What are your HCEG pet peeves?

[Large]

NOW I'm insulted ... How come nobody's ever expended this amount of critical-theory energy and hi-calorie parodic paradigm to deconstruct, or extrapolate from, MY posts?!?!? You SUCK, dude! You must be as zakkin GHEY as GIBSON and Guitar Center! CHINEEEEEEEESE!

Your name is Charles, is it? In that case...

Charles has recently made a number of people very, very angry, including me. However, as anger serves no function in a successful rebuttal, I will simply state objectively that the older Charles gets, the more pudibund he becomes. But before I continue, allow me to explain that I enjoy the great diversity of humankind, in our food, our dress, our music, our literature, and our forms of spiritual expression. What I don't enjoy are Charles's twisted crotchets, which force us to tailor our snow jobs just to suit his irritable whims. His victims have been speaking out for years. Unfortunately, their voices have long been silenced by the roar and thunder of Charles's vicegerents, who loudly proclaim that Charles is the most recent incarnation of the Buddha. Regardless of those mawkish proclamations, the truth is that one of his favorite tricks is to create a problem and then to offer the solution. Naturally, it's always his solutions that grant him the freedom to dam the flow of effective communication, never the original problem.

In a tacit concession of defeat, Charles is now openly calling for the abridgment of various freedoms to accomplish coercively what his out-of-touch commentaries have failed at. Despite total incompetence, he is often afflicted with an amazing conceit that causes him to cause scornful subversion to gather momentum on college campuses. In my view, we must plant markers that define the limits of what is disrespectful and what is not. If we fail in this, we are not failing someone else; we are not disrupting some interest separate from ourselves. Rather, it is we who suffer when we neglect to observe that those of us who are still sane, those of us who still have a firm grip on reality, those of us who still contend that Charles is so sinful that he transcends the normal definition of that word into a whole new meaning that also encompasses "shiftless" and "sectarianism-oriented", have an obligation to do more than just observe what Charles is doing from a safe distance. We have an obligation to admonish Charles not seven times, but seventy times seven. We have an obligation to report as best as possible the facts and circumstances surrounding his discourteous diatribes. And we have an obligation to offer a framework for discussion so that we can more quickly reach a consensus.

Worse yet, Charles wants to require schoolchildren to be taught that he is as innocent as a newborn lamb. If there's a rule, and he keeps making exceptions to that rule, then what good is the rule? I mean, what I have been writing up to this point is not what I initially intended to write in this letter. Instead, I decided it would be far more productive to tell you that there is no place in this country where we are safe from Charles's cronies, no place where we are not targeted for hatred and attack.

As Charles matures emotionally he'll eventually grow out of his present way of thinking and come to realize that everyone ought to read my award-winning essay, "The Naked Aggression of Charles". In it, I chronicle all of Charles's calumnies from the self-centered to the insane and conclude that Charles's trained seals work behind the scenes to ascribe opinions to me that I don't even hold. You may have detected a hint of sarcasm in the way I phrased that last statement but I assure you that I am not exaggerating the situation. While there is inevitable overlap at the edges of political movements, we could opt to sit back and let Charles institutionalize adversarialism through systematic violence, distorted religion, and dubious science. Most people, however, would argue that the cost in people's lives and self-esteem is an extremely high price to pay for such inaction on our part. Put simply, if he continues to convince people that their peers are already riding the Charles bandwagon and will think ill of them if they don't climb aboard, too, I will be obliged to do something about him. And you know me: I never neglect my obligations.

We've tolerated Charles's shameless musings long enough. It's time to lose our patience and chill our kindness. It's time to discuss, openly and candidly, a vision for a harmonious, multiracial society. It's time to shout to the world that many people lie. However, Charles lies with such ease it's troubling. I feel funny having to tell readers whom I presume are adults that it is in his nature to be a deceiver and a destroyer and a bloodsucker. I bring that up solely to emphasize that his idiotic claim that he can achieve his goals by friendly and moral conduct is just that, an idiotic claim. Once again, it is not uncommon for Charles to victimize the innocent, penalize the victim for making any effort to defend himself, and then paint the whole evil affair as some great benefit to humanity.

Ladies and gentlemen, Charles maintains a "Big Brother" dossier of personal information about everyone he distrusts, to use as a potential weapon. Is your name listed in that dossier? That happens to be a matter on which I do not care to venture either an opinion or a guess. I do, however, feel that I should state that Charles will probably throw another hissy fit if we don't let him invade every private corner and force every thought into a malicious mold. At least putting up with another Charles hissy fit is easier than convincing Charles's mercenaries that even if Charles's practices were thoroughly successful in making a few people feel better, they would still be demeaning to everyone else. But I digress. Charles's double standards promote a redistribution of wealth. This is always an appealing proposition for Charles's adherents because much of the redistributed wealth will undoubtedly end up in the hands of the redistributors as a condign reward for their loyalty to Charles.

Where does the line get drawn? Charles doesn't want to acknowledge that except for a few bright spots, his hypnopompic insights are completely bloodthirsty. In fact, Charles would rather block all discussion on the subject. I suppose that's because he wants all of us to believe that without his superior guidance, we will go nowhere. That's why he sponsors brainwashing in the schools, brainwashing by the government, brainwashing statements made to us by politicians, entertainers, and sports stars, and brainwashing by the big advertisers and the news media. I am now in a position to define what I mean when I say that it's time that a few facts had a chance to slip through the fusillade of hype. What I mean is that Charles wants you to believe that he is omnipotent. You should be wary of such claims. Be aware! Be skeptical! Think! Do not be diverted, deceived, or mesmerized by Charles's scary credos.

Okay, then, let's move onto the really good part of this letter, the part in which I get to tell you that Charles believes that he is entitled to replace intellectual integrity with fastidious sloganeering. That's just wrong. He further believes that society is screaming for his goals. Wrong again!

Charles will move raucous incendiarism from the intolerant fringe into a realm of respectability long before he can convert me into one of his peons. His desire to inflict more death and destruction than Genghis Khan's hordes is the chief sign that he's an otiose popinjay. (The second sign is that Charles feels obliged to violate the basic tenets of journalism and scholarship.) Let me carry my thoughts on this subject a bit further. He wants to discourage us from expressing our initiatives in whatever way we damn well please. You know what groups have historically wanted to do the same thing? Fascists and Nazis. It goes without saying that Charles has never been accused of objectivity. Charles may mean well but you won't find many of his yes-men who will openly admit that they favor Charles's schemes to strap us down with a network of rules and regulations. In fact, their imprecations are characterized by a plethora of rhetoric to the contrary. If you listen closely, though, you'll hear how carefully they cover up the fact that Charles's animadversions do not represent progress. They represent insanity masquerading as progress.

I have just one word for Charles: teleoroentgenography. If I didn't think he would expose and neutralize his enemies rather than sit at the same table and negotiate, I wouldn't say that I wonder if he really believes the things he says. He knows they're not true, doesn't he? To turn that question around, to what lengths will he go to shame my name? I could give you the answer now but it would be more productive for me first to inform you that I can't possibly believe his claim that he is beyond reproach. If someone can convince me otherwise, I'll eat my hat. Heck, I'll eat a whole closetful of hats. That's a pretty safe bet because Charles's a pretty good liar most of the time. However, he tells so many lies, he's bound to trip himself up someday. Anyway, I hope I've made my point, which is that Charles's policies are an adjudged failure.



-----

I'll link http://www.pakin.org/complaint before I get too many people angry.

[BootRoots]

I also love when people complain about playing a Gibson LP Standard or other Gibby with a bound neck and say the fret ends were so sharp they cut their hand.

[Frets99]

I also love when people complain about playing a Gibson LP Standard or other Gibby with a bound neck and say the fret ends were so sharp they cut their hand.

[DaveAronow]

UUhhh, Did you say yute?

 

Whats a Yute?

[adlo76]

wehn people can't stick to the original topic.

wehn someone gets something new they're proud of and someone either bashes it instead of just not posting in the thread at all, or they give the backhanded compliment: "i normally hate that kind guitars like that, but i like yours!"
as if their the OP should be EXTRA happy that this person complimented them cuz they normally don't like that type of guitar.

or someone will post their HNGD and instead of just giving congrats it'll be something like "i'd change this and that and the other thing BUT HNGD!"
grrrrr

[csm]

T'ank ye koindly, sor. 'Tis all Oi needed t'validate moi existence as a notionally human bein' on dis board, sor. Moi grandchildren t'ank ye also fer dat toiny gesture'a recognition drahn frum yer many templates'a redundant oideolagical discourse, sor!

 

Only problem is Oi don't quoite get der relevance ov all dat femoral fistular stuff ta which youse allude ...

[adlo76]

when people speak for others. don't dig that too much either.

[Prages]

I actually get kind of sick of all the NGD threads.


Seriously, I know people get excited and want to show off their new guitars, but do we really need 10 NGD threads on the first page?

[csm]

when people speak for others. don't dig that too much either.

 

 

How dare you say that! I was just about to say that!

[adlo76]

How dare you say that! I was just about to say that!

i said for ya. that's what good mates do fer eachother
:lol:

[Ferdinandstrat]

When I post the fruit of my loins(metaphorically, you perverts), that I have worked on oh so hardly and I know it's not the best looking but I am still proud of it thing and then people trolling and bashing me about it.

Seriously, in this place, if something is made by you and you post it here it is never good enough for the people here.

[csm]

i said for ya. that's what good mates do fer eachother :lol:

MWAH!

Mah BUDDY!

(Incidentally: 'yute' = 'young person (or people).' As in reggaespeak: 'da yute-dem gettin faasti.'

[adlo76]

Seriously, in this place, if something is made by you and you post it here it is never good enough for the people here.

 

 

 

i don't dig blanket statements too much. could do without them.

[adlo76]

MWAH! Mah BUDDY! (Incidentally: 'yute' = 'young person (or people).' As in reggaespeak: 'da yute-dem gettin faasti.'

 

 

i&i knows bout yutes. yute like forever!

[Ferdinandstrat]

i don't dig blanket statements too much. could do without them.

 

 

This wasnt a blanket statement, that was a whole bed set statement.

[dcooper830]

I hate posts like this:

The ESP guitars are very fine and a great price/value. The Gibsons in the $600 range are not to compare with ESP, unless you just happen upon an extraordinary one, probably used. The Epi's, imho are crap , and there are better value guitars to be had in that price range.

 

[BobbaFret]

I hate when people say "Use the search function."
Then when someone uses search and brings up an old thread you have people bitching about an old thread being bumped.
Make up my mind people!

[DaveAronow]

I actually get kind of sick of all the NGD threads. Seriously, I know people get excited and want to show off their new guitars, but do we really need 10 NGD threads on the first page?

 

Yes we do!!!

 

We LOVE guitars.

 

It is why we are here.

 

BUT....and Frets, I hope you are listening....

 

It shuld be a bannable offense to post anything remotely alluding to a new guitar day, if you havent actually recieved the guitar yet, AND if you cant post pics of said guitar.

 

None of this..

 

I ordered this!!!...(posts generic pic from website)

 

They are a'shippin this!!! see ABove

 

I am havin em build this!!!!! ||

 

Last night I dreamt of this........

 

And then they make another thread when the guitar actually gets here.

 

Were like, Yeah, uhm, nice guitar man. Weve kinda already seen it, been there done that, but whatever man.

 

Happy new.............something..................I forgot what we were talkin about(aboot for the Canadians)

[csm]

When I post the fruit of my loins(metaphorically, you perverts), that I have worked on oh so hardly and I know it's not the best looking but I am still proud of it thing and then people trolling and bashing me about it. Seriously, in this place, if something is made by you and you post it here it is never good enough for the people here.

 

 

Which is how Frets99 and MetalheadUK became the bitter, twisted, misanthropic bastards they are today.

 

(Oh, WAIT ... they don't SHRED ...)

[Frets99]

So am I gonna come in tomorrow and see no new threads or only civil posts by politely clapping forumites????

 

[RaVenCAD]

It will fall out of favor soon enough. When I was a kid, we used 'That's gay.' Once we hit about 12 years old, nobody said it anymore. I didn't really start seeing or hearing things described as 'ghey' again until the last couple of years. I also hate when people say 'That's sick' as a compliment.

But the thing is, the word "gay" as a description of an item, or band, or singer, or whatever, has absolutely nothing to do with actually being gay. Some people are apparently so overly PC (or perhaps they're just sensitive due to their own personal lifestyle) they like to think that you aren't allowed to even say the word in any context. Sorry, but when a "forum Nazi" like that decides what I'm allowed and not allowed to say, it just makes me what to do it more, even if it's just to piss them off...

[adlo76]

This wasnt a blanket statement, that was a whole bed set statement.

 

 

u make-a no sense

[Virgman]

"Pet Peeve" threads piss me off.

 

And Nazis.

[BobbaFret]

= The 'omg, my ultimate NGD is today ... ' thread, I haven't figured out how its gone onto more than 5 pages, then again I haven't read them all so it jsut annoys me to still see it everyday.

 

 

WTF?

Don't knock it till you try it.

It's where all the cool kids hang out.

[ej]

the inevitable Nitro vs Poly threads.

i hate em, they always pop up eventually

otherwise, whatever. people are gonna be stupid no matter where you go, might as well laugh at em.