Rich4Once

Originally posted by brikus as a time killer, for example... Oh....I guess it hadn't occurred to me that people would do that. As for me, if it's not true, I'm not writing it. I have enough real experience to draw from, that making things up just isn't worth the trouble.

Originally posted by brikus Well, this doesn't wet my whistle as you say, but it's still fun to read. If your story is true that sucks...that kind of vandalizing behaviour is despicable. What do you mean "if your story is true"??? Why on earth would I make up such a terrible story?

Okay, Brikus. Here's another to whet your whistle. The band was playing in a town on our regular rotation, and I noticed a young chick I hadn't seen there before. She wasn't a 10 by any means, but she was young and tender, and those doe eyes get me every time. Anyway, we converse on my breaks, and make some plans for the "after-party". We leave the club in her car, heading back to her place. It's a small apartment and not too far from the club. We feast on each other for a while, and her inexperience was showing. I don't think she was a virgin, but she wasn't too far from it. I taught her a few things about what men like, and specifically what THIS man liked. Things went along pretty smoothly, with her eagerness to learn being a real turn on. The next morning, we wake up and go some more, and then have some breakfast. After some grub I tell her that I need to get back to the band house, and we go out to her car, which is where a big surprise was waiting. Someone had vandalized her car, and I was so embarrassed for her. They had taken red lipstick and written "SLUT" WHORE" and "BITCH" all over it. There was all sorts of mess on it, which looked like mud, eggs, and Pepsi, or something. It was dried up, like it had been there a little while. I guessed that someone else in the bar had their eye on me, and when I left with this chick they followed us, and took out their revenge on her car. I suppose there may have been some other motive, but she claimed not to have any enemies. Anyway, it was a lot of fun up until we found her car like that. We went to one of those DIY car washes and I hosed most of that crap off, but there were still remnants of it when she dropped me off. I never saw her again, so I don't know anything else. I suppose the vandal(s) got their point across, right or wrong.

Originally posted by brikus How would you dare abuse disabled people ??? When on earth did you get THAT idea?

Well, I'm 40...I play in a hard rock band, and we play covers in the local dives. At the last gig, when we finished our set a pretty blonde in a wheelchair came up and asked for guitar picks from each of us. When she got to me, she asked if I'd autograph my pick for her. Ever try and sign a pick? Anyway, I got out my Sharpie and initialled it for her instead. Then she asked me to place it close to her heart, and promptly opened her shirt and pulled her bra aside...she wanted it right over her nipple. I obliged her with a grin, of course. Then she smiled sweetly and asked for a kiss. I told her I could only give her a small one...I'm married and I don't want to get out of line. She took her small peck happily and wheeled away with a big grin on her face. When I got home, my wife gave me a kiss and asked how the gig went. I told her I was doing really good..."that's the second kiss I got tonight!" and told the whole story. My wife thought that was nice of me to oblige a fan like that. Obviously, we have a strong marriage. If I wasn't committed to my wife, I certainly could have done much more for that fan!

Originally posted by fuzzball Sorry I wasent meaning to judge, I was just saying that is something I could not do. Don't get me wrong I did some crappy stuff too. Karma sucks.....and you have to admit that was mean. That's pretty much what I was getting at. Beau is acting all proud of himself, and his cruelty towards those he deems not worthy just got under my skin. It's one thing to inadvertently offend someone, but this "hide the pig" thing isn't accidental by any stretch...it's intentionally humiliating someone because she's not a size 5. I just couldn't let that go without comment, and the fact that he defended it just made it worse. I'm no moral crusader, but that was indefensible in my opinion. He even defended it by saying that the gals following this thread weren't offended, so why should I be? I have to believe that the gals chose to bite their collective tongues, as opposed to believing that they weren't offended. Cruelty is offensive, and I don't see that little game as anything other than cruel. I'll comment on it no further, and I apologize for bringing this fun thread a dose of reality. You might note that I posted a number of on topic stories before I got on my soapbox, and I have more, which I may get around to posting soon. Thanks for listening.

Originally posted by BeauNasty You're missing the point, bro. There is a difference between the hot betties in the mini skirts they needed two hair-dos to wear and a band of drunken 20 something dudes wearking havoc while on the road. Picking up a fat chick and going back to the hotel room to play hide the pig didn't necessarily entail a groupie girl from one of our shows. I mean...we might have been crazy, but we're not stupid. What would you pick? The hot nympho who is going to feed you bacon and eggs in the morning or 4 drunken retards barrelling in on you stickin' it to a fat chick you would otherwise never been seen with??? Hell...the chick in this thread isn't offended. You just seem to be a little more reserved than myself. It's ok with me, man. I'm not looking to argue. I'm not looking to be judged either. I wear a smile when I think back to all the crazy {censored} I used to do...and that's all that matters to me. If you want to get your panties up in a twist over it and peg me as a mysogynist that's on you. Sorry if I offended you, man. You won't be the first or the last to cringe at the antics of Beau Nasty. I'm not offended, I just think you're an asshole. That's okay, the world needs those, too.

Well, Harlequin really ain't my thing! My feelings at the time were more along the lines of "if you only knew what was oozing around inside her you wouldn't be wishing you could eat that" and I thought it was funny. She did too, AAMOF. I sat at the bar with my buddy that had loaned us the Jeep, laughed our heads off and drank way too much AmberBock. That was a mistake, actually. I had to play that night, so he drove me back to Boise so I could get ready for the gig. I was still pretty buzzed when we started our first set, but by the end of the second set I'd sobered up enough to play alright. I don't play very well when I've been drinking, and the leader of the band was not particularly pleased with me for drinking all afternoon. He did enjoy the Jeep story, but when I got to the church parking lot part he scolded me about it. I think his exact words were "You're going to hell for SURE, now!"

Well, actually I was referring to your criticism of my statement. I said "cum filled cooch" etc. and you thought it was vulgar. You said it could have been said better, and I asked you to demonstrate by rephrasing my statement in a more picturesque way. Apparently I didn't get that across clearly, but that's okay, since we finally got a story out of you. KEWL! As for your banning...I am unaware of that particular situation...what did you do?

Originally posted by BeauNasty Different strokes for different folks, man. Don't be so sensitive. That was just part of being in a metal band in the '80s and being on the road. Excess everything. Groupies are groupies, bro. They serve their purpose. I think maybe you give them too much credit. Or not...maybe we just come from 2 totally different schools of music and being on the road. I am a complete no holds barred party animal. I sense that you are entirely different. We each have our own sense of dignity...that's what makes the world go around. If we were all the same, this would be one hell of a boring place to live. Personally, I think it's funnier than hell and had a great time painting every town across the Eastern US red. It doesn't mean you have to agree with me. It also doesn't mean you have to be condescending and look down at me from your pedestal. Believe me, I was a slut, but I didn't see the need to degrade the gals just because "groupies are groupies". You're the one being condescending...to THEM, and you obviously put yourself on the pedestal, above them. I saw the band/groupie relationship as a mutual admiration society. They took very good care of me, food, clothes, a bed, and incredible sex...all I had to do was play guitar and be appreciative....I was, and still am.

Originally posted by BeauNasty Come on guys! Someone has got to be from the old school '60s, '70s, '80s and have some whacked stories from back when everyone was high and gettin' laid all the time. Anybody ever go on the road and play "Hide The Pig"? It's when all the band members compete to be the first to get a fat, ugly chick back to the hotel room. Once you get her there you have 10 minutes to get her completely naked with the lights on and the bed completely stripped down to the bare mattress. After 10 minutes the rest of the band busts in the room with a stopwatch and times how long it takes her to cover up...hence "Hide The Pig"! Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha! I've never heard of that, and I frankly can't see anything funny about it. I always had a good time with groupies, but I made sure that they had a good time as well. Humiliating them never crossed my mind. I remember them fondly, and hope they remember me the same way. I've heard from a couple since those days (I love the 'net!) and that seems to be the case. I'd rather be in my shoes than yours.

Originally posted by RockGirl OK Rich4Once, the church parking lot doesn't bother me, and most people have had sex in public before. I myself had sex on the college campus I was attending standing out in the rain. This type of writing probably appeals more to men. It doesn't offend me, but at the same time I would have preferred a little less vulgarity and a little more picturesque speech to convey the point. I like this line. I've been banned a time or two myself Terry usually for daring to post an opinion somewhere that went against the general consensus of the group. So no biggy, places like that are not for me. I'd like for you to demonstrate a more picturesque way of getting that particular point across! PLEASE!

Originally posted by RockGirl Terry, you don't have any alters. Do you? And don't feel bad guys, the only reason Terry got noticed more is because someone posted the beginning over at The Pit and everyone loved it so she provided the link to the rest of the story. That's why I came here in the first place, to tell Terry how much I enjoyed his story. Yeah, I know....but didn't you read the rest of the thread? No comments about me doing a chick out in the open...in the back of a Jeep...in the parking lot of a CHURCH! I mean THAT should get some kind of reaction!

Okay, here's another... My band was playing a club in Creve Coeur, Illinois, near Peoria. A very busty honey with big eyes and dark hair was on the dance floor, right in front of me. She starts giving me the "I wanna do ya" look, and on our break I took care of my personal business and then went to her table. She makes no secret of her intentions, and I tell her to keep her motor running, and I'll be happy to "drive her home" after the gig. Well, she decides that I need to be made aware of her talents, so during the next set she goes back to her spot on the dance floor in front of me, this time with a beer. It was a long neck bottle, and she starts "loving" on this bottle, licking the tip, and putting it deeper in her mouth. By the end of the song, she's deep throating this bottle, and I'm doing my best not to stare as I still have a job to do onstage. I'm getting looks of envy from the bassist/singer, and looks of annoyance from the other guitarist, who was also the leader of the band. He was getting irritated, as this girl was drawing my attention away from my guitar, and I'm not so good that I can afford to have a distraction of this magnitude. I did my best to keep my composure until the night was over, but all I could really think about was this gal's mouth. The club provided a house for the band, and we headed there after the gig. When we got there, she wasted no time getting me upstairs and getting right down to business. As soon as the door was shut she was at my zipper, and proceeded to demonstrate that her oral prowess wasn't limited to beer bottles. WOW! I was in heaven, and I revisited her "pearly gates" many times during our week there, and during our subsequent gigs there. I think of her once in a while, and of course remember her very fondly!

Originally posted by MrKnobs Relax guys. It's just all my alt monikers showing up. Terry D. P.S. And it WAS 30,000 words. I think that might have had something to do with it. that and all my shameless self-promotion Yeah, I know...it's hard to be facetious in print!

Here's one I posted in OJ back in December...I couldn't remember if I'd told this story or not and was about to....did a search, and presto. To preface this...we were playing in Boise...there's a town nearby where this stripper I'd become acquainted with was dancing. A bud of mine from the club we played drove me over there in his Jeep during the afternoon. The DJ and several of the dancers knew me, as they'd been coming over to the gig after they got off work. One of them even used our CD as music during her sets! Anyway....to the story: I did this stripper in Idaho when she was on a break. We got in my buddy's jeep, drove around until we found a parking lot to play in. I was standing in the back of it, holding onto the roll bar, and she was holding onto the front seats. As we left we noticed it was the parking lot of a church! OOPS! We went back to club and got there just in time, since she was up next. She went straight to the stage and did her set. Seeing her shaking her cum filled cooch in all those men's faces made me laugh out loud! That chick was always a lot of fun. Most clubs don't let the girls leave while they're on duty, but the DJ that was in charge was a fan of the band and knew I'd bring her back! I don't really miss the road life, but I do (kind of) miss stuff like that.

Yeah, me too. I posted several groupie stories...my other nic was one4rich (I got banned) and I thought they were pretty good. I tried not to get too graphic but still get the point across. What does a guy have to do to get any respect....write a novel?

Hey, RockGirl....do you have any groupie stories to share?

And that's coming from a former road dog and super slut!

Originally posted by kevinpmurphy I was in a house band 10 years ago, and one night this group of hotties walks in . My lead singer was fightin with his wife and started makin on this really HOT blonde. well 2nd set roles around he's not there so the drummer and I sang for that and the 3rd set . the singer and the blond show up half way through the last set and my singer comes over and rubs his index finger under my nose and whispers in my ear (wanna smell some 20 yearold ?) then he does this to rest of the band . Needles to say we laughed and looked out at this lady and just gave her applause she left flipping us off I would be pretty pissed if a singer left me hanging because he wanted to get his dick wet. When he got back, he would have gotten a few things, but grins, laughter, and applause would not be on the list. If you're gigging with me, you're expected to conduct yourself as a professional, and leave the groupies until AFTER the show. I'm all for a taste of twang if you're so inclined, but not on band time. You can set it up on your breaks if you want, but you don't get any of it on band time. We didn't learn all these songs YOU to sing for nothing...do your job now, get your "job" later. Just my $.02

That's a real beauty, except for the tarnish on the neck pickup. I have had a hard-on for those guitars for many years. I almost got one when I found my Explorer for a great price and went with that instead.

Originally posted by DARKMETL/ I've been playing since like 1987 in bands and I have virtually no stories to tell. How does a dude in a band have no groupie stories. I hate myself. I am a musicians failure. I have no biz in the R&R biz. I'll trade you a few groupies for that '81 Ibanez Destroyer in your sig!

I had hooked up with this chick at the gig, but we didn't have anywhere to go, to get busy. She lived with her sister, who wouldn't approve of her dalliance with a "band guy", and I was at the hotel, but we couldn't afford private rooms so there were 4 of us in one room. I've done chicks in those circumstances before, but it's tough when the "peanut gallery" is commenting on your technique, making jokes, etc. It turns out that she has a friend that works the overnight shift at the local radio station, so she calls him and asks if we can come visit. He says okay, and asks if he can get an interview while we're there. I think she led him to believe that I was someone of "importance" in the music world. When we get there, he's somewhat disappointed that I'm not famous, but she gave him a copy of our CD to listen to while we were there, and he was impressed, or at least acted like he was. We sit and chat in the studio, but he decides that I'm not famous enough to go on the air with, which suits me fine. I had something else on my mind, and was trying not to get impatient. She finally cajoles him into giving her the keys to his apartment, and off we go. We ended up having a real good time in his bed, and afterwards she calls him at the station and tells him so. In retrospect, I think that they were more than just friends, and he got some sort of charge out of me doing her in his bed. I wonder if he had a good time with her in that same bed a few hours later? Sloppy seconds anyone?