Members BndGrl Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Anyone care to step up to the plate and admit their most embarrassing gig story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Badside Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Well, I was listening to last friday's gig recording, and I am quite embarrassed when I listen to my playing. It's not one of those "you are your worst critic" thing, I truly sucked! I couldn't pull off a simple pentatonic lead without missing a few notes, and I wasn't even drunk. Does that count? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mstreck Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Easy: 1) Having the lead guy throw me a solo (on a song that I never solo on) in front of a packed house. And BLANKING OUT on it! 2) Making the mistake of thinking I could plug my electric-acoustic directly into my amp on stage during a song without overpowering the band with ear-splitting feedback. (note to self: can't be done ) 3) Playing in front of about 1000 people on New Year's Eve... I tuned up between songs and forgot to unmute my guitar. The rest of the band played the intro and then it was supposed to be all me, but instead... SILENCE!!! Our bass player has some good ones. Maybe he'll post, too. Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BndGrl Posted August 2, 2005 Author Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Originally posted by Hardtailed Does that count? Uh...boo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fastplant Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 We played a wedding recently. It was actually for our old singer. So the guests there pretty much knew our old set list and kept asking for older tunes that we haven't played in years. One of the songs was that Shake Your Tailfeather song from a few years back. Well, they were like, "hey you remember the words to that song?" I said no, but they started it anyway. We had 3 separate parts for like the Nelly, P Diddy and Murphy Lee parts. I had the last part and throughout the whole song I'm trying to remember the verse. The problem is that the song is so horrible I've been trying to forget it for the last year or so since we stopped playing it. Well, the song is going great and everyone is loving it. We get to my part and I still can't remember, so I just shrug my shoulders and say, "Sorry guys I just can't remember that part." Well, the song stops and everyone looks so disapointed, then no one really came out to the dance floor after that. Yeah, I pretty much ruined his wedding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BndGrl Posted August 2, 2005 Author Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Originally posted by fastplant I pretty much ruined his wedding. If "Shake it like a salt shaker" is the highlight of your reception, you really need new friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tdempsey Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 playing with fly undone... not that I overlook this task - my best pair of jeans has a zipper that gradually slides down. same with an old favorite pair of cargo pants - I actually auditioned with my fly undone, and got the gig. makes me wonder how sorry the competition was! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators MrKnobs Posted August 2, 2005 Moderators Share Posted August 2, 2005 Hmm.... I could tell the one about the guy who lost a testicle sliding down the flagpole, or maybe the one about Candy and Sandy the two groupie girls who scarred me for life, but those stories and more are right here. Terry D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fastplant Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 Originally posted by BndGrl If "Shake it like a salt shaker" is the highlight of your reception, you really need new friends. Haha, different song, but just as lame. Well the problem was that we had the dance floor going for the whole night until I screwed up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JBJ Posted August 2, 2005 Members Share Posted August 2, 2005 coupla years ago when i was about 16or17 we done 5 gigs on the trot ending with a big outdoor festival thing infront of about 1,000 people. really cool, we're all stoked n whatnot. gig on friday went great so we're all ready for the show on saturday afternoon. saturday morning {censored} starts to go wrong already, drum parts breaking n whatnot. tonnes of stuff. in the end the coiled strings on my guitar actually unwound 9not break liek actually unwind down the fretboard) because of all the heat and sweat te lights of the previous 4 gigs had put into them. a guy form another bandgave me a loan of his guitar, thing was a totally pieceof {censored} i mean the pots are actually hanging out and i cant see my tuner in the broad daylight anyways to tune this thing thats got steel acoustic strings on it. i told the guys to do it without me because i didnt want to {censored} the set up which they ddnt want cos we'd all been looking forward to it. i ended up standing on stage in front of way too many people miming playing guitar while my bros solos fell way flat due to no rythmn to back it up. horrible day but meh when you're inexperienced you're allowed a {censored} up or two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members squealie Posted August 3, 2005 Members Share Posted August 3, 2005 Stretch Jeans that don't stretch, but instead bust at the crotch, leaving me with a little 'speedbag' during a solo. Getting drunk and trying to start fights from the stage. Playing while covered in scabs from a moped wreck. Singer with a 'pee spot' cause he neglected the last shake or two. Puking off the side of the stage. Pulling a spectators boobs out, then seeing her boyfriend standing behind her. Oh, God, make it stop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BndGrl Posted August 3, 2005 Author Members Share Posted August 3, 2005 Originally posted by squealie Stretch Jeans that don't stretch, but instead bust at the crotch, leaving me with a little 'speedbag' during a solo. Getting drunk and trying to start fights from the stage. Playing while covered in scabs from a moped wreck. Singer with a 'pee spot' cause he neglected the last shake or two. Puking off the side of the stage. Pulling a spectators boobs out, then seeing her boyfriend standing behind her. Oh, God, make it stop. I bet it was all in one night too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dr. Jimmy Posted August 3, 2005 Members Share Posted August 3, 2005 Originally posted by squealie Pulling a spectators boobs out, then seeing her boyfriend standing behind her. I think this one deserves an explanation! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members PBBPaul Posted August 3, 2005 Members Share Posted August 3, 2005 Years ago I played in a really awful country band. The singer and I eventually fired the rest of the band and rebuilt it. The new players were all good but from completely different musical backgrounds. All of the tunes revolved around the singer so we learned all her material. At our first gig, she (the singer) showed up with walking pneumonia and a small pharmacy to keep herself going. In the middle of the second tune, she was so drugged up that she passed out and the paramedics came and took her away. The rest of stood there looking at each other with no clue as to what we were going to play to fill out the rest of the gig. We tried all kinds of stuff but basically, we just sucked. After two failed sets, we begged the owner to pay us a little money to go away. It was the most miserable gig of my career. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members zookie Posted August 3, 2005 Members Share Posted August 3, 2005 I guess I have a high tolerance for shame. I've been trying to think of gigs in which the memory of it causes me to sit bolt upright in bed in the middle of the night. Most of my mess-ups are merely amuzing. Used to play in a trio where one of the guys felt we should just be able to launch into any song ever recorded. One time he launched into a song that required a vocal duet. I was a guitar player and bowed out of attempting the song, but the other vocalist had never heard of the song, so when he turned to her and gave her the "cue" she just stared at him. The song gave to an abrupt end. A couple of years ago I started gigging after several years on break to start a family. First gig I set up the PA and started playing (no sound check). Discovered the right channel was dead. I stopped, checked the cables, twiddled knobs, tapped on the mic a bunch of times and figured the used PA I bought was a wash. I continued with the first set, with numerous requests from the audience for more volume. During the first break I noticed the amp for that channel was at 0. I turned up the volume on that channel and it came to life. Had to explain that my partner, who seriously reconsidered her choice of a partner. That was awkward, since my musical partner is also my wife. Other than that, anytime I really mess up on stage I'll step up to the mic and use the old Limeliters line "It's earn while you learn night here at ". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members worthyjoe Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 A couple years ago before we got a bass player, I gigged with a drummer and I played guitar and sang. Well we played mostly little places but we got a chance to open for our old band at a really good venue with house sound and all that. So this was pretty much our biggest gig to date. Two lines into the first song my guitar (elec/acoustic) cuts out. We had to stop. I fiddled with it a little and it was back. Started the song again... about 3 lines into the first verse it cuts out again. There's a really big crowd of people there because of our old friends from the old band coming to see us and whatnot. So this totally sucked. Finally as this happens for a THIRD time, we stop and the sound guy comes up to check it out. The guitar player of the headlining band hands me his PRS (we play dave matthews and stuff) and I start playing with that just to try saving the gig. The guitar is out of tune horribly and I manage to get through a song because I refused to stop again. Somehow they figured out the problem with my guitar and I got it back. We finished our set which was now reduced to about 5 songs. hehe. what a mess. talk about a horrible feeling to be up there figuring out what to do. My guitar had NEVER given a me a problem before or since. I got rid of it shortly after though just for mental reasons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fastplant Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by worthyjoe A couple years ago before we got a bass player, I gigged with a drummer and I played guitar and sang. Well we played mostly little places but we got a chance to open for our old band at a really good venue with house sound and all that. So this was pretty much our biggest gig to date. Two lines into the first song my guitar (elec/acoustic) cuts out. We had to stop. I fiddled with it a little and it was back. Started the song again... about 3 lines into the first verse it cuts out again. There's a really big crowd of people there because of our old friends from the old band coming to see us and whatnot. So this totally sucked. Finally as this happens for a THIRD time, we stop and the sound guy comes up to check it out. The guitar player of the headlining band hands me his PRS (we play dave matthews and stuff) and I start playing with that just to try saving the gig. The guitar is out of tune horribly and I manage to get through a song because I refused to stop again. Somehow they figured out the problem with my guitar and I got it back. We finished our set which was now reduced to about 5 songs. hehe. what a mess. talk about a horrible feeling to be up there figuring out what to do. My guitar had NEVER given a me a problem before or since. I got rid of it shortly after though just for mental reasons. Haha, I remember that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wheresgrant3 Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by fastplant We played a wedding recently. It was actually for our old singer. So the guests there pretty much knew our old set list and kept asking for older tunes that we haven't played in years. One of the songs was that Shake Your Tailfeather song from a few years back. Well, they were like, "hey you remember the words to that song?" I said no, but they started it anyway. We had 3 separate parts for like the Nelly, P Diddy and Murphy Lee parts. I had the last part and throughout the whole song I'm trying to remember the verse. The problem is that the song is so horrible I've been trying to forget it for the last year or so since we stopped playing it. Well, the song is going great and everyone is loving it. We get to my part and I still can't remember, so I just shrug my shoulders and say, "Sorry guys I just can't remember that part." Well, the song stops and everyone looks so disapointed, then no one really came out to the dance floor after that. Yeah, I pretty much ruined his wedding. Hey man!!! What are friends for? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Guitar Centaur Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 This story takes place in the summer of _____________. My band, ___________________ , was playing at _________________ , a local drinking establishment that was part of the hot scene in ______________________ back then. Let me tell you, the place was packed that night! Wall-to-wall babes in revealing, skin-tight outfits. The crowd was just getting warmed up when we took the stage. We rocked that place like it had never been rocked before! I was spot-on that night. When I ripped into the solo in __________________________ , I was just in the zone. I first noticed "her" during our next number, ____________________ . Her name was __________________ and she was hot! She positioned herself right in front of me and started shakin' those _________________ right at me. When she smiled at me, I could see __________________________ . I was hooked. The band finished off the set with a scorching rendition of _________________________ and then I set off to the bar in search of her. She wasn't hard to find. All I had to do was look for the crowd of ____________ around her. As soon as she saw me, she coyly flashed me her ____________________ . I knew she wanted me. I made my move towards her when I suddenly felt a jarring impact on my right temple and was knocked senseless. When I came to, she was nowhere to be found. I discovered that I had been hit by ___________________________ which had been _____________________________ the subject of my affection. Bruised and disoriented, I nevertheless finished the gig with ________________________ and drove the crowd wild. As I was packing up my gear, I heard a __________________________ from close behind me. I knew that had to be her. We hopped in my _____________________ and hit the road, stopping only for ______________________ on our way back to my place. I don't think I need to tell you the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Guitar Centaur Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 This story takes place in the summer of 1999. My band, Two Fisted Buggery, was playing at Uncle Milties, a local drinking establishment that was part of the hot scene in Podunk Junction back then. Let me tell you, the place was packed that night! Wall-to-wall babes in revealing, skin-tight outfits. The crowd was just getting warmed up when we took the stage. We rocked that place like it had never been rocked before! I was spot-on that night. When I ripped into the solo in The Mr. Rogers Theme Song, I was just in the zone. I first noticed "her" during our next number, Hot Cross Buns. Her name was Earlene and she was hot! She positioned herself right in front of me and started shakin' those fatty globules right at me. When she smiled at me, I could see her tonsils. I was hooked. The band finished off the set with a scorching rendition of Theme from Deliverance and then I set off to the bar in search of her. She wasn't hard to find. All I had to do was look for the crowd of flies around her. As soon as she saw me, she coyly flashed me her anchor tatoo with six of her previous boyfriend's names crossed off. I knew she wanted me. I made my move towards her when I suddenly felt a jarring impact on my right temple and was knocked senseless. When I came to, she was nowhere to be found. I discovered that I had been hit by a wooden dutch boy shoe which had been worn by Cooter, the local cross dresser who was enamored with the subject of my affection. Bruised and disoriented, I nevertheless finished the gig with Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star and drove the crowd wild. As I was packing up my gear, I heard a loud, juicy fart from close behind me. I knew that had to be her. We hopped in my tow truck and hit the road, stopping only for condoms, turpentine, and sandpaper on our way back to my place. I don't think I need to tell you the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wheresgrant3 Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 This actually is indirectly gig related... A few years ago we were setting up at a local bar when the Mighty Taco burritos I ate for dinner was having a fistfight with the Reuben sandwich I ate for breakfest (don't ask) somewhere near my lower intestinal line. I'm sure you've had those moments... Cramping and bouts of gas, were replaced with more cramping, loud gastric noises and lots of butt clenching. My face became very pale and flushed. I needed to unload and fast. The problem was this bar was very small and the bathroom was unisex. I'm sure whatever I would leave behind would have the same effect afterward on the crowd no matter how much air freshener I sprayed. I needed to find someplace quiet and secluded. I did a quick mental inventory and remembered that there was a Marriott Courtyard about 5 miles outside of town. Perfect, I LOVE hotel lobby bathrooms. They are always clean and always empty. So I waddle to my car, and drive the 8 minutes out to the hotel. When I arrive, I do as I always do when I use hotel bathrooms (believe me I use them alot), walk briskfully and cheerfully through the lobby and smile at the desk clerk, like I am staying there. This time there was a problem... I knew the desk girl! In fact, not only did I know her.... but she followed the band!!! She was also incredibly hot! her name was Kristen. I tried to walk past without being seen. As soon as I walked in she looked up. She was like "Hey, .... what are you doing here. Don't you have a gig tonight?" I immediately changed the subject. "I didn't know that you worked here. When did you start working here?" So she explained her job and how long she had been there. We made small talk for a bit. Meanwhile a rotten taco was trying to punch a hole out of my ass. Then there was an awkward silence... and I answered her question "Yeah, um, I have a gig at XXXX bar. I just stopped by to, um, see a friend who is staying here from out of town. Do you know where room 120 is?" She looked at me funny and said " We don't have a room 120... are you sure it's 120? What's their last name." I blurted "Coleman.!!!!"... That was my roomates last name... "but it might be under his girlfriend's. Um, he said it was two doors down from the bathroom". "111?" I nodded, "That's right there down to the left." I thanked her and headed straight for the bathroom. As soon as my pants hit the floor even before my ass hit the seat an avalanche of semi digested food poured out. It was never ending. I was in heaven. After I had eliminated every last item from my colon, I cleaned up, washed my face and headed back toward the front desk. There she was, still standing at the desk, "so did you find your friends" with a big smirk on her face. "nope, they must already be at the bar. " I said goodbye and left. Mission accomplished Flash forward three years to last Saturday night. She has a boyfriend now and lives in another state. She's was visiting her parents and she made it out to see our show. She's talking with our drummer... and I pass by. I'm like "Hey... what's up! Where have you been?" She explains her new life story, and I bring up to our drummer... "You know a few years back I stopped at the Marriott before a gig and guess who was working behind the desk" And she finished... "Oh, my God! I remember that.... you came in, took a big dump in our bathroom! and then left" That was the end of the conversation. There wasn't anything left to say at that point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fastplant Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by wheresgrant3 This actually is indirectly gig related... A few years ago we were setting up at a local bar when the Mighty Taco burritos I ate for dinner was having a fistfight with the Reuben sandwich I ate for breakfest (don't ask) somehwere near my lower intestinal line. I'm sure you've had those moments... Cramping and bouts of gas, were replaced with more cramping, loud gastric noises and lots of butt clenching. My face became very pale and flushed. I needed to unload and fast. The problem was this bar was very small and the bathroom was unisex. I'm sure whatever I would leave would have the same effect afterward on the crowd no matter how many times I sprayed air freshener. I needed to find someplace quiet and secluded. I did a quick mental inventory and remembered that there was a Marriott Courtyard about 5 miles outside of town. Perfect, I LOVE hotel lobby bathrooms. They are always clean and always empty. So I waddle to my car, and drive the 8 minutes out to the hotel. When I arrive, I do as I always do when I use hotel bathrooms (believe me I use them alot), walk briskfully and cheerfully through the lobby and smile at the desk clerk, like I am staying there. This time there was a problem... I knew the desk girl! In fact, not only did I know her.... but she followed the band!!! She was also frigging hot! her name was Kristen. I tried to walk past without being seen. As soon as I walked in she looked up. She was like "Hey, .... what are you doing here. Don't you have a gig tonight?" I immediately changed the subject. "I didn't know that you worked here. When did you start working here?" So she explained her job and how long she had been there. We made small talk for a bit. Meanwhile a rotten taco was trying to punch a hole out of my ass. Then there was an awkward silence... and I answered her question "Yeah, um, I have a gig at XXXX bar. I just stopped by to, um, see a friend who is staying here from out of town. Do you know where room 120 is?" She looked at me funny and said " We don't have a room 120... are you sure it's 120? What's their last name." I blurted "Coleman.!!!!"... That was my roomates last name... "but it might be under his girlfriend's. Um, he said it was two doors down from the bathroom". "111?" I nodded, "That's right there down to the left." I thanked her and headed straight for the bathroom. As soon as my pants hit the floor even before my ass hit the seat an avalanche of semi digested food poured out. It was never ending. I was in heaven. After I had eliminated every last item from my colon, I cleaned up, washed my face and headed back toward the front desk. There she was, still standing at the desk, training a co-worker. "So hey, um, since you are working tonight, maybe I'll see you at next week's show?" "Yeah, maybe. Did you find your friends?" I told her... "nope, they must already be at the bar. " I said goodbye and left. Mission accomplished Flash forward three years to last Saturday night. She has a boyfriend now and lives in another state. She's was visiting her parents and she made it out to see our show. She's talking with our drummer... and I pass by. I'm like "Hey... what's up! Where have you been?" She explains her new life story, and I bring up to our drummer... "You know a few years back I stopped at the Marriott before a gig and guess who was working behind the desk" And she finished... "Oh, my God! I remember that.... you came in, said you were looking for friends, took a big dump in our bathroom! and then left" That was the end of the conversation. There wasn't anything left to say at that point. Hahaha, 10 out of 10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members zone_ahead Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by Crustycabs This story takes place in the summer of _____________. My band, ___________________ , was playing at _________________ , a local drinking establishment that was part of the hot scene in ______________________ back then. Let me tell you, the place was packed that night! Wall-to-wall babes in revealing, skin-tight outfits. The crowd was just getting warmed up when we took the stage. We rocked that place like it had never been rocked before! I was spot-on that night. When I ripped into the solo in __________________________ , I was just in the zone. I first noticed "her" during our next number, ____________________ . Her name was __________________ and she was hot! She positioned herself right in front of me and started shakin' those _________________ right at me. When she smiled at me, I could see __________________________ . I was hooked. The band finished off the set with a scorching rendition of _________________________ and then I set off to the bar in search of her. She wasn't hard to find. All I had to do was look for the crowd of ____________ around her. As soon as she saw me, she coyly flashed me her ____________________ . I knew she wanted me. I made my move towards her when I suddenly felt a jarring impact on my right temple and was knocked senseless. When I came to, she was nowhere to be found. I discovered that I had been hit by ___________________________ which had been _____________________________ the subject of my affection. Bruised and disoriented, I nevertheless finished the gig with ________________________ and drove the crowd wild. As I was packing up my gear, I heard a __________________________ from close behind me. I knew that had to be her. We hopped in my _____________________ and hit the road, stopping only for ______________________ on our way back to my place. I don't think I need to tell you the rest. What's this supposed to be? Madlibs? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Guitar Centaur Posted August 5, 2005 Members Share Posted August 5, 2005 Originally posted by zone_ahead What's this supposed to be? Madlibs? Fill in the blanks and make your own story! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RoboCop00 Posted August 6, 2005 Members Share Posted August 6, 2005 Originally posted by wheresgrant3 I immediately changed the subject. "I didn't know that you worked here. When did you start working here?" So she explained her job and how long she had been there. We made small talk for a bit. Meanwhile a rotten taco was trying to punch a hole out of my ass. LMAO, great story Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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