Song Insecurity: Who else gets it, how long does it last, and can anything be done?

[New Trail]

As a fairly new songwriter I've been pretty positive about our efforts so far. Also, the fact that the other musicians in the band, who I respect both individually and collectively, like the songs, has been a sustaining point for me. However, for some reason, after Tuesday nights rehearsal I've been questioning the songs. Are they good enough, are the words trite, are they original enough, will people like them, etc. etc.? I've been about half-way depressed for the past two days and I can't figure out why. Rehearsal was good and everyone in the band gets along great and the songs are coming together nicely. Is a let-down like this a common phenomenon for a new songwriter and when can I expect it to be over?

 

Thanks!

[blue2blue]

Everyone is a little (or a lot) different, of course, but I think self-doubt often goes with creativity.

 

But, having known a few exceptions to that who seemed to have few confidence problems -- but also seemed to be burdened by an inability to see their own work as anything other than glittering gems of undeniable and inarguable brilliance -- I would go on to suggest that a little self-doubt is probably not an altogether unhealthy thing -- as long as it doesn't keep you from writing and continuing to improve your craft.

[oldgitplayer]

I'm fine with creative insecurity - I've always had it and always will.

Similarly with certainty in anything. I live with uncertainty with most things. I really don't understand people with certainty.

 

As Blue says, too much insecurity and you may wind up doing nothing.

Too little insecurity and you may never improve because you think you're already great.

 

So I think you're in a good place. Just keep at it.

[LCK]

 

I've been about half-way depressed for the past two days and I can't figure out why. Rehearsal was good and everyone in the band gets along great and the songs are coming together nicely. Is a let-down like this a common phenomenon for a new songwriter and when can I expect it to be over?

 

 

There's a feel-good neurochemical called dopamine that gets released when someone takes a hit of cocaine, gets drunk, etc. It also gets released when you're putting the pieces of a song together. (Technically, dopamine gets released whenever an organism engages in a process called "pattern recognition," alcohol and cocaine run a short-cut on the usual release process.) So sometimes, when all the pieces of a song fit together, the dopamine has done its work, it shuts off, and it can feel a little depressing.

 

Paul Simon once said he has to stop himself from continually rewriting a song because after a lifetime of experience, he came to realize that the process of finding just the right word, just the right chord or melody line, always gave him a natural high. Once he came to that realization it wasn't too hard for him figure out that that was sometimes why he got depressed after writing a song, or why he felt compelled to keep rewriting a song that was already finished.

 

Anyway, that's what I believe.

 

LCK

[NeverTheMachine]

 

As a fairly new songwriter I've been pretty positive about our efforts so far. Also, the fact that the other musicians in the band, who I respect both individually and collectively, like the songs, has been a sustaining point for me. However, for some reason, after Tuesday nights rehearsal I've been questioning the songs. Are they good enough, are the words trite, are they original enough, will people like them, etc. etc.? I've been about half-way depressed for the past two days and I can't figure out why. Rehearsal was good and everyone in the band gets along great and the songs are coming together nicely. Is a let-down like this a common phenomenon for a new songwriter and when can I expect it to be over? Thanks!

 

 

It's very common, and healthy and will help you improve in most cases. Where you have to draw the line at though is "will people like them?" .... Trust me, it's pointless. People are people and you can't control what they'll like...

 

You can let yourself be insecure about whether if you put your best effort of creativity/originality into a song, but you need to stop as soon as you delve into public perception territory. Just make music that you would like to listen to. You're a musician, who decided to make songs and was able to ... that means you know a thing or two as it is about what's good, or not.

[grace_slick]

I think apart from those weirdo types who cannot see any fault or shortcomings with their own selves, doubt and insecurity is a necessity to anything creative. If you weren't insecure, you wouldn't care. And songwriting, to me anyway, is all about caring. However, you do need a balance...or as Blue said, you wouldn't be able to do anything.

[Monkey Uncle]

 

Are they good enough, are the words trite, are they original enough, will people like them, etc. etc.?

 

 

One way to find out - post them here and ask for feedback. Just be sure you're ready to accept constructive criticism without damage to the confidence you have left.

[Lee Knight]

Great comments above ^ all of them. You guys are cool.

 

You know, when you start writing, it's not easy. For those cogs to mesh with the other gear's teeth in your creative mind's machine and get all that dopamine coursing through your synapses, firing through your neural network... it's a buzz (per LDK, AKA Lee), and it's work. So, once you've got something on paper, then recorder, then being performed by your team, well, that takes balls. Why?

 

Cause it might suck. Or it might not be as great as you felt when you were bowled over by that initial wave of dopamine.

 

That's what rewriting is for. There's always a little needed nip and tuck. Or sometimes a total face transplant. And just as it was difficult to work up to that state of heightened creative frenzy, it is hard to go back in and make things better. And funny enough, you get better at making things better. Rewriting is a skill that needs refining just as getting the ball rolling and keeping it rolling needs refining. Sometimes you go too far and castrate your work. Sometimes not far enough cause it could use a little loping off of the danglies.

 

It's a skill that needs to be refined. Rewriting. Open the hood and take a look. Sometimes it's just a loose wire. Sometimes it's nothing, what was I thinking? And sometimes...

[New Trail]

Thanks for the replies. I feel better already!

 

 

....Where you have to draw the line at though is "will people like them?" .... Trust me, it's pointless. People are people and you can't control what they'll like.......

 

 

That makes good sense. I'll try to remember to do that! Thanks!

[Johnny-Boy]

I've been questioning the songs. Are they good enough, are the words trite, are they original enough, will people like them, etc. etc.?

 

 

After completing a track, if I have any of the above questions, I consider the track unfinished. Time to go back to the drawing board. Sometimes it just needs a new mix. Other times I scrap the entire project and start over. But to me, any doubt is a red alert.

 

John

[oldgitplayer]

.John

 

I'm going to partly disagree with you here. It's too easy to keep working at something and not recognising the point where it's finished.

I've seen it often in the process of design, where a concept has achieved what it set out to do, but the designer just keeps going. We thus call things 'over-designed'.

 

So it's just as important to be able to recognise when to stop.

[Chicken Monkey]

Once you start playing them for people, you'll start to realize that you'd be OK with people hating them, because at least then you'd know they were listening. Apathy--which will be what you get from most people, regardless of the quality of your work--is the most frustrating reaction, but it's the least scary.

[kurdy]

At the beginning, I

[oldgitplayer]

As kurdy says, how do you know if what you've written is really any good?

If George Harrison wanted to use "Handle with care' as a B-side, before someone stopped him, it demonstrates that even the most seasoned of songwriters can't always differentiate between their ordinary and top-notch.

R&R history is peppered with stories like this, so I guess most songwriters need others to help with assessing a song's quality.

[Cliftonb]

I'm kinda weird in that I am actually very confident in my abilities as a songwriter and composer. I believe it's needed - especially for someone who wants any level of recognition or commercial success. In this case a musician has to believe that they can really bring it when pitted against the best and brightest of the future present and the past.

 

My perception of myself as a songwriter is tempered, though. Not with self-doubt or insecurity but something infinitely more powerful. That thing is...BOREDOM. Even if I write something that I think is awesome, I go "Hey! This is awessss...ugh - now I'm bored." Then I have to do something completely different than what I did just a moment ago. For me, boredom is probably the most powerful and defining factor in my development as a musician.

[grace_slick]

 

Once you start playing them for people, you'll start to realize that you'd be OK with people hating them, because at least then you'd know they were listening . Apathy--which will be what you get from most people, regardless of the quality of your work--is the most frustrating reaction, but it's the least scary.

 

 

Yes, I have accepted now finally that the apathy I receive from most people I know in "real life" is not a negative reflection on my songs, but it's just...the standard reaction for some reason.

[ido1957]

Not everyone will like your songs - not everybody likes every song on the radio no matter how cleverly written and produced. If you ever honestly said to yourself after writing your song(s) "this is good - I like it" then you've achieved a bit of self awareness that will keep you in good stead whenever you feel a little "unsure" of your stuff.