Members bikehorn Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 I never, ever imagined i'd be posting one of these threads, but, how the times have changed.... So, i've been at university for about 2 months now. I live on campus. generally speaking, my life is presently more fun than a barrel of monkeys. well, before i left home, i had long ago given up on relationships because girls in my particular Toronto suburb are predominantly annoying, bratty upper-middle class kids who have never been told the word "no". i'd seen my friends - their girlfriends were all a goddamn investment and if you ask me, not particularly enjoyable to hang out with. not hugely bright, original or anything similarly unique. faces in the crowd, although i should say that they were mostly incredibly attractive italian girls. i decided i would wait till university instead of wasting time/energy/money on some immature girl who i wasn't really all that into. So, here i am. my residence is about 400 students divded into 8 sections known as "houses" each containing rougly 50. the idea is to create groups of people who know each other better than one gigantic mess of a building. Just about everyone in my "house" is really cool and we're all friends - and therein lies the problem. I liked the girl who lived next door to me(well, 2 doors over but the guy between us is either a hermit or a ghost - doesn't interact or show his face much) but then we became like...best friends. then i found out she's head over heels for a close buddy of mine(he lives upstairs) and they're both too afraid of {censored}ing something up to just drop the BS and get together. so, now i've become kind of her "big brother she never had" and she spills out her problems to me - not what i had in mind when i first got here, but okay, cool now. clearly off limits, we even talked about it. I started to like another girl who lives on the other side of my floor. well, the inevitable happened and we became best friends...also friends with the other girl i liked. seriously she was just about the right girl for me. i bend over backwards for her...i fixed her computer twice, just do a bunch of random crap for her and the other night i pulled an all nighter with her to help her out with a history essay she was way behind on and due to hand in the next afternoon. i practically wrote the essay myself because i felt terrible that she was going to get late marks or maybe a zero for something that counted for 15% of her grade in that class when she was otherwise on top of things. she's a lot like me...we listen to the same music, share views on a lot of things and whatever, etc. we get drunk together, and i buy her alcohol(her money, of course) too because even though we're both underage, i don't get carded at the liquor store. we get stoned together(with my bong, i should add) and sit outside staring at the sky, or sit in my room after smoking up and listen to some of my vinyls. i even go clothes shopping with her because i'm the only straight guy she knows who will since i don't always want to look like a transient. i figured that maybe if i played it cool, i might maybe be able to enter into a relationship with her, y'know? i mean, jeez, she's beautiful, intelligent, witty and enjoys a certain green substance same as i do. she doesn't yet know how i feel about her. what more could a guy ask for? was it too good to be true? yes, it certainly was. about a week ago i was talking to laura(the girl who lives 2 doors over) after a party. we were both about at the end of sobering up from a fun night of being drunk and stoned. as usual, we were talking about how she doesn't know how to talk to Donnie(my friend on the floor above me whos she's infatuated with) and told me things had gotten a little more complicated. as it turned out, Devin(the girl on my floor i've been wanting to get together with) is also attracted to Donnie. they had a talk about it. i kind of was in semi denial, i guess i figured she knew Laura was all over Donnie and so would just not bother. then tonight we were sitting up in Donnie's room(he has a double room and his roommate was watching too), about 5 or 6 of us sitting and watching Boondock Saints. just before the movie started she said she was cold. so Donnie offered the use of his blanket, which was gentlemanly of him except that he was already using it by watching the movie from his bed! so they shared a blanket and a pillow. as soon as i saw that, it was like a huge toilet flushed in my mind. kablam. denial came back and bit me in the ass. i left...it was 2:30 AM and i figured by saying i was tired i'd have a bulletproof excuse. it's not liek i'd have been paying attention to the movie. i can't be mad at my friend either...he is after all my friend and just as single as i am. he's confident and i'm not...if he's got more game than i do then i guess that's genetics for you. starting from scratch, again. story of my goddamn life. i {censored}ing knew this crap would happen to me. 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Members mcantafi Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Hey man. I don't know if you want advice or anything, but I'll give you some anyway. I've been a strip club DJ for about three years now and in that time I think I've learned a fair amount about women (just getting off shift now - who hangs out at strip clubs at two thirty in the morning on a Sunday anyways?), seeing as they are constantly griping about their lives to me. Anyways, you're way too nice. That's it. Don't rush to a woman's aid the second they ask for help. If you have, or pretend to have something better to do, you won't be taken advantage of. Also . . . relax, you're young dude. Play music, ignore chicks, and they will come to you. Trust me. I never used to be any good with chicks either, but I don't seem to have any problems now. If you like a girl, tell her she's a fox right away. Flattery will get you everywhere. Be flirty. Forget about these chicks, they're a lost cause for you now. Leave em alone, and in a few months if they're interested they'll be there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tommy Gunz Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 no worries buddy, you got lots of time. btw, which school and what program are you doing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tim in WV Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 dont even bother trying relationships until you're about 25. Girlz are too much trouble until then. If one cottons up to you, tell her up front all you want is to {censored} like bunnies, and she'll either let you or not, but nobody's ready at your age to have any sort of "relationship" beyond hanging out and the every so often tryst. Wait until you know want you want out of life before you even start to give a {censored} about anything else. And if you dont know, start figuring it out. Youth is wasted on the young. Don't allow 20 years to get behind you in the meantime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members T. Alan Smith Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 What THEY said! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jazz Ad Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 If you want to get girls, you have to ask them out. Did you ? It's as simple as that. Don't lose your time overthinking and phantasmazing.It's not like you're going to marry them, yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members FreestyleIntruder Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bikehorn i bend over backwards for her... tactical error dude Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members NeonVomit Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 If you're too nice, it never works. If a girl feels like she can control you, she never, ever will ever go out with you. 100% guaranteed. Girls like to be challenged. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members FreestyleIntruder Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by NeonVomit If you're too nice, it never works. If a girl feels like she can control you, she never, ever will ever go out with you. 100% guaranteed. Girls like to be challenged. Yeah, women are like horses - you chase them and they run away, but if you turn the other way they follow you out of curiosity. I've been ignoring this one girl for about 7 years now, it must be driving her mad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bnyswonger Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Just be yourself...it's a zen thing, you pursue & obsess & you're dead meat. When you look away, the right girl will appear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jonny Five Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Don't write those two girls off yet. I'm currently dating (and extremely happy with) a girl I was best friends with. We met, hated eachother, became best friends. I'd gripe to her about girls i was head over heels about, and she'd do the same with guys. We were friends for around a year and a half. This year, it started out the same, and then I realized that I really was comfortable with her, and i made a move. She was weirded out at first, but then she came to the same realization. I can honestly say it's the best relationship I've been in. If it's you're first year of college, you've got a lot of time. It sounds like you're looking for a serious relationship, not just some random play. Give it time. Even if you are mature enough to settle down, most girls you meet at your age probably won't be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mike fitzwell Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bnyswonger Just be yourself...it's a zen thing, you pursue & obsess & you're dead meat. When you look away, the right girl will appear. Once again, Bob is full of useful info. A big +1! Worked for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members vigilante76 Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 A good read. http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members FreestyleIntruder Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 wow - never seen that before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DerekDRP Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bikehorn I never, ever imagined i'd be posting one of these threads, but, how the times have changed....So, i've been at university for about 2 months now. I live on campus. generally speaking, my life is presently more fun than a barrel of monkeys. well, before i left home, i had long ago given up on relationships because girls in my particular Toronto suburb are predominantly annoying, bratty upper-middle class kids who have never been told the word "no". i'd seen my friends - their girlfriends were all a goddamn investment and if you ask me, not particularly enjoyable to hang out with. not hugely bright, original or anything similarly unique. faces in the crowd, although i should say that they were mostly incredibly attractive italian girls. i decided i would wait till university instead of wasting time/energy/money on some immature girl who i wasn't really all that into.So, here i am. my residence is about 400 students divded into 8 sections known as "houses" each containing rougly 50. the idea is to create groups of people who know each other better than one gigantic mess of a building. Just about everyone in my "house" is really cool and we're all friends - and therein lies the problem.I liked the girl who lived next door to me(well, 2 doors over but the guy between us is either a hermit or a ghost - doesn't interact or show his face much) but then we became like...best friends. then i found out she's head over heels for a close buddy of mine(he lives upstairs) and they're both too afraid of {censored}ing something up to just drop the BS and get together. so, now i've become kind of her "big brother she never had" and she spills out her problems to me - not what i had in mind when i first got here, but okay, cool now. clearly off limits, we even talked about it.I started to like another girl who lives on the other side of my floor. well, the inevitable happened and we became best friends...also friends with the other girl i liked. seriously she was just about the right girl for me. i bend over backwards for her...i fixed her computer twice, just do a bunch of random crap for her and the other night i pulled an all nighter with her to help her out with a history essay she was way behind on and due to hand in the next afternoon. i practically wrote the essay myself because i felt terrible that she was going to get late marks or maybe a zero for something that counted for 15% of her grade in that class when she was otherwise on top of things. she's a lot like me...we listen to the same music, share views on a lot of things and whatever, etc. we get drunk together, and i buy her alcohol(her money, of course) too because even though we're both underage, i don't get carded at the liquor store. we get stoned together(with my bong, i should add) and sit outside staring at the sky, or sit in my room after smoking up and listen to some of my vinyls. i even go clothes shopping with her because i'm the only straight guy she knows who will since i don't always want to look like a transient. i figured that maybe if i played it cool, i might maybe be able to enter into a relationship with her, y'know? i mean, jeez, she's beautiful, intelligent, witty and enjoys a certain green substance same as i do. she doesn't yet know how i feel about her. what more could a guy ask for? was it too good to be true?yes, it certainly was.about a week ago i was talking to laura(the girl who lives 2 doors over) after a party. we were both about at the end of sobering up from a fun night of being drunk and stoned. as usual, we were talking about how she doesn't know how to talk to Donnie(my friend on the floor above me whos she's infatuated with) and told me things had gotten a little more complicated. as it turned out, Devin(the girl on my floor i've been wanting to get together with) is also attracted to Donnie. they had a talk about it. i kind of was in semi denial, i guess i figured she knew Laura was all over Donnie and so would just not bother. then tonight we were sitting up in Donnie's room(he has a double room and his roommate was watching too), about 5 or 6 of us sitting and watching Boondock Saints. just before the movie started she said she was cold. so Donnie offered the use of his blanket, which was gentlemanly of him except that he was already using it by watching the movie from his bed! so they shared a blanket and a pillow. as soon as i saw that, it was like a huge toilet flushed in my mind. kablam. denial came back and bit me in the ass. i left...it was 2:30 AM and i figured by saying i was tired i'd have a bulletproof excuse. it's not liek i'd have been paying attention to the movie. i can't be mad at my friend either...he is after all my friend and just as single as i am. he's confident and i'm not...if he's got more game than i do then i guess that's genetics for you.starting from scratch, again. story of my goddamn life. i {censored}ing knew this crap would happen to me. Wear my shoes for a weak, and your love life will be of roses and flowers I will guarantee this. Becuase every time I met a girl start to go out with her, it would only last a week or so becuase they do not like guy's with bad tickers. So cheer the heck up all ready be glad you don't have a {censored}ing bad ticker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LanEvo Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by bikehorn i even go clothes shopping with her because i'm the only straight guy she knows who will.Dude...WTF is the matter with you? You go clothes shopping with her? Are you f-ing kidding me? Do you have pillow fights and braid each others hair, too? No wonder you're "just friends." You might think that girls want a guy who's all touchy feely and "there for them" and all that...but they really want a guy to be a guy. Ever notice how all the really hot chicks are banging obnoxious a-holes that treat them like crap? Girls say they want a guy to be their best friend...but they always go for cavemen. Emre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Meotch Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 What's a bad ticker? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members B-Bottom Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Dude...WTF is the matter with you? You go clothes shopping with her? Are you f-ing kidding me? Do you have pillow fights and braid each others hair, too? No wonder you're "just friends." You might think that girls want a guy who's all touchy feely and "there for them" and all that...but they really want a guy to be a guy. Ever notice how all the really hot chicks are banging obnoxious a-holes that treat them like crap? Girls say they want a guy to be their best friend...but they always go for cavemen. Emre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members T. Alan Smith Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Dude...WTF is the matter with you? You go clothes shopping with her? Are you f-ing kidding me? Do you have pillow fights and braid each others hair, too? I love going clothes shopping with my wife. I did with my old girlfriend too. It's style & design...closely related to music. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DerekDRP Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by Meotch What's a bad ticker? A bad heart, I had it sense birth nothing I can doa bout it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DerekDRP Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by T. Alan Smith I love going clothes shopping with my wife. I did with my old girlfriend too. It's style & design...closely related to music. Just don't let your wife meet your girlfriend Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bikehorn Posted November 7, 2005 Author Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by Tommy Gunz btw, which school and what program are you doing? Honors BA in History at Trent. Originally posted by Tim in WV dont even bother trying relationships until you're about 25. Girlz are too much trouble until then. If one cottons up to you, tell her up front all you want is to fuck like bunnies, and she'll either let you or not, but nobody's ready at your age to have any sort of "relationship" beyond hanging out and the every so often tryst. er, relationship might have been a bad term to use on my part. i just wanted to hang out with her a little more closely and maybe share a bed. a small bed. it's not like i have illusions of spending my life with her and getting married and all that jazz. i know people like that. it's annoying and freaks me out a little. besides, with my luck, it would take major alcohol for a girl to cotton up to me... Originally posted by bnyswonger Just be yourself...it's a zen thing, you pursue & obsess & you're dead meat. When you look away, the right girl will appear. the thing is, i've kind of been myself for the past little bit here. the general consensus, both here and with some girls i've talked to about this is that i'm too damned nice to girls. so, while i'm not terribly sure about this, i may have to actually force some "not being a nice guy". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members FreestyleIntruder Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 'Be Yourself' is great advice if your default personality is warm and charming. If you're obnoxious, sarcastic, cynical and flippant then being yourself is probably about the worst thing you could possibly do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LanEvo Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by T. Alan Smith I love going clothes shopping with my wife. I did with my old girlfriend too. It's style & design...closely related to music. Yeah, OK...but I bet that's something you guys started doing together after you were already an item. That's not the kind of thing you do with someone who sees you as just a friend that you're trying to turn into a girlfriend. Emre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DerekDRP Posted November 7, 2005 Members Share Posted November 7, 2005 Originally posted by LanEvo Yeah, OK...but I bet that's something you guys started doing together after you were already an item. That's not the kind of thing you do with someone who sees you as just a friend that you're trying to turn into a girlfriend.Emre I heard all the stories about yeah he was my best friend and I just relized "he's the one" after like 5 years. or I heard he's my best friend and now he gone and married, I do relize he could have had me and now I'am sad. See what I'am getting at? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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