15 things that will pi** a sound guy.

[BillESC]

 

15. When a drunk person I don't know wants to stand next to me and talk to me the

whole time I'm working. I have a job to do which requires concentration and me

paying attention to what's going on and it's a lot harder for me to hear what's

going on in the room when someone is constantly jabbering into one of my ears.

14. When people ask me for a table or try to place a drink order with me. You're

talking to the wrong guy.

13. When people expect me to be as excited to be there as they are. Where this might be their every once-in-a-while night on the town, I do this 3 to 7 nights a week every week. Forgive me if I look bored.

12. When people expect me to want to go to a club on my night off. Can we just go

someplace quiet and peaceful instead?

11. When random people want to tell me how they think it should sound. They don't

know the sound of the room, what the band wants, what the club management or

owners want, or about potential noise complaints from neighbors. And really, I

do this for a living. If you're not the sound guy that's traveling with the band,

keep your amateur opinion to yourself.

10. When people touch my mixing board or audio gear. You can blow up a speaker

or amp or potentially damage someone's hearing. This is expensive equipment so

if you don't own it, don't touch it and keep your drinks away from it.

9. When bands ask me to turn the monitor up. Each monitor is a separate mix. Tell me what instrument or vocal you want to hear in the monitor and I will turn that up for you.

8. When bands tell me they want to hear everything in the monitor. If I put everything in the monitor it's just going to sound like mud because it's a mono mix and everything is on top of each other. How about you tell me the two or three things that are most important for you to hear and we'll start there.

 

7. When bands don't bring what they need to play the show. If you need adapters,

cables, batteries, etc to make your equipment work, bring it and bring backups.

If you break a guitar string, the show can't end because of it. If you need a

special adapter don't expect me to have it. Although you might get lucky and I

do.

6. When bands ask the crowd how it's sounding out there. That's insulting. I do

this for a living.

5. When people call or text me before 10 a.m. I just went to sleep a few hours ago.

4. When a band knows that their set time is up, so they try to get the crowd involved

by asking the crowd if they want to hear one more. I will cut off your mic and

bring the house music up.

3. When you give the band one more song and they try to play two more.

2. When people blame the band's lack of talent or poor equipment on the sound guy.

It's amplified sound. If it sounds like crap, it will be amplified crap.

And the number one is...

1. When people call me a DJ

 

[tlbonehead]

 

---

BillESC wrote:

 

15.

 When a drunk person I don't know wants to stand next to me and talk to me the

 

whole time I'm working. I have a job to do which requires concentration and me

 

paying attention to what's going on and it's a lot harder for me to hear what's

 

going on in the room when someone is constantly jabbering into one of my ears.

14.

 When people ask me for a table or try to place a drink order with me. You're

 

talking to the wrong guy.

13. 

When people expect me to be as excited to be there as they are. Where this might be their every once-in-a-while night on the town, I do this 3 to 7 nights a week every week. Forgive me if I look bored.

12.

 When people expect me to want to go to a club on my night off. Can we just go

 

someplace quiet and peaceful instead?

11.

 When random people want to tell me how they think it should sound. They don't

 

know the sound of the room, what the band wants, what the club management or

 

owners want, or about potential noise complaints from neighbors. And really, I

 

do this for a living. If you're not the sound guy that's traveling with the band,

 

keep your amateur opinion to yourself.

10.

 When people touch my mixing board or audio gear. You can blow up a speaker

 

or amp or potentially damage someone's hearing. This is expensive equipment so

 

if you don't own it, don't touch it and keep your drinks away from it.

9. 

When bands ask me to turn the monitor up. Each monitor is a separate mix. Tell me what instrument or vocal you want to hear in the monitor and I will turn that up for you.

8.

 When bands tell me they want to hear everything in the monitor. If I put everything in the monitor it's just going to sound like mud because it's a mono mix and everything is on top of each other. How about you tell me the two or three things that are most important for you to hear and we'll start there.

 

 

7. 

When bands don't bring what they need to play the show. If you need adapters,

 

cables, batteries, etc to make your equipment work, bring it and bring backups.

 

If you break a guitar string, the show can't end because of it. If you need a

 

special adapter don't expect me to have it. Although you might get lucky and I

 

do.

6. 

When bands ask the crowd how it's sounding out there. That's insulting. I do

 

this for a living.

5.

 When people call or text me before 10 a.m. I just went to sleep a few hours ago.

4.

 When a band knows that their set time is up, so they try to get the crowd involved

 

by asking the crowd if they want to hear one more. I will cut off your mic and

 

bring the house music up.

3.

 When you give the band one more song and they try to play two more.

2. 

When people blame the band's lack of talent or poor equipment on the sound guy.

 

It's amplified sound. If it sounds like crap, it will be amplified crap.

 

And the number one is...

1.

 When people call me a DJ

 

 

---

 

#8 is a really good one. Separation of sound is what makes it easier for a performer to hear things distinctly.

[Audiopile]

When you're test driving a vehicle, and the seller immediately cranks on the vehicle's radio device... and then seems insulted when you ask to turn that gawd-awful noise off (no, I'm not impressed... at all).

[RoadRanger]

 

---

BillESC wrote:

 

13. 

When people expect me to be as excited to be there as they are. Where this might be their every once-in-a-while night on the town, I do this 3 to 7 nights a week every week. Forgive me if I look bored.

---

 

I really try to avoid looking boored or worse as it does affect the talent and audience negatively IME, especially early before the room fills up or if the turnout is low that night.

[Dogoth]

 

---

RoadRanger wrote:

 

---

BillESC wrote:

 

13. 

When people expect me to be as excited to be there as they are. Where this might be their every once-in-a-while night on the town, I do this 3 to 7 nights a week every week. Forgive me if I look bored.

---

 

 

I really try to avoid looking boored or worse as it does affect the talent and audience negatively IME, especially early before the room fills up or if the turnout is low that night.

---

How many times have you ducked your head out of sight for that GIANT yawn.

How often do you applaud the band? I do if I "really" liked them (or their entertainment value - either from the audiences perspective or just mine ;-) but even if I sort of liked them, I just don't feel the need. I at least try and smile and be pleasent even if the group is horrible. It's sort of like customer service where a good waitress still smiles even if her feet hurt and she really doesn't want to be there :-)

[hornplayer]

15.5  Bands that pay no attention to stage volume. Only more me in the monitors and FOH.

[Pro Sound Guy]

When guitar players say there needs to be more guitar in the mix.

When drummers say there should be overwhelming kick in the mix.

When bass players say there should be more bass in the mix.

When doing a bluegrass act banjo players say there should be more banjo when the banjo

is so dam loud over the rest of the acoustic instruments anyways and all the mics on stage pick

the ambient sound of the banjo BESIDES the mic that the banjo is playing in front of.

Then there is the "more me" in the monitor to the point of feedback

[DanBAP]

 

---

hornplayer wrote:

 

 

15.5  Bands that pay no attention to stage volume. Only more me in the monitors and FOH.

---

 

My favorite recently was a keyboard player who said, "I usually mix for us when we bring our own PA. Heads up: none of my keyboard patches are level-matched."

 

I suppose I should be grateful for the warning. :-p

 

-Dan.

[monthlymixcd]

Great list Bill! Number 6 made me lol.

[minn12]

High on my list is when half the band shows up 20 minutes before showtime.  And the drummer is usually one of them.  Puts me in a rush, and tells me they don't care about me or what I need to do as a sound guy. Not the best way to start off the night. 

[JV90]

You also forgot to mention about the people who brings they're cel phones, pen drives, sd card, mini sd card, laptops, even the external hard drives (and insists that they want it to be installed on my laptop wich controls the lights with a software), I mean it's ok when you do have the tools for it, that's why I bought my portable dvd player wich handles usb, but I haved got smart guys who has their backing tracks on a mini sd card wich they take out of his cell phones and insist to use it and get mad because I don't have the mini to sd card adapter, or the ones that comes with the hard drives too when they insist to install on my laptop, I even had one guy that arrived to the venue with an internal ide hard drive wich he want to be installed on my computer on that night for his act; I too become a nazi when the people use the Subs to put it as a side, so any glass of whatever that shows on the Subs it goes on the floor right on immediately, and I don't care if it's the dance floor as well,

[witesol]

yup. or when some guy wanders out with a recording rack .."I'm recording the show, don't worry, I've been doing this for like 3 years...where can I take all the outputs"

 

Video guys can sometimes do that too. "I'm video'ing the show for the band, where can i plug into power and  I need the outputs from the board"  Me: " did you bring cabling? You can't set your tripod there unless you want a video of the back of my head"

I am not responsible for starting your Recorder/Zoom/ Camera, or hitting save at the end of the set. If you're cool, nice and ask in a nice way I probably will help. 

 

 

[Калина]

 

---

BillESC wrote:

 

15.

 When a drunk person I don't know wants to stand next to me and talk to me the

 

whole time I'm working. I have a job to do which requires concentration and me

 

paying attention to what's going on and it's a lot harder for me to hear what's

 

going on in the room when someone is constantly jabbering into one of my ears.

14.

 When people ask me for a table or try to place a drink order with me. You're

 

talking to the wrong guy.

13. 

When people expect me to be as excited to be there as they are. Where this might be their every once-in-a-while night on the town, I do this 3 to 7 nights a week every week. Forgive me if I look bored.

12.

 When people expect me to want to go to a club on my night off. Can we just go

 

someplace quiet and peaceful instead?

11.

 When random people want to tell me how they think it should sound. They don't

 

know the sound of the room, what the band wants, what the club management or

 

owners want, or about potential noise complaints from neighbors. And really, I

 

do this for a living. If you're not the sound guy that's traveling with the band,

 

keep your amateur opinion to yourself.

10.

 When people touch my mixing board or audio gear. You can blow up a speaker

 

or amp or potentially damage someone's hearing. This is expensive equipment so

 

if you don't own it, don't touch it and keep your drinks away from it.

9. 

When bands ask me to turn the monitor up. Each monitor is a separate mix. Tell me what instrument or vocal you want to hear in the monitor and I will turn that up for you.

8.

 When bands tell me they want to hear everything in the monitor. If I put everything in the monitor it's just going to sound like mud because it's a mono mix and everything is on top of each other. How about you tell me the two or three things that are most important for you to hear and we'll start there.

 

 

7. 

When bands don't bring what they need to play the show. If you need adapters,

 

cables, batteries, etc to make your equipment work, bring it and bring backups.

 

If you break a guitar string, the show can't end because of it. If you need a

 

special adapter don't expect me to have it. Although you might get lucky and I

 

do.

6. 

When bands ask the crowd how it's sounding out there. That's insulting. I do

 

this for a living.

5.

 When people call or text me before 10 a.m. I just went to sleep a few hours ago.

4.

 When a band knows that their set time is up, so they try to get the crowd involved

 

by asking the crowd if they want to hear one more. I will cut off your mic and

 

bring the house music up.

3.

 When you give the band one more song and they try to play two more.

2. 

When people blame the band's lack of talent or poor equipment on the sound guy.

 

It's amplified sound. If it sounds like crap, it will be amplified crap.

 

And the number one is...

1.

 When people call me a DJ

 

 

---

 

 

At the point! 

we live in different countries, in different parts of the world, and think alike!

it's nice and fills the heart good