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I just had sex


bluehuricane

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Guy walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. Bartender lines them up and as he's pouring he asks "what are you celebrating?" Guy responds "My first blowjob!" Bartender replies "That's awesome - congratulations! Let me make it 11, last one's on the house!"

"That's okay" the guy responds. "If 10 shots don't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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A man walks into a bar and pauses: at the other end of the bar, there's this guy with a big orange for a head. Just kind of sitting there, mooning into his drink. So the man asks the bartender, "Say, what's up with the guy with the big orange for a head?" And the bartender says, "It's an interesting story. Buy him a drink and maybe he'll tell it to you."

So the man walks over and introduces himself and offers to buy a round. The guy with the big orange for a head says, "Yeah, I'll bet you want to know the story, huh?" To which the man replies, "Sure, if you don't mind."

The man with the big orange for a head sighs and says, "I was walking along the beach one day, when I stubbed my toe on something. I looked down, and there was an antique brass lamp. I picked it up and dusted it off a little -- when all of a sudden this enormous genie pops out!

"The genie thundered, 'You have released me from my ten-thousand year imprisonment, and I am in your debt. I will grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude.'

The man at the bar is agape. The guy with the big orange for a head continues: "So I said, 'Wow, okay. Well, my first wish is to be fantastically wealthy.'

"The genie says, 'Your wish is granted.' And all of a sudden I have rings on my fingers and a crown on my head, and my wallet is full of money and a dozen ATM cards and the deed to a mansion in the hills -- I mean, I was loaded!

"So I said, 'Amazing! Okay, for my next wish , I want to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world.'

"The genie says, 'Your wish is granted.' And the ocean parts, and out walks this gorgeous woman in this beautiful dress, and she takes my hand and we fall in love and the genie marries us right there. It was incredible.

"The genie booms, 'You have one wish remaining.'"

The man with the big orange for a head pauses and sips his beer and says,

































































I wish I had a big orange for a head.

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Quote Originally Posted by fuzzio View Post
Is it a pun?
No - it's funny because the whole joke is set up like one of those jokes that ends with a funny pun or mispronunciation (see the "10 Inch Pianist" joke), but then turns out to be something simple (and a bit unexpected. Kind of like this one:

Guy sits down on a plane and notices the guy next to him has a black eye. "Wow - that's quite a shiner. What happened to you?"
Other guy responds "It's really embarrassing. I was at the ticket counter and the woman there had these magnificent breasts. I was so distracted I asked for a "picket to Tittsburgh" and she punched me in the face!"

The first guy says "Don't feel bad. I'm a psychologist and that's what we call a "Freudian slip." It can be a little embarrassing, but it's common and perfectly normal. Why just the other day I was sitting down for breakfast with my wife. I meant to say 'please pass the milk, dear," but what came out instead was 'you stupid b**ch*, you ruined my life!'"
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No - it's funny because the whole joke is set up like one of those jokes that ends with a funny pun or mispronunciation (see the "10 Inch Pianist" joke), but then turns out to be something simple (and a bit unexpected. Kind of like this one:


Guy sits down on a plane and notices the guy next to him has a black eye. "Wow - that's quite a shiner. What happened to you?"

Other guy responds "It's really embarrassing. I was at the ticket counter and the woman there had these magnificent breasts. I was so distracted I asked for a "picket to Tittsburgh" and she punched me in the face!"


The first guy says "Don't feel bad. I'm a psychologist and that's what we call a "Freudian slip." It can be a little embarrassing, but it's common and perfectly normal. Why just the other day I was sitting down for breakfast with my wife. I meant to say 'please pass the milk, dear," but what came out instead was 'you stupid b**ch*, you ruined my life!'"

 

I don't get it. Do I need to dust off the old RHYMEX algorithm?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PS

 

:lol:

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