Members neatobassman Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 This girl I've been dating likes to drink. Alot. Like every night gets pretty drunk. I knew her during high school, didn't see her for like 5 years. Found out the other night that during those years she got into coke and E super hard and got super burnt out. To the point where she would do a line and a few pills and would fall asleep. Now I'm thinking this drinking is a manifestation of a bigger problem. What do you all think I should do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TheQuietWilds Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 hulk smash Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Naterel Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 If youre dating her you gotta lay down the law, you cant have her doing her blotto bull{censored} if shes your girl unless you and her get {censored}ed up and zero disregard for what happens Do you drink like she does? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members neatobassman Posted February 5, 2011 Author Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 If youre dating her you gotta lay down the law, you cant have her doing her blotto bull{censored} if shes your girl unless you and her get {censored}ed up and zero disregard for what happensDo you drink like she does? Not as much as her. I'm trying not to judge too hard because she's had a lot of bad things happen recently and it's only been a little over a month, but those sounds like the words of an enabler. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Naterel Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Not as much as her See post above mine If you wont, someone will Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jo_to_2 Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 bail Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members neatobassman Posted February 5, 2011 Author Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 bail that's what I'm thinking. High school dream to good to be true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TheQuietWilds Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Not as much as her. I'm trying not to judge too hard because she's had a lot of bad things happen recently and it's only been a little over a month, but those sounds like the words of an enabler. Its not your responsibility to monitor her drinking or decide what is or isn't healthy for her. Either you like her, in which case you should be supportive and understanding of her life decisions, or you just want to stick it in and wiggle it around, in which case most of your work is probably already done in advance, from what it sounds like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mhuxtable Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Move on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Naterel Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Theres alot of fish in the ocean, dont screw your life up over some bird. Regardless of the ties that bind Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members neatobassman Posted February 5, 2011 Author Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Its not your responsibility to monitor her drinking or decide what is or isn't healthy for her. Either you like her, in which case you should be supportive and understanding of her life decisions, or you just want to stick it in and wiggle it around, in which case most of your work is probably already done in advance, from what it sounds like. But when she passes out from drinking, I feel weird getting her naked. For real though, I'm just worried about getting in too deep with someone who's barely hanging on. She already keeps me at a distance even though she's the one that asked me to be her boyfriend. I might just be freaking out because my ex and I would spend like every day together and talk all the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members (⌐■_■) Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 ah Inebriation is the next state I would like to visit I have a few friends at ISU I hear they have a great extracurricular program Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mistersuperfly Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Dude I think you met my ex... my words of advice? this will go nowhere and she is bat{censored} crazy and cares more about keeping up her lifestyle than you and if you try to get in the way of it you're gone. She'll probably try to chill out for a week or two for your relationships sake, then she'll get bored, call one of her friends who will get her high and fall off the face of the earth. Then a year later she'll realize what she had and call you all the time to say she misses you and that you're the best guy she knows blah blah blah. Run... run far away as she is not to be trusted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ATauO Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 tough one- All I can say is don't let her lifestyle destroy yours. At some point your going to have to talk to her about it, help her and hope she can overcome her issues. I was in a similar situation a few years ago and I spent more time dealing with the mess she made, the mess she was in, and keeping her safe. To the point where my work, my safety, and my sanity were set to the side. She was really bad for me and I just found myself wanting to be with her more and more (probably because I felt I could save her somehow, and I really, really loved the person in her I knew she was) but in the end, she loved me enough to let me go because in her words "she didn't want {censored} up the last good thing in her life". She didn't want to change, I couldn't make her change, so we respected each other enough to know when it was time to let go. But- someone who wants to change and needs you to be there for them is worth fighting for. It comes down to whether or not that person wants the best for themselves or is happy with where they are in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Naterel Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 also, measure your peen next to hers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mistersuperfly Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 tough one- All I can say is don't let her lifestyle destroy yours. At some point your going to have to talk to her about it, help her and hope she can overcome her issues. I was in a similar situation a few years ago and I spent more time dealing with the mess she made, the mess she was in, and keeping her safe. To the point where my work, my safety, and my sanity were set to the side. She was really bad for me and I just found myself wanting to be with her more and more (probably because I felt I could save her somehow, and I really, really loved the person in her I knew she was) but in the end, she loved me enough to let me go because in her words "she didn't want {censored} up the last good thing in her life". She didn't want to change, I couldn't make her change, so we respected each other enough to know when it was time to let go.But- someone who wants to change and needs you to be there for them is worth fighting for. It comes down to whether or not that person wants the best for themselves or is happy with where they are in life. Yep, all of this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members King Rat Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 depends, do u like the way she dresses? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jo_to_2 Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 hang on.where the pics at? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ispunk Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Call Dr Phil and keep your girl problem threads outta HCFX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Capsule Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 Have the talk, if she kicks and screams and wants to continue down her path, then back away and let her go. If she wants to stop self medicating herself into oblivion then sick around and help her out. In all honesty though, going from the background you gave i would say she has addiction issues as well as some kind of psychological depression. At a bare minimum she's medicating herself to avoid dealing with something... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hiwatt Bob Posted February 5, 2011 Members Share Posted February 5, 2011 unless you see this girl as being the mother of your children--run far, far away. this has cluster{censored}/nightmare written all over it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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