I'm a Corporation - WIP

[oldgitplayer]

Stick's new 'Imaginary Businessman' lyric reminded me of something I wrote 4 years ago when I first started songwriting.

(I joined the forum 3 and a half years ago and still having fun).

 

It will need some rough-edged music to support it because I was angry when I wrote it, and I'm still angry about the corporate world and how it has hi-jacked the lives of ordinary people.

​Alternatively I could do a Ray Davies and have biting content juxtaposed with happy pappy music

The lyric will be sung with polite indifference.

 

Anyway - please comment, suggest or not……...

 

 

I'm a Corporation Burton 2010 ©

 

Verse 1:

 

Politicians do just what I say

When I need them to – they'll look away

You want me gone but I'm here to stay

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Verse 2:

 

If a factory's built on your favourite park

If your river dies and your skies turn dark

There are many ways I leave my mark

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Bridge:

 

Let me make it clear I achieve my goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

And there's no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line's what it's all about

 

Verse 3:

 

I'm the blind giant mover and shaker

It's just about me the consumate faker

Where you're the giver and I'm the taker

'cos I'm a Corporation.

[tbry]

Politicians do just what I say

When I need them to – they'll look away

You want me gone but I'm here to stay....that seems counter to what is being said...they don't want them gone because they have the $$

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Bridge:

 

Let me make it clear I achieve my goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

And there's no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line's what it's all about.....I would just take out the word all...seems easier to say, thus I would think easier to sing. Maybe The bottom line is what it's about

 

Very good..I really like the bridge......those corps are buying all the politicians.

[LCK]

 

Very good........those corps are buying all the politicians.

 

Have bought; past tense.

 

I think the line "When I need them to – they'll look away" is meant to suggest that the corporate goons will look the other way.

 

I like it so far, OGP. And I really like the idea of the Ray Davies approach.

 

[oldgitplayer]

Thanks for commenting.

Now that I've brought it out into the light for the 1st time in 4 years, I can see room for improvement.

The revolving door between political life and corporate life has become a central part of the system, and I think it needs a nod.

Also the upward flow of taxpayers money as what is essentially corporate welfare also needs a nod.

[LCK]

The revolving door between political life and corporate life has become a central part of the system....

It used to be -- long, long ago -- in America that running for Congress or the Senate was something people (almost all of them men) did as part of their public service. They stayed in Washington for a few years then went back to their hometowns and their previous occupations.

 

Hence the ease with which corporations now buy, sell and control Senators, Congressmen & to some degree, even Presidents.

 

[mbfrancis]

I think this is really great. Only two things jar for me. 1) The line "Let me make it clear I achieve my goal" is filler and blah. 2) the last verse's rhymes (shaker/faker) won't fit the melody you've established in v1 and v2. Actually the first two lines of v3 are weak, too.

 

I do think you could have leaned harder into the whole "corporations are people" idea, which is law in America now. The bridge is weak, maybe play it out there, something like this:

 

Cause everyone knows corporations are people

didn't used to be, but now it's true

and everyone knows all people are equal

just some are more equal than you

 

Something like that

 

 

[oldgitplayer]

Thanks for those comments Martin.

I agree verse 3 is weak and I will probably dump it altogether.

 

I wrote the song 4 years ago when I decided to try my hand at songwriting, so there's a lot of water under the proverbial bridge since then.

I probably now better understand the toxic effect that the unethical corporates have imposed on the world.

So I'm looking at the whole song with fresh eyes.

 

I appreciate what you are saying with your Bridge proposal, but I want the message to be simple.

I think what you are proposing builds the next layer of understanding.

 

I'll see what unfolds. I have posted about 30 songs on this forum but no music as yet, because I haven't had much of a handle on music.

I think that my composition abilities have improved a bit, so I'll get some music going before I re-write the lyric.

I'm going to need a lot of patience and input from all the established musicians on the forum.

[nat whilk II]

I think this is really great. Only two things jar for me. 1) The line "Let me make it clear I achieve my goal" is filler and blah. 2) the last verse's rhymes (shaker/faker) won't fit the melody you've established in v1 and v2. Actually the first two lines of v3 are weak, too.

 

I do think you could have leaned harder into the whole "corporations are people" idea, which is law in America now. The bridge is weak, maybe play it out there, something like this:

 

Cause everyone knows corporations are people

didn't used to be, but now it's true

and everyone knows all people are equal

just some are more equal than you

 

Something like that

 

 

 

Last thing I want to do is spark a political debate - but in the interests of simple historical accuracy, the idea that corporations could claim Constitutional rights "like people" goes way back...for example, right after the U.S. Civil War, corporations claimed 14th Amendment rights (equal treatment under the laws) and were upheld by the Supreme Court. The ability for any organized group to sign a contract depends on the group having "like people" status under to the law to some extent. "To some extent" is the key phrase -

 

There's not been any new law that turned corporations into people - what there has been are Supreme Court cases in recent years expanding the rights of corporations under the Constitution "like people". The big one that IMHO was a travesty of justice being the Citizens United case that upheld the right of corporations to donate freely to political campaigns and resulted in huge increases in political spending by corporations and the current dismal money-rules-politics situation that has derailed democracy in the U.S.

 

The "personhood" of corporations is, on the other hand, the reason they can be legally sued and taxed. It's also why the New York Times has free speech as an organization. This is a complex issue that cuts in lots of different directions - beware of bumper-sticker slogans that seem to boil it all down to a mythical "new" law all centered around "corporations are people."

 

There's plenty of abuse to target in a song - no questions there. Have at 'em - just don't make your case an easy write-off due to historical innaccuracies.

 

nat whilk ii

 

[LCK]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUFHAsH9Lck

[oldgitplayer]

I like that ^^^ - good simple way of introducing political process to children.

[oldgitplayer]

Following on Nat's comment, I was reminded of how many songs used to have educational content.

I was 20 when the John Wesley Harding album was released and found myself singing this song at gigs, but without knowing who Tom Paine was.

I got a book by him and learned a great deal about the social contract.

I also thought it was great that songwriters introduced us to new ideas.

Who writes these kind of songs now?

 

As I went out one morning

 

As I went out one morning

To breathe the air around Tom Paine’s

I spied the fairest damsel

That ever did walk in chains

I offer’d her my hand

She took me by the arm

I knew that very instant

She meant to do me harm

 

“Depart from me this moment”

I told her with my voice

Said she, “But I don’t wish to”

Said I, “But you have no choice”

“I beg you, sir,” she pleaded

From the corners of her mouth

“I will secretly accept you

And together we’ll fly south”

 

Just then Tom Paine, himself

Came running from across the field

Shouting at this lovely girl

And commanding her to yield

And as she was letting go her grip

Up Tom Paine did run,

“I’m sorry, sir,” he said to me

“I’m sorry for what she’s done”

[Lee Knight]

Great quote above, Phil. And I love where you're headed with this one. Good stuff.

[mbfrancis]

 

 

Last thing I want to do is spark a political debate - but in the interests of simple historical accuracy, the idea that corporations could claim Constitutional rights "like people" goes way back...for example, right after the U.S. Civil War, corporations claimed 14th Amendment rights (equal treatment under the laws) and were upheld by the Supreme Court. The ability for any organized group to sign a contract depends on the group having "like people" status under to the law to some extent. "To some extent" is the key phrase -

 

There's not been any new law that turned corporations into people - what there has been are Supreme Court cases in recent years expanding the rights of corporations under the Constitution "like people". The big one that IMHO was a travesty of justice being the Citizens United case that upheld the right of corporations to donate freely to political campaigns and resulted in huge increases in political spending by corporations and the current dismal money-rules-politics situation that has derailed democracy in the U.S.

 

The "personhood" of corporations is, on the other hand, the reason they can be legally sued and taxed. It's also why the New York Times has free speech as an organization. This is a complex issue that cuts in lots of different directions - beware of bumper-sticker slogans that seem to boil it all down to a mythical "new" law all centered around "corporations are people."

 

There's plenty of abuse to target in a song - no questions there. Have at 'em - just don't make your case an easy write-off due to historical innaccuracies.

 

nat whilk ii

 

No debate here, easy fix:

 

Cause everyone knows corporations are people

never knew that? I guess it's true

and everyone knows all people are equal

just some are more equal than you

 

 

IMO without some depth the lyric risks being slogan-y, and the whole title "I am a corporation" seems to call for that treatment. But develop it as you see it.

 

[oldgitplayer]

I'm not usually lost for words when editing a song, but I haven't managed to shift this one forward yet.

 

Anybody want to toss some ideas in?

 

I'm a Corporation ………….Burton 2010 ©

 

Verse 1:

Politicians do just what I say

When I need them to – they'll look away

You want me gone but I'm here to stay

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Verse 2:

If a factory's built on your favourite park

If your river dies and your skies turn dark

There are many ways I leave my mark

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Bridge:

…................................................. ...goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

And there's no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line's what it's about

 

Verse 3:

…............................move and shake

….............................on the make

…..............................give and take

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Alternative Bridge by Martin

 

Cause everyone knows corporations are people

never knew that? I guess it's true

and everyone knows all people are equal

just some are more equal than you

[tbry]

Bridge:

Lining shareholder pockets my only goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

And there's no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line's what it's about

[oldgitplayer]

Thanks tbry, but I'm chasing visceral wording sung with indifference.

 

Here's where I'm up to. I think I'm almost there. Any comment?

 

I'm a Corporation Burton 2010 ©

 

Verse 1:

Politicians do just what I say

When I need them to – they'll look away

You want me gone but I'm here to stay

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Verse 2:

If a factory's built on your favourite park

If your river dies and your skies turn dark

There are many ways I leave my mark

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Bridge:

Money and power is my ultimate goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

There is no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line is what it's about

 

Verse 3:

Don't get in my way when I move and shake

I seize the day with rout and take

I'm a hungry beast always on the make

Yes I'm a Corporation.

[blue2blue]

Stick's new 'Imaginary Businessman' lyric reminded me of something I wrote 4 years ago when I first started songwriting.

(I joined the forum 3 and a half years ago and still having fun).

 

It will need some rough-edged music to support it because I was angry when I wrote it, and I'm still angry about the corporate world and how it has hi-jacked the lives of ordinary people.

​Alternatively I could do a Ray Davies and have biting content juxtaposed with happy pappy music

The lyric will be sung with polite indifference.

 

Anyway - please comment, suggest or not……...

 

 

I'm a Corporation Burton 2010 ©

 

Verse 1:

 

Politicians do just what I say

When I need them to – they'll look away

You want me gone but I'm here to stay

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Verse 2:

 

If a factory's built on your favourite park

If your river dies and your skies turn dark

There are many ways I leave my mark

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

Bridge:

 

Let me make it clear I achieve my goal

I can take you over or squeeze you out

And there's no light in my corporate soul

The bottom line's what it's all about

 

Verse 3:

 

I'm the blind giant mover and shaker

It's just about me the consumate faker

Where you're the giver and I'm the taker

'cos I'm a Corporation.

 

 

 

May I offer a possible title: I, Corporation

 

There is an I Corporation but it stands for imagination, innovation and a couple other i's -- but no comma.

[oldgitplayer]

Hi Blue - glad to get your comment.

I understand from what you have said that there is a corporation that stands for innovation etc, but I'm not really getting how that would make sense with the approach the song is taking.

Please explain………..