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Freebasing Naked With a Plastic Spoon


dramey

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My brother in law finds a plastic spoon in the back of my work van and asks if I was freebasing back there. I found this hilarious. I couple hours later I had a pretty good (bad?) idea of where this song was going, but then mostly forgot about it. I dug it up last night and forced myself to finish it. Parts are going to be a little weird read, but it mostly works over a little punk/pop demo I put together. It's still a bit rough, I've got to do something about rhyming up with itself, but I figured Id throw it up here before I get to attached to anything.

 

I'll try to flesh out my demo a bit and post it this evening.

 

For the record, I smoked pot once. That is the entirety of my illegal drug use. Just say no, mmmmkay?

 

Freebasing Naked With a Plastic Spoon

 

Are you a doctor or am I being molested?

All up in my business maybe I should protest it.

He said, I've seen your condition before in this very room.

That man had been freebasing naked with a plastic spoon. Were you?

 

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

 

I just wanted to get loaded

I just wanted to get locked

 

I remember a few beers with the boys on the town

I remember puffing something being passed around

I saw a bum huffing paint his face all blue,

come to think I might have had a huff of that too.

 

Then I was

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

 

I just wanted to get loaded

I just wanted to get locked

 

The doctor said I've had a few of those nights too.

Its all in good fun, but here comes the bad news.

Remember how the ladies used to stir you up?

Remember how you used to pee standing up?

 

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

Freebasing naked with a plastic spoon

(Freebasing baby)

 

I just wanted to get loaded

I just wanted to get locked

Not quite understanding the thermodynamics of polystyrene

that spoon melted on my jimmy and they sent me home half cocked.

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Your brother in law clearly has no experience with hard drugs.

 

Actually my BIL was a huge speed freak 30 years ago, and has tried everything, even heroin. He was just being goofy. Probably a result of all the drugs he used to do...

 

Ridiculous. I love it. Aside from the logistics of it not being able to work

 

Oh Im going to make it work. The first vs has a little talking bit in it, and the last couple lines are sped up, but they work, or intentionally don't work, or something.

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