Members saveuplife Posted March 22, 2010 Members Share Posted March 22, 2010 closed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blue2blue Posted March 24, 2010 Members Share Posted March 24, 2010 Any lyrical theme for a second verse/second pre-chorus you see coming from these lyrics? Thanks. No Horns or Halos Verse 1: Blue, ocean blue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted March 24, 2010 Moderators Share Posted March 24, 2010 The chorus is clear. The verse and pre are both good but don't feel like the same song. I think you need to work on following a thread of logic. The fist at your face then the lies and then I'm confused. It sounds good... it would be cool to be clearer though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members saveuplife Posted March 25, 2010 Author Members Share Posted March 25, 2010 closed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted March 26, 2010 Moderators Share Posted March 26, 2010 That is clearer, yes. Better. I see she is the owner of the fist now. I don't know your style, but for me, trying to avoid non conversational words is always good. The word captive is a bit 5 dollar for me. I've got no choice in what I allow. It's always better to just come out and say it. Like you would to your friends if you had the benefit of 20/20 hindsight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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