B-Bottom

Originally posted by mxpxfan So romantic, maybe you should write a book about it. The Jerking of Jamie. ehhh..........I'll wait for the movie.

two atoms walk into a bar one says "hey, I think I lost an electron." the other says "are you sure?" the first atom says "yeah, I'm positive."

Originally posted by Melanie At least on ebassist people actually bother to acknowledge you exist. That's something that has been severely lacking around here for a while, hence my absence.

Originally posted by Bonoman So far... Hopefully it will stay this way. I hate how disheartened I've become with it over the last month. I love this forum! me too. I don't really care for ebassist.com I'd much rather stay here

Originally posted by Bonoman No, my computer at home broke and we had a long weekend in Canada, so no posting for me. Also, the forum has been slow lately and I've found myself just getting frustrated and giving up if it wasn't loading my posts promptly. gotcha. the forum seems to be running ok today....for now anyway.

Originally posted by Bonoman No, here I am. I may have one foot in the water, but I haven't jumped ship yet... damn it's been awhile since I've seen you post anything. And here I thought you figured you were to good for us

seems as if Bonoman jumped shipped. Damn Canadians

Originally posted by niomosy Super Metroid? Did you pull out the SNES, then? That's one of the best, if not the best, games ever. x1000 god damn that was a great game. Link to the past was great as well. ahhh I miss the good ol' days. Video games now aren't as hard as they used to be. For instance I bought the mega man collection for X box and I had to stop playing because I was so frustrated. I used ot be able to blow right through those games no problem.

Ugh a janis Joplin song is one the radio. It's like fingernails on a chalkboard. Someone explain to me why people like this {censored}

i just fell asleep at my desk for about a half an hour. How no one noticed is beyond me

I have yet to hear a lug mp3. do you guys have a link? I finally got a computer at home. Unlike this work pc my home computer has a soundcard.

ha ha ha ha

To me hippies are people who have no grasp on the world at large and just how things operate.

a buddy of mine showed me this girls site a few years ago. At the time she was around 15 or 16 years old. I'm sure she's got to be over 18 by now. I'm just guessing but I think it was christinamosel.com or something like that. It's unreal how young girls look now. I think when I was in highschool we had like maybe 3 really hot girls to 200 regular ones, which by the way the hot ones are all slobs now. That ratio seemes to have shot up a staggering amount since my 10 years of being out of school. *shakes fist in the air*

Originally posted by Bonoman ugh

Originally posted by Bonoman That sure is a funny looking Union Jack

Originally posted by Bonoman Wow, man. Just... Just wow. Here is another story about the same guy. This happend shortly after the incident i already described. My friend (who's name is Eric by the way) worked as a manager at pizza hut at the time of this. Anyway Eric was leaving his girlfriends house and was heading home when he felt a {censored} coming on. No big deal he thought because he lived at most a half an hour away. Eric drives like a freaking nut so he could probably make it home in about 15 minutes. Well about 10 minutes into his trip he hits traffic. This is around 2 am and he can't understand why there was traffic like this on the highway at such a late hour. Well he's stuck on the highway and the next exit is a few miles away. So he's sitting in traffic, he said it was like a parking lot. Turns out their was a huge accident up ahead and they weren't going anywhere. All the while he's sitting there squirming because he has to {censored} so bad. Apparently it got so bad that he decided to hell with it I'll take a dump in the tree line on the side of the highway. I'll give Eric credit because he did manage to grab something to wipe with out of his car. Usually when you have to go that bad you aren't thinking straight. So he goes in the tree line along the highway and takes a dump. cleans himself up with the "rag" he grabbed and jumps back in his car. It was the next day that he realized what it was he used to wipe with. It was his pizza hut apron. That in itself wouldn't of been bad. But because he was a manager the apron which he left on the side of the highway had his name tag on it with his full name and the store he worked at.

Originally posted by greenshag please share Well this is about a buddy of mine. I think the story would be more funny if you knew the guy. He's about 6' 6" and around 350-360. The guy is a monster and he devours an uncanny amount of food. The other thing is that he has this really deep voice. Kind of like the brother on Everybody loves Raymond. Anyway this happened about 4 years ago at another friends cookouts. He was throwing this party at his dad.s house which is in the middle of no where. My buddy the pooper is devouring the food like it's going out of style. I bet he ate three whole chickens. On top of that he's eating beans and deviled eggs and drinking beer. Recipe for disaster right? Well he goes to the bathroom and and sits down to take a dump. When he's finished he stands up and SLAP!!! his shirt was hanging in the toilet and he {censored} on the back of it. When he stood up the wet, feces covered shirt smacks him in the back of his thighs. At about this time there was a knock on the door. A line was forming of girls who were also at the party. The guys usually just piss outside and the girls use the inside bathroom. In his booming voice he tells them, "I'll be out in a minute." So he takes his shirt off and cleans himself up. he has a wife beater on underneath so it's not like he won't have any shirt to wear. he turns around and flushes the toilet. Nothing goes down. here's he's managed to not only {censored} on himself but clog the toilet as well. Again there is a knock on the door asking if he'll be done soon. He starts fumbling with the toilet but to no avail. When he was telling me thins I couldn't get that scene of dumb and dumber out of my head. Not knowing what to do he sticks his head out o the bathroom door and asks the now fairly long line of girls if any of them have a plunger. Naturally they all look at him in disgust. The one girl who told me about what he said said that her and the rest of the girls decided that peeing out side would be ok for now. So the story got resolved by him sneaking out of the bathroom going up to my buddies dad and telling him that someone had clogged the toilet. While he was in unclogging it my buddy the {censored}er jumped in his car and went home. We had no clue where he went until the next day when he called me up and told me the story.

poo stories are always entertaining because the majority of them involve someone in a frantic state for some reason or another. There was actually a really funny thread on OJ a few months back that had a list of everyones stories. I know I have a few good ones of a buddy of mine and a few about my own poo adventures

I'll put the seat back up, but after I pee all over it. That'll teach her who's boss!