Dad Bands: your definition.

[TheRinger]

This guy cant be for real... "I did a search for Dad Bands but I am not a troll" Gotcha.

 

 

Gotcha? What? Maybe you can elighten me?

[wheresgrant3]

Wheresgrant: Well that is what is confusing me as well. I get in general what they are, although clearly it means different things to different people. I just don't get why the scorn/derision? Generally speaking, I dig anyone else who is a music lover doing precisely that - loving and supporting music. I have nothing but respect for those who can get paid, cuz I generally suck. And I totally understand not liking getting undercut in any business. But this type of attitude exists somewhere between all of that, and I don't get it because when I see it from the outside I'm seeing apples and oranges. And I'd like to think that the people I admire at the top of this craft I wish I was more skilled in are open, generous, tolerant people. And that is not the impression I'm getting from this thread, so I'm trying to reconcile it and understand.

 

 

 

Well assuming that those offended are not playing in markets where rooms are filled regardless the band that is playing. I can see the pressure put upon any band that charges $xxxx and regularly under delivers on draw. We have 3 pay scales here in my area. At the low end it's these supposed dad bands earning $300-400 per night. Again they probably put on a competent and entertaining show for regulars in a bar... but they have absolutely zero following beyond wives and a couple good friends in tow. At the top end it's name your own price (within reason). There is ceiling of course, but if your draw supports it you can set a rate of $1500 or more and be in high demand. Then the middle zone is full of bands of varying quality. Most of them are presumably wanting to move closer to the top. A few might have a small following (20-25) that come out to see them. Others might draw well one night but not so well the other nights on their calendar. Their draw is inconsistent yet their rate is always firm. These bands are the ones that can be in a somewhat vulnerable position when it comes to lower price bands (including 'dad bands').

 

A few years back we used to book a local room that was on the smallish side. Total capacity was 150. We were booked there once a month at the owner's insistence and every show for 2-3 years was an absolute event/party. We were booked for $1800 a show and he collected a $5 at the door. On average we were drawing 200-250 per night. He would have to hire more staff, security, double the beer delivery, crank up the central air, pay a $100 permit to have us play in the dining room instead of the bar... etc. alot of extra expenses for accommodate a larger than normal crowd.

 

He said to me one time...

 

"You know, this place is mayhem when you play. Absolute mayhem. I sell alot of beer, I paid alot of bills, some things always get broke in the bathroom but it all works out in the end. I love when my joint is filled to the brim. But the honest truth is after expenses I don't really make that much money on you guys. It's enough, but I'm not rolling in piles of cash at the end of the night. I also book a bunch of bands in here for $300. Some are terrible, others are boring,... as long as they don't drive out my regulars I'm making good money on them. Of course, I'm losing people at the door who peek in, see the band and turn right around and walk out... but that's why I hire you guys to reel them back in again. The bands that cost me money are "xxxxx, xxxx, xxxx...." (he went and named 4-5 local bands). These guys come in and charge me $800... they bring a PA meant for Giants Stadium. They are loud and rude to the staff and have big chips on their shoulders. They run up a $200 food and drink tab and they bring.... nobody! Sometimes a handful of people. I can't afford them any more. All of them. After the summer I'm cutting them all and hiring a DJ. Don't get me wrong, some of these bands are good, but I can't hire them if they are costing me money."

 

In my market I can see how some of these bands put a bit of pressure on the band's in that middle ground. A bands working for $300 and not offending anyone too badly is better than a good band with zero draw booked at 3x's that amount in the bar owners eyes. And if I were in that situation I might feel they were 'poisoning the well'. But instead of getting mad I would probably do what was necessary at importing our results to make sure that we were not in that competitive position.

[StratGuy22]

Yup. I don't play originals. I can't write originals, none of my crowd wants to hear originals. We play to our crowd, who wants to hear music they know.

Kids these days wouldn't be caught dead in a cover band. Every band we book under 30, is all originals. The only time they have covers, is if they are playing the whole night themselves. They will do a first set of covers, and then their set of oiginals. Usually it's 2 or 3 bands.

[yanktar]

Dad Band = Mid Life Crisis. Some guys buy sports cars some guys buy a Strat.

 

 

So, economically speaking the Dad Band guys are far smarter. New Corvettes start at $54,000 and go up. New Strats start at $500. So, it's FAR cheaper and more sensible to be in a Dad Band than buy a 'Vette.

 

And BOTH are cheap next to the idiots who divorce their wives of 20 or 30 years and get a trophy wife! (who probably demands her own Corvette, BMW or Jaguar)

[TIMKEYS]

Well assuming that those offended are not playing in markets where rooms are filled regardless the band that is playing. I can see the pressure put upon any band that charges $xxxx and regularly under delivers on draw. We have 3 pay scales here in my area. At the low end it's these supposed dad bands earning $300-400 per night. Again they probably put on a competent and entertaining show for regulars in a bar... but they have absolutely zero following beyond wives and a couple good friends in tow. At the top end it's name your own price (within reason). There is ceiling of course, but if your draw supports it you can set a rate of $1500 or more and be in high demand. Then the middle zone is full of bands of varying quality. Most of them are presumably wanting to move closer to the top. A few might have a small following (20-25) that come out to see them. Others might draw well one night but not so well the other nights on their calendar. Their draw is inconsistent yet their rate is always firm. These bands are the ones that can be in a somewhat vulnerable position when it comes to lower price bands (including 'dad bands'). A few years back we used to book a local room that was on the smallish side. Total capacity was 150. We were booked there once a month at the owner's insistence and every show for 2-3 years was an absolute event/party. We were booked for $1800 a show and he collected a $5 at the door. On average we were drawing 200-250 per night. He would have to hire more staff, security, double the beer delivery, crank up the central air, pay a $100 permit to have us play in the dining room instead of the bar... etc. alot of extra expenses for accommodate a larger than normal crowd. He said to me one time... "You know, this place is mayhem when you play. Absolute mayhem. I sell alot of beer, I paid alot of bills, some things always get broke in the bathroom but it all works out in the end. I love when my joint is filled to the brim. But the honest truth is after expenses I don't really make that much money on you guys. It's enough, but I'm not rolling in piles of cash at the end of the night. I also book a bunch of bands in here for $300. Some are terrible, others are boring,... as long as they don't drive out my regulars I'm making good money on them. Of course, I'm losing people at the door who peek in, see the band and turn right around and walk out... but that's why I hire you guys to reel them back in again. The bands that cost me money are "xxxxx, xxxx, xxxx...." (he went and named 4-5 local bands). These guys come in and charge me $800... they bring a PA meant for Giants Stadium. They are loud and rude to the staff and have big chips on their shoulders. They run up a $200 food and drink tab and they bring.... nobody! Sometimes a handful of people. I can't afford them any more. All of them. After the summer I'm cutting them all and hiring a DJ. Don't get me wrong, some of these bands are good, but I can't hire them if they are costing me money." In my market I can see how some of these bands put a bit of pressure on the band's in that middle ground. A bands working for $300 and not offending anyone too badly is better than a good band with zero draw booked at 3x's that amount in the bar owners eyes. And if I were in that situation I might feel they were 'poisoning the well'. But instead of getting mad I would probably do what was necessary at importing our results to make sure that we were not in that competitive position.

 

 

 

A dad band will typically have more fans than just the band wife table. trying to classify bands is tough. Some are more gung ho than others. A dad band strikes me more as a causal band thats pupose is just playing music. They dont worry about the money as much as the spirit of the band. Gigs just pay what they pay.. They just wanna make music There are some great dad bands out there, but you have to go out of your way to find them.

[rccCrawler]

Wheresgrant:

First off, thanks for taking the tome to answer my questions, which I offer with greatest sincerity.

So would I be summarizing your position correctly to say that if the dad band was charging money for regular gigs, then you could understand some guys not being too happy with th because they might poison the pool. However, the only ones who should be upset are those in close proximity to them market-wise.

However, if the dad band does not charge money, or gig regularly - Ie they are simply dads in a band that plays occasional charity events, house parties, or other such places that would not otherwise pay for any kind of band, then you see no harm in it?

THAT I can understand.

Again, around here, from what I can tell, a 'dad band' would fit into the latter category. If they charged and were trying to gig regular, they wouldn't be thought of as a dad band - just a band. Perhaps not a good one. Perhaps as 'weekend warriors'. Usually dad bands aren't gigging, working, trying to make money type bands. That is probably the source of my confusion.

Would a dad band under the latter definition (Ie: not money making) be considered a band by you? Ie do you guys feel that if you are not charging money, it's not a band??

[rangefinder]

 

Would a dad band under the latter definition (Ie: not money making) be considered a band by you? Ie do you guys feel that if you are not charging money, it's not a band??

 

 

To me, these are entirely separate issues. A "band" is a band, wherever they play (garage, basement, Madison Square Garden, etc.) and whether or not they make revenue/profit. There are "gigging bands" that "play out". There are "working bands" that "play out 3-4x per month". etc. etc. all the way up the line. None of that has anything to do with "Dad band" or not.

[tele-vangelist]

Where does all this leave me?

 

I started playing in bands when I was 13 so this isn't a mid-life crisis for me, I've been doing it all along. I am now 45 and have a very busy full time job and a crazy family life (3 sons and 3 step-daughters). I guess you would say I am in a dad band, but if I want to keep playing live music and I don't have the time to play out but once a month, what am I supposed to do? I can't commit to a band playing out 2+ nights a week every week so I should give it all up? Just sayin ...

[ChordGirl]

What's funny is the average age of this thread is probably over 40. If you're over 40 and playing covers you're probably in a dad band in somebody's eyes regardless of how you dress it up. If you are getting whatever fulfillment you seek from it then everything else is secondary. You can be in a dad, mom, aunt, or uncle band.

Yup. I'm in an 'aunt and uncle' duo, myself.

[StratGuy22]

True, I started gigging at 14, all the way through, until I got married. (lol go figure) Everyone wants to be with the guitarist of the band, until they are with the guitarist of the band. Then they want the guitarist of the band all for themselves, and are jealous when the guitarist is still in a band, with everyone wanting to be with the guitarist.

 

 

So I was out of the band scene, then my kids were old enough to be in bands, so I bought a PA for them. I guess that that point, there are soccer moms, and I was a rocker dad. Fast forward a few years, a divorce, and hey I'm back at it with some old bandmates, kicking up a fuss like no-ones business. Everyone else has families etc, so we keep busy enough. We are in a pretty small town of 10,000 so it's not even possible to gig every weekend, without putting a lot of miles on, and frankly it's not really worth it. We are paid well, for what we do, but like I said, we roll with a pretty full on production, no speakers on sticks here. If I'm a dad band, then so be it, though I wouldn't call ourselves hacks, more like seasoned pro's I suppose.

 

Reliving our glory? Sleeping in my own bed, making decent money, having better gear than ever, maybe this IS our glory days, as old farts.

 

 

I'm 41... our frontman is 40, and our oldest member is 45. We've always had players over the age of 40, none of which who have looked or acted their age. There certainly isn't any benchmark in age when you fit this requirement. I think about another popular local band in a nearby city... those guys are all late 40's and early 50's (been together for 25 years) they still draw big numbers and throw a great time. And you'd be suprised how many 20's are lusting after their frontman who is more than 2x's their age. It's all about attitude and presentation, and some bands are able to sell a good time at any age.

 

pssssst

 

I'm 41, and my GF is 25.

 

 

[TIMKEYS]

Yup. I'm in an 'aunt and uncle' duo, myself.

I am in a band made up of all dudes. but we like the fkin eagles

[BlueStrat]

Yup. I'm in an 'aunt and uncle' duo, myself.

[ChordGirl]

[StratGuy22]

[jimiv]

 

That is just stupid, just like this thread. I'm not a big Eagles fan, but I'm calling bull{censored} on this and this stupid dad band thread,

[BlueStrat]

That is just stupid, just like this thread. I'm not a big Eagles fan, but I'm calling bull{censored} on this and this stupid dad band thread,

 

[J.Paul]

In many ways the "dad bands" got it right,
they get to have their 401K, barbques, weddings, funerals, pillows, beds, kids, dogs/cats, yards, HR benefits, lives AND
occasionally get their rock on.

To me the negatives are the defeatedness of it...
dull, lifeless just standing there, no soul in the playing, no pizazz in the wardrobe (sounds more like a shoegazer band actually).....
just dudes going through the motions instead of bringining it every time like they're hungry.
Bands that sound and look like the diet/lite RC Cola version of rock are my definition of "dad bands".

[Yer Blues]

.... lifeless just standing there, no soul in the playing.....

 

Yes. If only they were as soulful as all those party bands jumping around and playing Black Eyed Peas, Pink, and Ice Ice Baby.

[yanktar]

Yes. If only they were as soulful as all those party bands jumping around and playing Black Eyed Peas, Pink, and Ice Ice Baby.

 

LOL!

 

Didn't some wise man say "If you have to ask if you got soul, you don't!" Dad Bands play because they love to play music. Not to get rich, famous and be able drug themselves senseless and screw hoards of young women whose names they can't remember.

[J.Paul]

Yes. If only they were as soulful as all those party bands jumping around and playing Black Eyed Peas, Pink, and Ice Ice Baby.

Lol
Yeah that whole shtick is just as failed in another way but at least it illicts a response ...
Dad bands seem to be spider webs that illicit apathy.

That's ok, its always better to play than to not play.

[TIMKEYS]

Lol Yeah that whole shtick is just as failed in another way but at least it illicts a response ... Dad bands seem to be spider webs that illicit apathy. That's ok, its always better to play than to not play.

 

 

 

You get the AC in the van fixed yet? being hungry and hot may be rock and roll , but I am sure the luster starts to wain after a while. And then they send you down here to the edge of the earth lol. when does your sched bring you back around to the isla grand?

[J.Paul]

You get the AC in the van fixed yet? being hungry and hot may be rock and roll , but I am sure the luster starts to wain after a while. And then they send you down here to the edge of the earth lol. when does your sched bring you back around to the isla grand?

 

 

We got that air fixed every month this summer

Lol

Incidentally we are playing Mechanicsburg PA tonight

Lmao

Had a dad band playing 50 s music on our stage earlier... I enjoyed it; it's something I don't know much about and wouldn't go out of my way for but thought these guys were fantastic ( in their matching shirts)

 

Playing in Spi first 2 weeks of dec

[TIMKEYS]

We got that air fixed every month this summer Lol Incidentally we are playing Mechanicsburg PA tonight Lmao Had a dad band playing 50 s music on our stage earlier... I enjoyed it; it's something I don't know much about and wouldn't go out of my way for but thought these guys were fantastic ( in their matching shirts) Playing in Spi first 2 weeks of dec

 

 

cool ,, I will be sure to catch a couple sets.

[chadd]

 

Incidentally we are playing Mechanicsburg PA tonight

 

Wish I had checked in yesterday, that's just down the road.

[hero]

As with ANY labeled band... some are successful and some aren't. Unless of course the label is "successful". Each of these bands don't need to play. They have interests and businesses outside of music. Yet continue to climb on stage because they love it. They're old. And some... left the stage to pursue other interests only to later return to the stage like someone going through a mid-life crisis.

Dad bands take alot of heat from musicians who need an excuse for why they lost a gig, don't get paid more... etc. Good bands don't make excuses... they make good music.

Here are some examples of dad bands.