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OT: Fat friend needs an intervention.

mike.sartori

By mike.sartori
in Effects and Processors

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amaleelake Newbie

amaleelake

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Although some of these posts are pretty funny, I am sure it is not exactly the kind of advice that you were looking for, so I will attempt something serious even though I am still laughing at the comments made so far :lol:

I can have some sympathy for this guy, as food can be an additcion just like anything else, but there is a line that needs to be drawn as far as personal responsibility goes.

Anyway, I think that the way most interventions work is that you have to really be ready to be hard on him. You basically have to tell him that either he starts changing his habits or you can't be in his life anymore because you can't stand to see him do this to himself. It has to be tough and it has to be real. You absolutley have to follow through with what you say otherwise he will never take you seriously and just continue to try to get away with his behavior around you (kind of like a child). Addicts are VERY manipulative and they are good at it so you have to be strong.

Maybe you are not ready for a real intervention yet. If you can't stick by what you say about not being in his life unless he makes a change then it is better that you try something else first.

In this case I would suggest talking with his friends and just making it a point to make the guy feel uncomfortable to act out his overeating in front of you. Make it a point to talk about how much fun you had playing sports, hiking, being active, etc. with all of his other friends in front of him so that he realizes that he could be living much fuller life if he had the option of using his body any way he wanted to. Basically don't coddle him, be a little tough on him.

------OR-----

Just let him live his life exactly how he wants to live it. Maybe he truly is happier being able to eat the way that he wants to than to be healthy by societies standards. It is his life and his body to do with what he pleases. Who can really say what is best for someone else? Respecting the idea that he is capable of making his own decisions for his life is also an option.....

Good luck! :)

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NickCaveFan Newbie

NickCaveFan

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Although some of these posts are pretty funny, I am sure it is not exactly the kind of advice that you were looking for, so I will attempt something serious even though I am still laughing at the comments made so far
:lol:

Good luck!
:)



Some good advice. He's not going to stop his addiction until he is ready to. You can't make him, and very little if anything you say will change him. He has to change the view of himself. He honestly doesn't see himself as fat. He'll probably need to have something traumatic happen to lead him to believe he needs to change. Not get that promotion, depressed because he can't get a girl friend, or something. A therapist and psychologist can help a lot, but you have to be careful. Its not like heroin or alcohol, he'll still have to eat the rest of his life.

For now, just be his friend. And not hanging around him when he eats enormous amounts, or leaving when he begins to, will start to send the message it isn't acceptable. Don't nag or rant. Let your actions do the talking.

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Kikaruu Newbie

Kikaruu

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..:Man, I'm trying to imagine how it must feel to be him. A vicious cycle.

..:I am not poking fun, although I've been laughing for the past five minutes at all of these posts. I am saying, though, that I'd be looking into why he does what he does. Double-Stuf Oreos in a serving bowl full of milk? Beautifully decadent, and in both senses. Maybe he just doesn't care..?

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L_Z_nut Newbie

L_Z_nut

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Well, I think he's just trying to be a success in other areas of his life, and ignore the weight. He's really career driven, and he just got a huge promotion, but it definitely seems like that's made him even more lax physically, and nutritionally.


Should I stop calling him Fatty McFat-Fat?

 

 

:lol: And some of you still think this thread is serious.

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mike.sartori Newbie

mike.sartori

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:lol:
And some of you still think this thread is serious.



He and I have a unique relationship. He's not like some fat guys. I had a fat roommate for a year in school, he just wanted everyone to accept him the way he was, and if anyone said anything about his weight, he was all :cry::cry::cry:.

My friend that we are discussing, brings up the fact that he is fat like it's something he's just uber proud of. He's the classic fat funny guy. I think he's probably afraid to lose his identity or something, but he is Waaaaaay fatter than he used to be.

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L_Z_nut Newbie

L_Z_nut

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So he's the cool fat friend.

 

I have a fat friend who's more confident than some of my skinny, and in shape friends. In fact he gets more ladies as well... really hot ones to boot. He's probably around 80-90lbs overweight, but he's a {censored}ing powerhouse, he's got tons of energy, and he's funny as hell.

 

But seriously though, pushing 500lbs, even if he's the greatest, and bestest friend in the world, that's just not right. Unless he's like 8ft tall.... is he 8ft tall?

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mike.sartori Newbie

mike.sartori

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So he's the cool fat friend.


I have a fat friend who's more confident than some of my skinny, and in shape friends. In fact he gets more ladies as well... really hot ones to boot. He's probably around 80-90lbs overweight, but he's a {censored}ing powerhouse, he's got tons of energy, and he's funny as hell.


But seriously though, pushing 500lbs, even if he's the greatest, and bestest friend in the world, that's just not right. Unless he's like 8ft tall.... is he 8ft tall?

 

 

He's 6'4" - so it was cool when he was like 350 lbs., but now it's just getting ridiculous.

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mike.sartori Newbie

mike.sartori

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Sorry to derail the thread, but I just thought of something. How do you guys feel about morbidly obese people getting handicapped placards? I think it's a tremendous load of horse{censored}.
:idea:



They should give them obese placards, and make them park in the farthest away spot possible.

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Coma Larkin Newbie

Coma Larkin

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Hey Mike--you DO know that I post here, too, right? When you and David first approached me at the beginning of last year about dropping the lbs, I laughed because we were all sharing an XL pizza and 2 pitchers of beer at the time. Then later, David told me you were serious and had talked to him about it beforehand. I was pissed and hurt, but I let it go.

 

You've dropped not-so-subtle hints quite a few times, and I've taken them all in stride. Yes, I know that I need to lose weight. Yes, I know my eating habits aren't healthy. But this was the WRONG way to go about it.

 

I eat when I'm stressed. And when I find out my best friend is asking for advice on how to make me skinny on a guitar effects forum THAT I ALSO POST ON, it stresses me more. This doesn't help the situation at all.

 

By the way, I'm not the one who drinks a two-liter of Coke every three days. Please talk to me in person and not here.

 

Jesse

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