OT: Embarassing stories/things about you thread

[Zacman0126]

Yeah wtf, is superbad all of a sudden a documentary now?

[kool98769]

When I was a senior in highschool, I was trying to score some booze. So I went by this house party (older people) to see if I could pull a "hey Mr" or snag a case or something. in the meantime, I end up "dancing" with this total skeeze. Shes grinding away on my leg hardcore. Im like whatever, and go along with it. Then afterwards this dude points to my leg like I spilled something. it was her period blood on me... FML. Good news is, the next day I ended up going to the mall with my best friend and met up with my dream girl and we had a great day shopping.

 

fag.

 

But really,

my best friend had a guy on his floor who had this happen to him. They all went to Spin Nightclub (minneapolis) and he got the superbad stains on his leg. He said the poor kid has never lived it down. haha.

[rushtallica]

A sad thing:

Look at my post-count and add about another 5k to it for posts lost a few years ago.

[peavey_impact]

When I was a kid I had this badass lil Kawasaki 110 threewheeler and one day me and a buddy were riding around cuttin' up, when we decided to ride by this old cemetary that was down the road from my house.

 

Being the little bastards that we were we decided it would be fun to jump some grave slabs - turns out they make perfect threewheeler ramps

 

After about 10 or 15 minutes of this a shows up out of nowhere (this was wayy out in the country) and bitches us the {censored} out and puts us in the back of his car. First we were brought back to face our parents, then we had to get back into the cop car and ride out to the old people's house who owned the lot the cemetary was on and had family buried there. We had to tell this old lady that we were sorry for ramping her dead relatives graves as she burst into tears

[boatshoes]

When I was a kid I had this badass lil Kawasaki 110 threewheeler and one day me and a buddy were riding around cuttin' up, when we decided to ride by this old cemetary that was down the road from my house. Being the little bastards that we were we decided it would be fun to jump some grave slabs - turns out they make perfect threewheeler ramps After about 10 or 15 minutes of this a shows up out of nowhere (this was wayy out in the country) and bitches us the {censored} out and puts us in the back of his car. First we were brought back to face our parents, then we had to get back into the cop car and ride out to the old people's house who owned the lot the cemetary was on and had family buried there. We had to tell this old lady that we were sorry for ramping her dead relatives graves as she burst into tears

[Slaymoar]

I listen to lady gaga and other girly music... and enjoy it..

 

Ga - ga - ooh la la!

 

 

Oh, and I love dancing even if I didnt drink anything lol... But I'm south american..

 

-D

[Slaymoar]

I once asked a girl out in 7th grade and she laughed at me like I was kidding...juicier ones to come later!

I asked a girl out in 5th grade, and she full out punched me in the face!!

Then... :cry:

[Steverino]

I was a busboy at a local high-class seafood place. I was bussing a table next to a table of 3, dad, mom and hawt daugther. She was watching me so I thought I'd bus with some flair. I grabbed a knife and the butter pat on the blade flicked off and landed right inbetween her boobs. Dad jumped up, I ran for cover.

[boatshoes]

I asked a girl out in 5th grade, and she full out punched me in the face!! Then... :cry:

Women were tough back then...boys were pre-puberty haha

[Dr.Picklebottom]

when i was in the 7th grade i got partnered with this girl i had a crush on for a project that we had a presentation for.

we had to speak in front of the class and when i was around her i couldnt speak properly. i was very shy and couldnt get my thoughts together.

the day of the presentation i woke up early and practiced for hours. when it was time to prsent our project i felt like i was going to have a heartattack. we knew what order we were going to present in a i was 3rd from last. it seemed to take forevvvvvvvvver. finally it was our turn.

it went off without a hitch, i did fine. its not like we got married right ofter that or anything but i did ok.

later that day i {censored} my pants on the bus.

[peavey_impact]

I was a busboy at a local high-class seafood place. I was bussing a table next to a table of 3, dad, mom and hawt daugther. She was watching me so I thought I'd bus with some flair. I grabbed a knife and the butter pat on the blade flicked off and landed right inbetween her boobs. Dad jumped up, I ran for cover.

lmfao that is epic :lol:

[Slaymoar]

I was a busboy at a local high-class seafood place. I was bussing a table next to a table of 3, dad, mom and hawt daugther. She was watching me so I thought I'd bus with some flair. I grabbed a knife and the butter pat on the blade flicked off and landed right inbetween her boobs. Dad jumped up, I ran for cover.

Thats {censored}ing hawt.

[Jesse G]

I was a busboy at a local high-class seafood place. I was bussing a table next to a table of 3, dad, mom and hawt daugther. She was watching me so I thought I'd bus with some flair. I grabbed a knife and the butter pat on the blade flicked off and landed right inbetween her boobs. Dad jumped up, I ran for cover.

 

 

That's amazing.

[.homewrecker.]

When I was a senior in highschool, I was trying to score some booze. So I went by this house party (older people) to see if I could pull a "hey Mr" or snag a case or something. in the meantime, I end up "dancing" with this total skeeze. Shes grinding away on my leg hardcore. Im like whatever, and go along with it. Then afterwards this dude points to my leg like I spilled something. it was her period blood on me... FML. Good news is, the next day I ended up going to the mall with my best friend and met up with my dream girl and we had a great day shopping.

 

 

Something very similar happened to a friend of mine, he and some buddies went out to a strip club for his birthday. So like all good bros they buy him a few lap dances for his birthday, well birthday boy wore khaki pants, we call him Skidz from now on.

[boatshoes]

Something very similar happened to a friend of mine, he and some buddies went out to a strip club for his birthday. So like all good bros they buy him a few lap dances for his birthday, well birthday boy wore khaki pants, we call him Skidz from now on.

stop. these stories are making me sick.

i started a thread about this {censored} earlier this week.

PERIOD BLOOD FOR THE LOSS.

[co&cafan808]

When I was a senior in highschool, I was trying to score some booze. So I went by this house party (older people) to see if I could pull a "hey Mr" or snag a case or something. in the meantime, I end up "dancing" with this total skeeze. Shes grinding away on my leg hardcore. Im like whatever, and go along with it. Then afterwards this dude points to my leg like I spilled something. it was her period blood on me... FML. Good news is, the next day I ended up going to the mall with my best friend and met up with my dream girl and we had a great day shopping.

 

 

[YOUTUBE][/YOUTUBE]

[.homewrecker.]

stop. these stories are making me sick. i started a thread about this {censored} earlier this week. PERIOD BLOOD FOR THE LOSS.

Oh this wasn't period blood sir. Skidz was short for skid mark

[satannica]

Years ago, I played in a typical making coin style function band. So I quickly gather that girls have a thing for bassists. They just do. I had options

We played this wedding and being young and full of hormones, I wanted to try an older woman. I kept hearing how fit older women were da bomb. I got chatting to this lady with {censored}ing perfect tits, great bod and eventually we spent the night together.

In the morning, I wake up and she's already dressed and getting ready. She smiles, we chat for a bit and generally get on. She's ready to leave and as she does, she hands me an envelope with money in it. I'm like, wtf? She says "it's payment... for the band?"

Turned out to be the groom's Mother!! The worst part was, I went down to Breakfast where my band cheered me on entrance and the groom and his new wife sat adjacent finishing their meal. I didn't know where to look... I still dunno if he knew!!!!

[peavey_impact]

Years ago, I played in a typical making coin style function band. So I quickly gather that girls have a thing for bassists. They just do. I had options We played this wedding and being young and full of hormones, I wanted to try an older woman. I kept hearing how fit older women were da bomb. I got chatting to this lady with {censored}ing perfect tits, great bod and eventually we spent the night together. In the morning, I wake up and she's already dressed and getting ready. She smiles, we chat for a bit and generally get on. She's ready to leave and as she does, she hands me an envelope with money in it. I'm like, wtf? She says "it's payment... for the band?" Turned out to be the groom's Mother!! The worst part was, I went down to Breakfast where my band cheered me on entrance and the groom and his new wife sat adjacent finishing their meal. I didn't know where to look... I still dunno if he knew!!!!

Epic {censored}ing win!!

[this is paul]

Nice!


Well, did she live upto the expectation?

Years ago, I played in a typical making coin style function band. So I quickly gather that girls have a thing for bassists. They just do. I had options We played this wedding and being young and full of hormones, I wanted to try an older woman. I kept hearing how fit older women were da bomb. I got chatting to this lady with {censored}ing perfect tits, great bod and eventually we spent the night together. In the morning, I wake up and she's already dressed and getting ready. She smiles, we chat for a bit and generally get on. She's ready to leave and as she does, she hands me an envelope with money in it. I'm like, wtf? She says "it's payment... for the band?" Turned out to be the groom's Mother!! The worst part was, I went down to Breakfast where my band cheered me on entrance and the groom and his new wife sat adjacent finishing their meal. I didn't know where to look... I still dunno if he knew!!!!

[satannica]

She was pretty damned good anyway. Made me better in bed for sure! My performance improved greatly.


And another one, same band, different wedding.

I was chatting to this young honey and she was pretty stonking. Had a shock of black and red hair, sexy legs that went ALL the way up, claimed to have a clit ring, the works. I was in there, plying her with my moves and chatting to her in depth. We snogged a little, made out, chatted more, snogged a little more...

Anyways, my guitarist comes up to me after we'd packed up - well as a bassist, I had an amp and a single guitar case, done in five minutes. He comes running up and exclaims that he couldn't find our keyboardist and needed our help. We'll call said keyboardist, "Mike" for all intents and purposes.

I was like... little busy here, man... what's the urgency and can someone else sort it out? He persisted and she said not to worry, she'll catch up with me later and got up and went away. I can still see those sexy goddamned legs walking off, it was like a movie!

I coulda {censored}ing shot him. In fact, if I had a gun, I would have shot him! I was like "What's so {censored}ing important, he can look after himself, look what you did... you made me blow it with an extra{censored}ing fine piece of ass called Sexylegs!".

We eventually found Mike. In the parking lot sat on a bench, having a proper snog with someone. I thought, OK he's getting lucky! Good on him! He was complaining he didn't get much action! Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be some bloke he was necking. Total surprise to us. I just said, "Well there ya go... AND YOU WERE WORRIED! See? He's fine, now let me get back to Sexylegs!"

So I wander back in looking for sexylegs. Alas I never saw her again. I did ask a few people who said she'd already left...

Next morning, going home in the van, Mike was absolutely freaking. He thought the dude was a girl. He was dealing with all sorts of disgust about necking some dude. Secretly I know I shoulda "saved" him like a mate would have. But the vendictive bastard side of me was secretly thinking "Serves you right, for making me blow it with sexylegs!" I mean, this girl was fine! Fine fine fine!

Fast forward a few years, "Mike" is a fully out there homosexual. Who knew? And he'd held a grudge against me for years for not saving him from his moment of ex-closetness!

[Renoir1]

^ :arg:

[jnurp]

Years ago, I played in a typical making coin style function band. So I quickly gather that girls have a thing for bassists. They just do. I had options We played this wedding and being young and full of hormones, I wanted to try an older woman. I kept hearing how fit older women were da bomb. I got chatting to this lady with {censored}ing perfect tits, great bod and eventually we spent the night together. In the morning, I wake up and she's already dressed and getting ready. She smiles, we chat for a bit and generally get on. She's ready to leave and as she does, she hands me an envelope with money in it. I'm like, wtf? She says "it's payment... for the band?" Turned out to be the groom's Mother!! The worst part was, I went down to Breakfast where my band cheered me on entrance and the groom and his new wife sat adjacent finishing their meal. I didn't know where to look... I still dunno if he knew!!!!

this is {censored}ing downright heroic!

[Zacman0126]

I was expecting to hear the part where sexy legs turned out to be the man in the parking lot making out with Mike.

[ShaneV2]

When I was about 16 I had a short few months of sleepwalking. No big deal, but one night I really had to pee while sleepwalking and dreamed that the keyboard of my computer was a urinal (I can actually still remember the dream). I'm just glad I didn't have a laptop at the time...