Members fling the poo Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 i know a few of us have puked or pissed themselves onstage for various reasons but this happened to me the other night. every year our freinds and family invade a pizza shop or a bar and throw an acoustic show. we've done 12 of them so far. i get hammered, its a party but last year i got too pickled and coudln't play anything but a piss poor GBV cover i convinced myself i could play in the car outside. my own songs were blurs to me this year i took it easy, no whisky no tweeds beforehand. a few beers. but i had gone to the family tamalada and was stuffed. i coudlnt even eat the fancy pants pizza that was pbeing shoved in my face. i'm gluten and lactose intolerant anyways but DAMN i'll suffer for a good slice. so i'm there singing my heart out. all heartburned from the salsa and vegan tamales we were eating and all of a sudden VURP and a hunk of either garlic or onion came out and flew in the soundhole of the guitar. i started laughing, so did my freinds it wasnt embarassing i've done way worse but its been a few times lately. my voice sounded much better after and i was able to hit notes. whats yoru most embarrasing or recoverable vurp/vomit story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members notamachine Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 remind me to sit in the back if I come to see you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ggm1960 Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 You're really setting the bar high! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members strathound Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 I have yet to vomit or spew anything on stage. But there's always hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Richard King Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 Not being a performer, I have never spewed anything on stage before. I did, however, in reading this thread, spew the Coke that I was drinking all over my monitor and keyboard. It sort of tingles coming out your nose. Who do you think is going to clean up this mess that you caused? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hamer_Time Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 That brings up a good question, when does spewed up materials actually become vomit, when it leaves the throat or when it leaves the mouth......if no one is there to see it, is it still vomit?? I am afraid I'll need answers before I can properly participate any further...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators BATCAT Posted December 26, 2007 Moderators Share Posted December 26, 2007 I generally avoid food for three or so hours before singing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members strathound Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 That brings up a good question, when does spewed up materials actually become vomit, when it leaves the throat or when it leaves the mouth......if no one is there to see it, is it still vomit?? I am afraid I'll need answers before I can properly participate any further...... I'm not certified in this topic, but I do believe that vomit has to come from the stomach whereas your general everyday spew can be anything in your mouth at the time of said spewage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fling the poo Posted December 26, 2007 Author Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 I generally avoid food for three or so hours before singing... so do i. actually more. i hate playing with food in me. can't avoid the tamalada tho... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators BATCAT Posted December 26, 2007 Moderators Share Posted December 26, 2007 so do i. actually more. i hate playing with food in me. can't avoid the tamalada tho... When it's free or heavily discounted food, and it's good, sometimes it's really hard to resist, yeah... If the kitchen stays open late enough, I'll sometimes eat right after playing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Roy Brooks Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 I've farted onstage numerous times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fling the poo Posted December 26, 2007 Author Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 When it's free or heavily discounted food, and it's good, sometimes it's really hard to resist, yeah...If the kitchen stays open late enough, I'll sometimes eat right after playing. well the tamalada was a family tamale holiday thing. if food is offered i ask for vegan or or a buyout. usually get the buyout becuase no one wants to deal with the vegan thing. favorite places for rider food. that'd be a thread in itself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Fear My Potato Posted December 26, 2007 Members Share Posted December 26, 2007 Never had an issue onstage... ...when I was giggin in Florida I used to put beer in a nalgene bottle since I wasn't 21. A beer before I went on, then the bottle to nurse me through, and I was a happy singer. There was this one festival we played and I was being slightly more professional than usual and on the last song realized I'd been ignoring the bottle and had half a bottle left of beer (in actuality, probably a beer or two?). Nalgene bottles are bigger than they look. So I finish the last verse and pound it. The song ends. Everything goes ok, until I get out of the lights and man, the world went spinning. Next thing I know I'm half-collapsed against a wall backstage, staring at a Fender twin covered in my vomit. The owner of the amp was damned cool about it. They'd already played so he was content to have me pay for damages and we had a few drinks/smokes later laughing about it. Glad I didn't ruin anyone's gig though...especially my own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Botch Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 I was getting ready to blow a harp solo in a country band years ago. The solo started with a long "draw" note so I blew all the air out of my lungs in prep... I also blew the Bungee Booger from Hell out my nostril. It flew downward, I swear to my knees, and bungee'd back up and landed on the tip of my nose! Gah! I don't think anyone saw what happened, got the offender wiped away pretty quick but I think my solo suffered just a bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TIT0 Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 LOL I haven't had this pleasure, because I don't think I'd ever play a Spanish guitar in front of a crowd. I did play a show where the singer in my band. Puked through a harmonica when playing it, then, blowing through it again after vocals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Nobody Told Me Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 I've puked outside on break or before a show, but never onstage. I did however, damn near {censored} myself onstage one time. All night I'd been having those dangerous farts - you know, the kind where you don't really know if it's safe to fart or if there's some type of liquid or solid involved. So during a particularly demanding vocal part I let another one rip. At first all was well, just passing some gas. But I soon realized that this fart had other plans for me. I was able to shut things down right before disaster struck, but the smell from this particular outgassing was something to behold. What made it really funny was that we had a guest bass player up during this song, and when my vapor of doom/cloud of awesomeness made its' way to his part of the stage, I thought he was going to puke. He had this "I just discovered a dead body" look on his face, and I was laughing so hard that I could hardly play or sing. I'm giggling right now just writing about it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cooterbrown Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 Back in the 80s, I was playing a gig with a horrible case of the creeping crud. While the dance floor was packed, I coughed up a giant loogy that was shaped like a barbell...it flew out of my windpipe...spinning end over end, it was almost like slow motion...until it landed and twisted around in some chick's big 80s hairdo. She had so much hairspray in, she didn't even feel it. ...and I don't think *anybody* saw what I had done, believe it or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tedster Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 I have yet to vomit or spew anything on stage. But there's always hope. I was just gonna say, there are probably a lot of deathcore bands that would give anything to be able to vomit on cue. That's metal! HAHAHAHA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Taylor Davis Posted December 27, 2007 Members Share Posted December 27, 2007 That brings up a good question,if no one is there to see it, is it still vomit?? I am afraid I'll need answers before I can properly participate any further...... If there is no one there to "smell" it do it still "stank"?I have fell off stages, fell down on stages, worked on stages and had money tossed at me on stages but never verped, vomicked or otherwise victim-ised my fellow bandmates or the crowd except for the occasional missed chord or flubbed note. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Fourth stringer Posted December 28, 2007 Members Share Posted December 28, 2007 The drummer in one band I was in came to the gig sick as a dog, but said he was ok to go, but just in case he put a plastic bucket on the floor next to his drums. Sure enough, he had to use it while he was playing and he still kept time...nobody noticed. What was the song.....Celebration. Never one of my favorites. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.