Members LanEvo Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bikehorn so, while i'm not terribly sure about this, i may have to actually force some "not being a nice guy". The point isn't to be a dick. Just don't be overly attentive. Ever notice how when you've already got a steady girlfriend, all these other chicks come out of the woodwork who are now suddenly interested? I think it's because when you're already with someone you put out an "I'm not interested" vibe. For some reason, that seems irresistable to women. They run away from guys that seem too eager. I bet if you went out and found some other girl on campus and started casually dating her, then BOTH of the two women you mentioned in your first post would be all over you. Once you stop paying them attention, they figure you must have something going on that they're missing. Emre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members basshunter Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bnyswonger Just be yourself...it's a zen thing, you pursue & obsess & you're dead meat. When you look away, the right girl will appear. I'm going to have to agree with Bob (again) on this one. You never find the right girl when you are looking for her...you find her when you are in the bathroom at the bar, you look out the window and see the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. She walks away, you sigh. You go back and sit down with your beer. The voice from behind you says "is anyone sitting her?" and you turn around and its her. Or any number of other seemingly improbable occurances. But it always hits when yoiu aren't looking. Stop worrying about it and go have fun, that's what you are supposed to be doing at this time in your life... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members T. Alan Smith Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Yeah, OK...but I bet that's something you guys started doing together after you were already an item. That's not the kind of thing you do with someone who sees you as just a friend that you're trying to turn into a girlfriend. Emre Well, yeah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bikehorn Posted November 7, 2005 Author Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Dude...WTF is the matter with you? You go clothes shopping with her? Are you f-ing kidding me? well, it was only once or twice, there were other people with us and i needed a new pair of jeans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Kin Corn Karn Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by Meotch What's a bad ticker? "Sin City"-ese for heart trouble Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members B-Bottom Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by basshunter I'm going to have to agree with Bob (again) on this one. You never find the right girl when you are looking for her...you find her when you are in the bathroom at the bar What kind of bars are you hanging out in? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members KeroseneTrewthe Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by FreestyleIntruder tactical error dude Holy Crap! Pop outta nose! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members pope_face Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 I'm not as experianced as most people, but yeah, relationships are {censored}ed up. I wasn't in one for a few months, just dickin' about. Then I asked a friend of a friend out on a date, and that same week I had one girl ask me out and actually started seeing another. Nothing came out of the two second relationships, and I want to take the first girl out again, but sometimes it's just wierd and comes right out at ya. But, I do agree with the whole telling girls that you like them. {censored}, I used to be so unconfident. Then... just talking to people and taking vocal lessons and all upped my confidence, so now if I like a girl I'll tell her. Most of them are actually interested, if even a little. They're not as evil as they come off. You should be able to get at least one date out of them if you ask. Just tell them their gorgeous and that you honestly like them and ask if they'd like to go for dinner with you. If it happens, great. If not, you wouldn't have been happy anyways. Philly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tommy Gunz Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bikehorn Honors BA in History at Trent. Way to go! But I'd bet that T.O suburb suddently don't seem so bad comparing to the insipid Peterborough eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Super_Donut_Man Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Dude...WTF is the matter with you? You go clothes shopping with her? Are you f-ing kidding me? Do you have pillow fights and braid each others hair, too? Thats too funny Sorry to hear that, I was there for a while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members venturawest Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 dude, the bottom line is this: women are liars, cheats, and untrustworthy whores - just like most men. move on, and don't make the same mistakes again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bbl Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Women like the chase. That is all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bender69 Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Ever notice how when you've already got a steady girlfriend, all these other chicks come out of the woodwork who are now suddenly interested? I think it's because when you're already with someone you put out an "I'm not interested" vibe. For some reason, that seems irresistable to women. They run away from guys that seem too eager.Emre It's because they're curious what your woman sees in you, and that you might be a real catch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bikehorn Posted November 7, 2005 Author Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by Tommy Gunz Way to go! But I'd bet that T.O suburb suddently don't seem so bad comparing to the insipid Peterborough eh? haha, I still don't miss Woodbridge. The girls at Trent are mostly cool. i was amazed when i discovered that there are after all hot girls that you can indeed have an intelligent conversation with. i always used to hear about that but never believed it to be true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Benjamin Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Gotta get your c0ck out more often Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members More Cowbell Posted November 8, 2005 Members Share Posted November 8, 2005 Well, I know how you feel. My best friend is a girl. We do everything together...We eat the same food.."hey, lets go get JBC'S"...We listen to the same music..."Nice metallica T-shirt..i'm wearing mine, too"....Play music..."you play the tuba in band class? so do I!" it was just weird. we like all the same stuff, we go to every concert together...we go on trips for the weekend together and stuff. It's really great to have such a close friend. It's just too bad she's such an amazing girl. Then all our friends and parents decide we would be right for each other, and are very vocal about it. This doesn't help matters. Truth of it all...i'm totally in love with her and she doesn't reciprocate those feelings. She doesn't know the extent of my feelings towards her, and that's cool. I'd still rather have a best friend like her than no friend at all. And any time we're together, she always mentions just how great we get along and how it's always fun when we're with each other. Which is what you'd want with a friend. Yesterday, i heard the story of how she got with her roommate. I gave her honest advice about the situation and tried to get on with my night. It's been tough for me, but i get through it. I'm just still trying to fall out of love. The one thing that keeps me going is the thought that whoever it is that comes into my life will be more fun, more exciting, more everything than my best friend. If not, i'm just settling. So that day will come when this whole stupid love thing gets back on track. Now I'm in school, and I honestly have no care in the world towards any of the girls here. I just don't like them. And guess what...in class, i've got 4 girls that just hover around me and poke me, and smile at me and ask me to go to the bar with them at night...I'm the big challenge in the class. One girl, back a few months ago, told me that I was a fun challenge at first, and now I'm just impossible, and that because of that, she's obsessed with me. It creepsme out sometimes, but women are freaking hard to understand. Oy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members yossarian Posted November 8, 2005 Members Share Posted November 8, 2005 I see two solutions to your problem: 1) Voice your intentions right away. Within your first few encounters make it clear that you find her attractive and don't try to be friends. Ladder jumping never works. 2) Eliminate Donnie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LanEvo Posted November 8, 2005 Members Share Posted November 8, 2005 Bottom line: if a chick is interested in you physically/sexually you two wouldn't be "just friends" in the first place. If she wants to be "just friends," then she's obviously not hot for you and she'll never go out with you no matter how hard you try. There's no need to waste your time. So, I agree with the "ladder theory" advice. Might as well come right out of the gate and make it clear that you're interested in her as a girlfriend...take it or leave it. If she's not interested now, then she'll never be...so don't bother "being friends" hoping you can get her to come around later. It'll never happen. Drop her and move on. Emre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members der oxenrig Posted November 8, 2005 Members Share Posted November 8, 2005 Originally posted by Benjamin Gotta get your c0ck out more often Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Author Craig Vecchione Posted November 8, 2005 CMS Author Share Posted November 8, 2005 +1 to all the "ladder jumping" advice, etc. What I've learned over these many years.....never hesitate. If you're attracted to her, ask her out right then and there. Don't waste time discussing 'feelings' or your mutual friends, it'll just land you smack into the "friends" ladder...that stuff's for much later....sometime between when the sex gets boring and you finally get her annoying face out of your life. And never forget the immortal words of Eddie Murphy: "No matter how hot she is, somewhere there's a guy who's sick of her bull{censored}". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Kaesh Posted November 8, 2005 Members Share Posted November 8, 2005 Look. If you ask her about it there are three things that can happen:a) She'll simply refuse and insist you stay being friends. This is the worst that can happen, because you'll probably have troubles resisting that offer. However, you must do exactly that, because if you don't, it will only get worse, and if you stick to your guns you will gain some respect in her eyes at the very least.b) She'll refuse and be all messed up about it. This is very unlikely, and if it WILL happen the messed up state will likely pass in a matter of minutes or at most a day. See option a on what to do further. c) She'll accept. This is not very likely, but such girls do exist (lug will tell you about it). If she accepts just because she was surprised, then probably it won't be anything past a date or few. If not, you can consider yourself extremely lucky and should pursue your relationship. No matter the out, you'll feel better about it than you're feeling now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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