "musical director" role defined, and what happens is you get general complaints along the lines of "our endings aren't tight enough" or "we need to rehearse". My answer to both of those questions has been: "which ending specifically? WE don't screw up ALL of our endings, or even 20% of them, so please be more specific" "Why exactly do we need to rehearse? What is the goal?" And I would expect a more concise answer than "to get tighter": that's a copout. If the "complainers" put as much effort into formulating their complaint as they do into complaining itself, a lot more productive stuff would happen.

 

 

As self appointed musical directer I reflect on each of our song after performances and before rehearsal and write down any problem spots. And arrive at each rehearsal with an agenda. However it often gets sidetracked.

[Chicken Monkey]

The longer an email, the more ranty it seems. It sounds like there's two issues:

 

Can we focus on playing during our studio time, and get coffee or something afterwards to run through non-musical concerns?

 

Can we give eachother a heads-up ASAP if we're not going to be able to pull off a song that week?

 

I'd get to the point.

[TIMKEYS]

 

Im hoping that they wont think Im a total asshole. How would you express this differently? Im not the leader of the band though Im usually the one to conduct the rehearsals. Heres the email Hi all, Ive been monitoring all of the business discussions. I appreciate everything that has been done so far especially since I have ( except for a few occasions) rarely been the one to hunt gigs. Its great that the band has great talents for all the other aspects of needed to get a band going, most notably on the business, organisation and technical side. It is rare that a band is so complete along with with our strong musical abilities. I believe that we will be a top cover band eventually. Its just a matter of how soon depending on our level of commitment to all areas. When I think about the really great cover bands that Ive seen I only seem to recall 2 things: 1. how entertaining the show was 2. how well the musicians played. Of course this coming from a musician perspective but I think that more or less it is the impression that is left with an audience and determines if they will come out to see us again. Since we a still a relatively new band and giving more attention to the music, at this point it makes the most sense to me. Mainly being prepared for practice and getting to work during practice. Instead of using a portion of our limited studiotime discussing matters, we can go for coffee or a bite before or after. If you're unsure about a song ask someone and please dont leave it till when its too late. I know all the song pretty well or at least have good notes so feel free give me a call or email. I can also send out mp3's of any of our songs if they are needed, just ask. For me I can usually find one or two times a week to practice the the bands material. My one day of practice usually lands the evening before or the morning of our rehearsal. If a band member can't have there parts ready it would be great to let everyone know. Too many time have I arrived at a band practice havening put the majority of time on a new song to find out no one else has( it happens in most bands Ive been in but not all). This is frustrating for those who did practice and discouraging for everybody. Learning a song from scatch during our practice isnt productive use of our time. What ever direction we take this band I know that its gonna be fun. Even with my few gumblings expressed here, I honestly can say that I thoroughly enjoy being part of retro-spex. Mike http://www.facebook.com/retrospexband http://www.reverbnation.com/retrospexband

 

 

 

 

good message ,, however you used " I " way too many times from a communications point of view. Stuff like this always reads alot better when you use WE instead of I.

[-MBro-]

I will label it as a rant then

[wades_keys]

 

As self appointed musical directer I reflect on each of our song after performances and before rehearsal and write down any problem spots. And arrive at each rehearsal with an agenda. However it often gets sidetracked.

 

I try and do the same thing, less so lately as I've got some life issues to work through right now.

 

But like Tim said, it does help to try and keep it a "we" thing.

 

Also it really helps to use praise too; don't let them see you as just the nitpicky critic of all things that aren't right.

 

Do you record rehearsals? I do, and since I own the recorder and operate it, this puts me in the unique position of being the "front line" guy that hears everything, both right and wrong.

[-MBro-]

Im sitting on this email at the moment as it will be a follow up to me calling everyone about the matter. I like the peer presure idea that jimiv stated. I need to get like minded band members on board with me.

I went through it and managed to take out one I.

[-MBro-]

I have a portable recorder. I'll use it for rehearsal and performance in the future. Great idea!

[ski219]

Rather than emailing, consider a "band meeting" at your next practice. I find emails give people a chance to stew about things too long. Then when you finally talk about it you are often defusing unnecessary conflicts. Have a meeting and everyone gets a chance to talk about their issues and come to a resolution.

[Vito Corleone]

+1 on the comments about making it less "I" and more "we" in the wording.

[BlueStrat]

 

Rather than emailing, consider a "band meeting" at your next practice. I find emails give people a chance to stew about things too long. Then when you finally talk about it you are often defusing unnecessary conflicts. Have a meeting and everyone gets a chance to talk about their issues and come to a resolution.

 

 

I disagree. Putting things in writing help me to keep my thoughts organised, edit what I want to say before anyone hears it, and doesn't allow for the subject to be changed or extraneous topics to be introduced into the conversation.

 

I fired a guy in my band via email. He didn't like it, but he's one of those guys who is a verbal bulldozer and won't listen when you're talking to him, interrupts constantly, and tries to take the conversation into other directions. For instance, every time we'd discuss business at the band rehearsals after we were done playing, he'd launch about how nobody is paying, there's no money in it, anyone who expects to get paid today is delusional, why aren't we playing just to get out in public, it's all the economy and all because of rich fatcat bankers and corporate greed, Republicans are killing us, etc etc etc-all in about two minutes. The guy was a huge guy (6-5 and 285) and would literally filibuster to where you couldn't get a word in edgewise. I wasn't about to have that when I cut him loose, and I just find it easier to have everything in writing so there's no " I thought you said X" or "That's not what you said before".

[jwlussow]

 

Sounds good to me. Too many bands don't know the difference between practice and rehearsal.

 

 

Too true. I still argue with people that think they are the same thing.

[ski219]

 

I disagree. Putting things in writing help me to keep my thoughts organised, edit what I want to say before anyone hears it, and doesn't allow for the subject to be changed or extraneous topics to be introduced into the conversation. I fired a guy in my band via email. He didn't like it, but he's one of those guys who is a verbal bulldozer and won't listen when you're talking to him, interrupts constantly, and tries to take the conversation into other directions. For instance, every time we'd discuss business at the band rehearsals after we were done playing, he'd launch about how nobody is paying, there's no money in it, anyone who expects to get paid today is delusional, why aren't we playing just to get out in public, it's all the economy and all because of rich fatcat bankers and corporate greed, Republicans are killing us, etc etc etc-all in about two minutes. The guy was a huge guy (6-5 and 285) and would literally filibuster to where you couldn't get a word in edgewise. I wasn't about to have that when I cut him loose, and I just find it easier to have everything in writing so there's no " I thought you said X" or "That's not what you said before".

 

 

I've seen things fester on email too many times. One of our band members is a lawyer and when we have "discussions" he does a terrific job of keeping things focused, diffusing any contentious conflicts and building a consensus.

[wades_keys]

 

I've seen things fester on email too many times. One of our band members is a lawyer and when we have "discussions" he does a terrific job of keeping things focused, diffusing any contentious conflicts and building a consensus.

 

I have too.

 

But that's the way it needs to be as far as I'm concerned.

 

If a bandmate can't handle the truth as presented, then what kind of bandmate is he anyway?

 

I'm not going to walk on eggshells to try and avoid conflict. Conflict avoidance is a jive philosophy that doesn't work well anyway. What you do is you work towards conflict resolution.

 

I'm not interested in working with people who get all butt-hurt over the littlest thing, and who have no experience in resolving conflict. The best performing teams in corporations are the ones that resolve conflicts, not the ones that avoid them.

[SpaceNorman]

 

I'm not going to walk on eggshells to try and avoid conflict. Conflict avoidance is a jive philosophy that doesn't work well anyway. What you do is you work towards conflict resolution. I'm not interested in working with people who get all butt-hurt over the littlest thing, and who have no experience in resolving conflict. The best performing teams in corporations are the ones that resolve conflicts, not the ones that avoid them.

 

 

Sidestepping dialogue simply to avoid conflict is a recipe for disaster. However, discussing things in a manner that minimizes misunderstanding and unintended interpretations is wise. Email (like posts on this forum) are simply the printed word - and provide the sender ZERO feedback regarding how the recipient of the message is taking it in - and in doing so gives the sender no chance to adjust to maximize the effectiveness of his delivery. I doubt there is forum member who regularly posts on here that can't recall a post of theirs that was interpreted by another forum member in a way that was radically different than what the they intended. Email (and forum posts) can be funny that way.

 

You're right in that the best performing teams in corporations are the ones that resolve conflicts - however, that isn't the whole story. The best performing teams are also careful to ensure that the message their audience receives is in fact the one they intended to send.

 

Email serves best to communicate facts, confirm commitments and deal with housekeeping details, etc. When serious dialogue and understanding is the goal - the most effective communicators usually opt for face to face discussions if at all possible.

 

If I were in the OP's shoes - my note would say something along the line of ...."I'm concerned that our rehearsals aren't as productive as they could be. I've been giving alot of though to this lately - and would like spend a few minutes at the beginning (or) end of our next rehearsal to see if we can come up with some ideas on how to improve them." I'd then be walking into that discussion with my ducks in a row - with examples of the time wasters that are bugging me - and a specific list of actions to propose that I think will improve the situation.

 

Just my .02 on this one....

[BlueStrat]

I've seen things fester on email too many times. One of our band members is a lawyer and when we have "discussions" he does a terrific job of keeping things focused, diffusing any contentious conflicts and building a consensus.

 

That's great. I'd bet most bands don't have lawyers in them, though, and a written record of conversations is the best way to remove all doubt about who said what. YMMV. And for what it's worth, I've seen far more problems arise from band meetings when A was said and someone heard B and took it personally. Especially when that person likes to interrupt, change the subject no matter how hard you try to keep it focused, talks over everyone else and likes to drink about 4 pints of beer at every rehearsal.

[SpaceNorman]

That's great. I'd bet most bands don't have lawyers in them, though, and a written record of conversations is the best way to remove all doubt about who said what. YMMV. And for what it's worth, I've seen far more problems arise from band meetings when A was said and someone heard B and took it personally. Especially when that person likes to interrupt, change the subject no matter how hard you try to keep it focused, talks over everyone else and likes to drink about 4 pints of beer at every rehearsal.

 

Any band that needs to check the transcripts to stay on track is already doomed.

 

It's all about using the right tool for the job. In my experience, I've found that guys that interrupt, refuse to stay on the topic at hand, shouts down the rest of the band while drinking a half gallon of beer ... usually pay zero attention to well worded emails. On the couple of occasions - I've run into that guy - I reach for the proverbial 2x4. I ask to speak to him one on one - and use that opportunity to explain that such behavior isn't acceptable in the group. I then make it clear that if it continues I'll have no choice but to use my influence as a "hitter" (stolen from another thread today...) and see to it that he's sent packing. If that behavior continues - I stay true to my word. Knowing that the rest of my bandmates won't tolerate it either makes it an easy fix.

 

Just saying ....

[GCDEF]

The grammar nazi in me says

 

The experienced band member in me says, never ever as in never send out an email like this. It will never ever as in never be received in the spirit it's intended. Never.

 

Just talk about it at rehearsal.