Members theGhost Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 In the Song of Solomon, the Bible describes the act of fisting and the profound erotic bliss it induces: It is the voice of my beloved! He knocks, saying, "Open for me, my sister, my love, My dove, my perfect one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members deadpoet086 Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Regardless if the quotes were taken out of context(which I'm sure they were) that site is hilarious and whoever created it is utterly ridiculous Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MetalStrm Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 You can twist words to make them say whatever you want them too... especially when you decide to exclude verses on a whim to make things fit what you're trying to say. case in point is above. although the Song of Solomon is an extremely controversial book of the bible, it's not as if that passage has any remote connection to fisting. here is the entire passage that those verses come from, including the verses previously excluded (v.3) and going on to the end of the passage (v.8). Song of Solomon 5:2-8 (New International Version) Beloved 2 I slept but my heart was awake. Listen! My lover is knocking: "Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my flawless one. My head is drenched with dew, my hair with the dampness of the night." 3 I have taken off my robe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Fender Picker Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Holy {censored}! That sounds totally like porn poetry to me! No. Not porn. It's the way sex was ment to be. Between one man and one woman who are married to each other. FP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sgt. Funk Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 If its not legal, you can always. . you know. . edit the bible. Its kinda like Wikipedia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members theGhost Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 If its not legal, you can always. . you know. . edit the bible. Its kinda like Wikipedia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MetalStrm Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Hey dudes, it's alright, I know that it wasn't probably meant as porn But that site sure is hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JoshuaLogan Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 No. Not porn. It's the way sex was ment to be. Between one man and one woman who are married to each other. FP I lol'd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members olejason Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 No. Not porn. It's the way sex was ment to be. Between one man and one woman who are married to each other. FP Solomon was all about being with only one woman who he was married to, right? Give me a break. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members myway Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 NOpe, this is just wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members reddt1 Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Holy crap (pun intended), that site is freaking hilarious!! I can't help thinking it's some dude's desperate attempt to con his frigid ultra-religious wife into a threesome with the church secretary. "No really honey - it's says right here on this reputable website that it's okay!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bumble Posted June 16, 2007 Author Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Holy crap (pun intended), that site is freaking hilarious!! I can't help thinking it's some dude's desperate attempt to con his frigid ultra-religious wife into a threesome with the church secretary."No really honey - it's says right here on this reputable website that it's okay!" Gotta say that's the first thing that came to mind as well. If not, well, it certainly is the perfect tool! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wisewendell Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 wow dude... good one and as an outspoken and unashamed Christian... I have to say that this is just ridiculous. +1 gazillion Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gibbed Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 threesomes are nice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blckbldng Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 what about that quote from jesus :"Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members stephen sawall Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Father ,Son , Holly Goat, Being a heathan and all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Armitage Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 If Jesus is always there with you, doesn't that make EVERY time you've had sex a threesome? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dave Owens Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Well what about this then:Fisting and God's WillThe sex act called fisting is a source of confusion and misconceptions for many Christians. This is unfortunate, because it means that many Christian men and women are depriving themselves of what could be the most spiritual sexual experience of their lives. Like anal sex and BDSM, fisting is often mistakenly associated with the gay community or is considered a sex act too extreme to be appropriate for Christian couples. Not only are these views incorrect, but fisting actually has a scriptural precedent, as we will show. I watched my x-Wife fist her sister..its not that big a deal.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members eric_kv2 Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Hahahahaha This has got to be one of the best threads ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MetalStrm Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 I did scat sex with your ex too. Poo'ed all over her {censored} and then double fisted the {censored} right inside of her. It was the ultimate spiritual experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RhettHours Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 where's that at again? oh yea... and the song of solomon quote is taken entirely out of context. HAHA...nonono...what cracks me up about "out of context" is when they're talking about spilling the seed on the ground...and they're like, "he was copulating with his brothers wife, and his sin was spilling his seed on the ground, rather than her swallowing it." You suuure the sin wasn't him sleeping with his brothers wife? Being adultery? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members 17 Tubes Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 This piec e you quoted should remind us that translations MIGHT be part of theproblem. For example...you quote: "My lover thrust his hand through the latch opening". IS that an accurate translation? A "latch" doesn't really have m,uch of an "opening". I think something is wrong in that translation. Of course....we all take GREAT faith that these ancient writings have been translated as accurately as possible, and being un-edited throughout the dark ages, right? You can twist words to make them say whatever you want them too... especially when you decide to exclude verses on a whim to make things fit what you're trying to say. case in point is above. although the Song of Solomon is an extremely controversial book of the bible, it's not as if that passage has any remote connection to fisting. here is the entire passage that those verses come from, including the verses previously excluded (v.3) and going on to the end of the passage (v.8). Song of Solomon 5:2-8 (New International Version) Beloved 2 I slept but my heart was awake. Listen! My lover is knocking: "Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my flawless one. My head is drenched with dew, my hair with the dampness of the night." 3 I have taken off my robe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thenakedarab Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 Well what about this then: Fisting and God's Will...fisting actually has a scriptural precedent, as we will show. "But honey, God wants me to lube up my fist and shove it up your ass." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Bumble Posted June 16, 2007 Author Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 "But honey, God wants me to lube up my fist and shove it up your ass." Hey, naked arabs are not Christian! Muslim maybe, in which case Mohammed suggests many multisomes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members nerol1st Posted June 16, 2007 Members Share Posted June 16, 2007 lol at this thread. Please don't tell me that people are going to be stupid enough to think this is mainstream christianity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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