Members mstreck Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 So after a relatively successful weekend gig, we were all ready to start rehearsing new songs and improve a few things with our show at practice on Monday. Well, around 6AM Monday morning I got a text from a band member saying he couldn't do practice because he had to take his wife's car to her parents to get fixed that evening. Ok, that's valid, right - she has to be able to get to work, right? Maybe the brakes need changed or something else that shouldn't wait for safety reasons or whatever. Right? Well, one band member has class on Tuesday and Thursday evenings, so Wednesday was our only other option. Another band member already had a dinner scheduled with his parents for Wednesday but said he would cancel if it was absolutely necessary. I didn't want to be the guy who couldn't come through for his bandmates, so I asked my coworkers to move a meeting from Wednesday to Monday so I would be able to get out of work on time that day. Six people were able to make the change (some rescheduled babysitters) and we could meet without the one person that couldn't switch - I love my coworkers. Great - now we were all set to be able to rehearse on Wednesday. I didn't know what was wrong with the car, but I texted him after I got home Monday evening to tell him that he could use my truck in case it couldn't be fixed right away. No response. So I texted his wife to tell her the same thing. She answered LOL saying it just needed an oil change. I told her I was under the impression that it was more important because her husband canceled practice for it. She said he never mentioned practice - but she works late so she's not really affected by that anyhow. Then... the band member who was going to reschedule with his parents told us that the Cowboys were playing Monday night. The guy who cancelled is a huge Dallas fan - wears a Dallas jersey every Sunday - and goes to his in-laws to watch the games. Personally, I think we got played and I'm pretty pissed - as are at least two other band members. We were willing to rearrange our lives (and asked others to do the same) thinking that this guy needed us to work around a pressing matter for him - for an oil change that I could have easily done for him a half hour before practice - or worse, a football game whose outcome has ZERO affect on how our band performs (unlike cancelling practice). I'm really not even pissed that we canceled practice - just that it was for such a bull{censored} reason. Anyhow, in light of this new information, the other guy refused to reschedule his dinner and we didn't rehearse at all this week, which is probably best because we're all still stewing. I have yet to hear back from the guy who cancelled on Monday. But I'm sure his wife talked to him after our text conversation. What do you think? Was cancelling the way he did a {censored}ty move on his part or are we over-reacting? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members chadd Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 I'd be pissed too, but that's just me. The better you know people, the easier it is to dislike them. At least now you know that you have to schedule around Cowboy games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members n9ne Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 As a diehard (and truth be told, rather obsessive) Tennessee Titans fan, I am all too familiar with your bandmate's position. I understand it completely. That said....if it was that important to him, then he should have been up front with everyone and made other arrangements well in advance...weeks, even. (The schedule was announced in April, so it's not like it was a recent development.) Given enough notice, I doubt anyone would have had a problem moving rehearsal to Sunday or Wednesday night. I don't blame him for wanting very badly to see the game....but he handled the situation in about the worst way possible, short of simply not showing up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wardjames Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 I'd be pissed off personally. I think you're totally right to be mad. Do they not have DVR there? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Canadian Jeff Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 I'd be pissed. What 'cha gonna do though? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tim_7string Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Practice always seems to be a problem for one of my band members, but the rest of us can meet it just fine. There always seems to be at least one person that needs a little extra nudge in my experience. It might be something you'll just have to deal with sometimes, although as a bandleader myself, I would be pretty miffed if I were in your shoes right now. I fully believe band practice has been the key ingredient to our recent boom of bookings, not just the fact that we have a great female bassist that can sing her ass off (think bluesy, passionate delivery like Susan Tedeschi). We actually sound like a tight band now! Getting those intros and endings down pat has been a direct result of those pesky band rehearsals. If I were you, I would have a band meeting during the next practice to address the issue in a calm manner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dan88z Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Cowboys fans, what can you expect. Midway thru the season he'll have jumped off the bandwagon and you'll be able to practice even on Sunday afternoons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jeff42 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 sounds like There & Back Again's last 9 months... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wheresgrant3 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 So after a relatively successful weekend gig, we were all ready to start rehearsing new songs and improve a few things with our show at practice on Monday. Well, around 6AM Monday morning I got a text from a band member saying he couldn't do practice because he had to take his wife's car to her parents to get fixed that evening. Ok, that's valid, right - she has to be able to get to work, right? Maybe the brakes need changed or something else that shouldn't wait for safety reasons or whatever. Right? Well, one band member has class on Tuesday and Thursday evenings, so Wednesday was our only other option. Another band member already had a dinner scheduled with his parents for Wednesday but said he would cancel if it was absolutely necessary. I didn't want to be the guy who couldn't come through for his bandmates, so I asked my coworkers to move a meeting from Wednesday to Monday so I would be able to get out of work on time that day. Six people were able to make the change (some rescheduled babysitters) and we could meet without the one person that couldn't switch - I love my coworkers. Great - now we were all set to be able to rehearse on Wednesday. I didn't know what was wrong with the car, but I texted him after I got home Monday evening to tell him that he could use my truck in case it couldn't be fixed right away. No response. So I texted his wife to tell her the same thing. She answered LOL saying it just needed an oil change. I told her I was under the impression that it was more important because her husband canceled practice for it. She said he never mentioned practice - but she works late so she's not really affected by that anyhow. Then... the band member who was going to reschedule with his parents told us that the Cowboys were playing Monday night. The guy who cancelled is a huge Dallas fan - wears a Dallas jersey every Sunday - and goes to his in-laws to watch the games. Personally, I think we got played and I'm pretty pissed - as are at least two other band members. We were willing to rearrange our lives (and asked others to do the same) thinking that this guy needed us to work around a pressing matter for him - for an oil change that I could have easily done for him a half hour before practice - or worse, a football game whose outcome has ZERO affect on how our band performs (unlike cancelling practice). I'm really not even pissed that we canceled practice - just that it was for such a bull{censored} reason. Anyhow, in light of this new information, the other guy refused to reschedule his dinner and we didn't rehearse at all this week, which is probably best because we're all still stewing. I have yet to hear back from the guy who cancelled on Monday. But I'm sure his wife talked to him after our text conversation. What do you think? Was cancelling the way he did a {censored}ty move on his part or are we over-reacting? Cancelling for any reason personal is not a problem. Things happen and although I would never expect the members of my band to make a decision like that, it just shows the level of committment he has at that point to be a part of a regularly gigging band. Lying about it of course is not OK. We had a band member once that lied about an emergency room visit resulting in us canceling a show on a Friday night, only to find out that he was at his girlfriends birthday celebration all night. The decision to fire him was made in 24 hours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Blackbird 13 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 If I can't trust the people I'm onstage with... there's NO WAY I'm going to pay them to do a job for me. I realize your situation isn't the same, but the principle stands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Crustee Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 it's football bro. Musicians have to make a lot of sacrifices during FB season. now, if he didn't wanna practice because he'd miss an episode of "Murder, She Wrote", I'd have a problem... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rog951 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Monday practice after weekend gigs would suck anyway. I think I'd need more decompression time before rehearsal. As it is, we don't rehearse during the week, only on non-gig weekends. But I know you guys gig a lot more often than we do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bnelly428 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Monday practice after weekend gigs would suck anyway. +1 HOWEVER, we have rescheduled practices for more minor reasons, but we are all cool about it. I have said before, "can't do Thursday, that's date night" or "can't do Tuesday (our normal day) long day of meetings and really need to do some things when I get home" As long as everyone is HONEST about their reasoning, I could care less. If it's a matter of not knowing the scheduled material, I'm pissed. But if he had said "I can't Monday, Dallas is playing" ok fine. When else can we play? We only practice every other week now so it is nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wheresgrant3 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Monday practice after weekend gigs would suck anyway. I think I'd need more decompression time before rehearsal. As it is, we don't rehearse during the week, only on non-gig weekends. But I know you guys gig a lot more often than we do. We never practice on Mondays just for that very reason. Tuesday is our main night and our fall backs are Wed/Thursday. We decide on the songs the week before and most of us are scrambling to learn them Monday (me included) after a long weekend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BlueStrat Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 It sucks, but unless you're a band of fully committed pro-type players who have a common vision to go somewhere, or you pay your guys to practice, this is what you get. Since pro gigs are pretty much gone, everyone is a hobbyist of varying degree. It's that varying degree thing that is a killer for a band leader. As I've said before, two types of people play music today: Type one, the person for whom the band is the object-once you start gigging, it's party time. Just being in a band is enough for them; they like to go play out and party with their friends and get their jollies on stage. The band is little more than an activity like bowling or a game of darts for them with their pals. The money is a factor but it's secondary if even that important. Type two is the person who plays for the music and what it can do for the band members, for whom the band is the vehicle, a means to an end rather than an end in itself. For these people, the band needs to be sharp, professional, and a priority, because it is through the band that the objectives of type twos are going to be met- prestige in the community, higher pay, respect from peers, and demand from venues. The trouble today is that most people are a mix of the two, but most lean toward being type ones- especially for cover bands, and especially now. I had a gig at the Knitting Factory Concert Hall last Friday, and we were preparing for it when I had one guy tell me his parents couldn't do their time share so he decided to take his girlfriend and use it for a week, but he'd be back the night before the gig. I just had another guy tell me he'll be in Seattle for part of June and most of July next summer because he has a sailboat there and wants to use it. Nevermind that those two months are the peak season for concerts and festivals here. I can't be pissed because the band isn't these guys' lives like it is mine. There isn't much money in it and while playing gigs is fun, the work that goes along with it is seen as an inconvenience that cuts into their lives rather than a necessity. Sorry to be a Debbie Downer, but that's the way it is. I just have a stable of subs at hand and deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BlueStrat Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Monday practice after weekend gigs would suck anyway. I think I'd need more decompression time before rehearsal. As it is, we don't rehearse during the week, only on non-gig weekends. But I know you guys gig a lot more often than we do. Actually I like Monday rehearsals and that's when we mostly do them, because the errors made and stuff that needs work is still fresh. Since guys are learning songs on their own, having them ready to go on a Monday isn't any harder than having them ready on any other day. Plus I solo gig on a lot of weeknights, but Monday is rarely one of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BigMac5 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 As I've said before, two types of people play music today: Type one, the person for whom the band is the object-once you start gigging, it's party time. Just being in a band is enough for them; they like to go play out and party with their friends and get their jollies on stage. The band is little more than an activity like bowling or a game of darts for them with their pals. The money is a factor but it's secondary if even that important. Type two is the person who plays for the music and what it can do for the band members, for whom the band is the vehicle, a means to an end rather than an end in itself. For these people, the band needs to be sharp, professional, and a priority, because it is through the band that the objectives of type twos are going to be met- prestige in the community, higher pay, respect from peers, and demand from venues. This. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jeff42 Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 we have cancelled practice for all kinds of reasons and in the last 6-9 months we have cancelled frequently. I chock it up to: Lives get busy. Now if someone was making stuff up just to get out of practice that would be different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TrickyBoy Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Of the whole story, the only thing that would piss me off is the lying. We cancel practices for all kinds of reasons: football, families, even "you know, I'm just not in the mood today". For me it's all god so long as everyone is honest and upfront with each other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members kmart Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 we have cancelled practice for all kinds of reasons and in the last 6-9 months we have cancelled frequently. I chock it up to: Lives get busy. Now if someone was making stuff up just to get out of practice that would be different. Yep. We have a 'typical' night (Wed.) to get together, but regularly change that based on everyone's availability. One of our guys is a live sound engineer and works nights, so it's not uncommon that he ends up working on our usual night...No problem at all; we just communicate when we're availabile and not in advance, and pick a night to get together based on that. If we have to drop a week or two here and there because of that, so be it, but we put the pressure on ourselves to make sure we do get appropriate time for tightening up new material and especially to make sure we're solid on things right ahead of gigs. We're all adults with personal lives and jobs and other responsibilities and commitments, including things that others might consider extra-curricular/recreational (and thus, somehow less important than band practice, I guess?); but nobody I play with would make up an excuse for why they weren't available. Doing so is inexcusable in my book, and indicative of larger problems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members FitchFY Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Pffft. The Cowboys SUCK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Zon5string Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 If someone is actually a ("diehard") fan of a team, they'll already know the schedule and last-minute changes wouldn't even be necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members stratotastic Posted September 29, 2011 Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Of the whole story, the only thing that would piss me off is the lying. We cancel practices for all kinds of reasons: football, families, even "you know, I'm just not in the mood today". For me it's all god so long as everyone is honest and upfront with each other. Agreed. The lying part would piss me off. But practice gets cancelled from time to time. Personally, I probably wouldn't have moved the work meeting around though. You only get to pull that card very occasionally since there are others involved, moving their own schedules around to accommodate you, and it was a gamble with the rest of the band being sketchy that week. But live and learn... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mstreck Posted September 29, 2011 Author Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 +1 HOWEVER, we have rescheduled practices for more minor reasons, but we are all cool about it. I have said before, "can't do Thursday, that's date night" or "can't do Tuesday (our normal day) long day of meetings and really need to do some things when I get home" As long as everyone is HONEST about their reasoning, I could care less. If it's a matter of not knowing the scheduled material, I'm pissed. But if he had said "I can't Monday, Dallas is playing" ok fine. When else can we play? We only practice every other week now so it is nice. We intentionally scheduled Mondays because Tue and Thu are definitely out (one person has classes). That leaves Wednesday available if anyone *needs* to reschedule. I think what bothers us the most is that he cancelled the day of, at 6AM - a time when everyone was asleep and we couldn't respond or reorganize. Really, didn't he know he would be taking his car there before that? What, did his father-in-law call him at 5:30 AM to arrange it? Because if he did, he couldn't have simply said "I can't - got band practice. How about Tuesday?" No - I think what bothers us the most is that we already know the answers to those questions. Simply asking if we could be finished before the game came on would have meant that we would have all done exactly that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mstreck Posted September 29, 2011 Author Members Share Posted September 29, 2011 Agreed. The lying part would piss me off.But practice gets cancelled from time to time. Personally, I probably wouldn't have moved the work meeting around though. You only get to pull that card very occasionally since there are others involved, moving their own schedules around to accommodate you, and it was a gamble with the rest of the band being sketchy that week. But live and learn... Yeah, but we were going to practice on Wednesday until the other guy figured out about the game being on. You're absolutely right, I won't get to pull that card again - nor will I try. FYI - we ended up meeting again on Wednesday to regroup anyhow. I still would have been home in time had we practiced, but it was sooooo not worth it given the way things played out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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