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The all newest PWNED/FAIL/FUNNY pictures thread


Cokeman

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Quote Originally Posted by soundgardener75

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He wetted himself. Wondered if he shat too. Poor guy.

 

I guy I used to work with was held up at knifepoint and he started screaming and took off running. He said it was instinct and he didn't even think about saving his wallet - he didn't have any money in there anyway. He got away though. He said he turned around and the would be mugger was running the other way.
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Quote Originally Posted by Miter Gauge

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I guy I used to work with was held up at knifepoint and he started screaming and took off running. He said it was instinct and he didn't even think about saving his wallet - he didn't have any money in there anyway. He got away though. He said he turned around and the would be mugger was running the other way.

 


That is the reason you should use a gun instead of a knife. People will never take their chance if it is a gun.

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Quote Originally Posted by Miter Gauge

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I guy I used to work with was held up at knifepoint and he started screaming and took off running. He said it was instinct and he didn't even think about saving his wallet - he didn't have any money in there anyway. He got away though. He said he turned around and the would be mugger was running the other way.

 

that's my defense too.

*guy walks up to me with a knife*

"Gimme your wallet!!!"


me - "OH MY GOD FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUUUUUNNNNNNN!!!!!!!"

*runs the opposite direction waving arms wildly like a madman*


Either that or "Holy {censored} dude, look at the spider on your shoulder, I'm outta here, {censored} that"

*runs away making Dr. Zoidberg bwooping noises*

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see that's the thing: it depends on the weapon the mugger is using.


If he's got a gun: okay, here's my wallet. No way i'm takin a bullet for 3 bucks and a bank card i'm gonna cancel as soon as the dude leaves.


If he's got a knife: ehh.... Depends on how crazy that mother{censored}er looks. That knife will more than likely give me tetanus at the very least, and if he takes my insurance card, it'll be a lot harder to get it treated.


If he's got a lead pipe: He ain't gettin {censored}. I will break that mother{censored}er in half after i step into his swing and disarm him, rendering his weapon useless.


If he's relying on his fists: I am stealing HIS goddamn wallet. Fights aren't won by speed, strength, size or skill... it's all about who's more willing to permanently {censored} up the other guy. That's me.

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Quote Originally Posted by mrelusive

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see that's the thing: it depends on the weapon the mugger is using.


If he's got a gun: okay, here's my wallet. No way i'm takin a bullet for 3 bucks and a bank card i'm gonna cancel as soon as the dude leaves.


If he's got a knife: ehh.... Depends on how crazy that mother{censored}er looks. That knife will more than likely give me tetanus at the very least, and if he takes my insurance card, it'll be a lot harder to get it treated.


If he's got a lead pipe: He ain't gettin {censored}. I will break that mother{censored}er in half after i step into his swing and disarm him, rendering his weapon useless.


If he's relying on his fists: I am stealing HIS goddamn wallet. Fights aren't won by speed, strength, size or skill... it's all about who's more willing to permanently {censored} up the other guy. That's me.

 

UFC seems to think size matterswink.gif Seriously though, I know what you mean. Even a grizzly bear backs down from a wolverine! Oh, and honey badger don't care either
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Quote Originally Posted by sleewell

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i love how the bald guy in the boat goes down, makes me laugh every time. moron.

 


Is it me or does he look a bit like Joe Satriani? icon_lol.gif



€: Actually no he doesn't. The gifs just have a really low resolution.

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Quote Originally Posted by mrelusive

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see that's the thing: it depends on the weapon the mugger is using.


If he's got a gun: okay, here's my wallet. No way i'm takin a bullet for 3 bucks and a bank card i'm gonna cancel as soon as the dude leaves.


If he's got a knife: ehh.... Depends on how crazy that mother{censored}er looks. That knife will more than likely give me tetanus at the very least, and if he takes my insurance card, it'll be a lot harder to get it treated.


If he's got a lead pipe: He ain't gettin {censored}. I will break that mother{censored}er in half after i step into his swing and disarm him, rendering his weapon useless.


If he's relying on his fists: I am stealing HIS goddamn wallet. Fights aren't won by speed, strength, size or skill... it's all about who's more willing to permanently {censored} up the other guy. That's me.

 

In the self defense training I have taken, my instructors always stressed that if you are defending against someone with a knife..you will more than likely sustain some injury...if they are trained in knife fighting you are basically {censored}ed....so I would be a bit more cautious against a knife.


I have heard freaky stuff...a guy and his girlfriend got into a bit of an arguement....she ends up grabbing a boxcutter...and slashes out at the guy...apparently it cut thought his jacket and across his armpit and unfortunately sliced through a large artery.....he died from bloodloss apparently the cut end of the artery slipped deep inside the tissues in the armpit.....so they ain't as easy to deal with as you might think.

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