Members Marko Posted August 11, 2008 Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 This song started out me with some funky Bass line I pulled out of my ass... drummer joins in (and neighbor playing search-a-note on the guitar), but it was a fun-sounding song. Again, just a jam taped on cassette via overhead mic. So... I put some lyrics to it, called the Lead Singer over, sang it for him a few times and he took it from there. The guitar parts shouldn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ido1957 Posted August 11, 2008 Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 VERSE IYou said you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Marko Posted August 11, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 Pretty fun sounding number. The second part of verse 1 (above) made me stumble a bit. The first part indicates she likes you, but then the second part contradicts that. The rest reads pretty straightforward, the old switcheroo... That always happens when they find out you have a job/fresh milk in the fridge/actually do laundry....lol...Any chance we might hear your recording? Yeah... I see your point. I was thinking she like me but not Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Marko Posted August 11, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 Maybe something like: You said you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ido1957 Posted August 11, 2008 Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 Maybe something like: You said you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Marko Posted August 11, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 11, 2008 ...Any chance we might hear your recording? Oh yeah. My buddies... "real" musicians, retired from the stage/recording scene... just come around once a week or so to hang out and jam, so I'm working through the week to get the lyrics and arrangements tighter in preparation for proper recording. They're all cool with the project, but I want to do prep work so it doesn't take forever to put a CD together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sentry68 Posted August 12, 2008 Members Share Posted August 12, 2008 HAHAROFL! I like it. I could see the inevitable turn coming in the lyrics, but I still laughed anyways. It sounds like a simple fun song so I wouldn't worry too much about polishing this one. A little anarchy on the guitars and drums would just bring it out more. The only critique I can offer is the parallel construction across verses (i.e. 'you said' leading most every verse) felt a little repetitive, but it may not play out that way when you perform it. Suggestion would be to maybe reverse a line or two... ex: 'I heard you want no man in your life' instead of 'You said you want no man in your life'. Of course there's other songs that cover the same topic, but hey it's hard to critique a funny song anymore- everything's so damn serious in music... I'm guilty of it too. It's like we don't think a song is valid unless it uncovers some heart-rending issue. Anyways, I have to get back to writing my new acoustic ballad (with extra reverb), "Every Girl in the World Broke Up With Me". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Marko Posted August 12, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 12, 2008 HAHAROFL! I like it. I could see the inevitable turn coming in the lyrics, but I still laughed anyways. It sounds like a simple fun song so I wouldn't worry too much about polishing this one. A little anarchy on the guitars and drums would just bring it out more. The only critique I can offer is the parallel construction across verses (i.e. 'you said' leading most every verse) felt a little repetitive, but it may not play out that way when you perform it. Suggestion would be to maybe reverse a line or two... ex: 'I heard you want no man in your life' instead of 'You said you want no man in your life'. Of course there's other songs that cover the same topic, but hey it's hard to critique a funny song anymore- everything's so damn serious in music... I'm guilty of it too. It's like we don't think a song is valid unless it uncovers some heart-rending issue. Awesome... thanks, I was looking forward to a response from ya. Anyways, I have to get back to writing my new acoustic ballad (with extra reverb), "Every Girl in the World Broke Up With Me". I hope you're serious; I'm waiting for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sentry68 Posted August 12, 2008 Members Share Posted August 12, 2008 I hope you're serious; I'm waiting for it. No not really. I was trying to be sarcastic about a 'serious' song. Although it would def. work as a funny song.... I may have to do that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Marko Posted August 12, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 12, 2008 No not really. I was trying to be sarcastic about a 'serious' song. Although it would def. work as a funny song.... I may have to do that! Cheers. Every girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sentry68 Posted August 13, 2008 Members Share Posted August 13, 2008 Dammit! I think that's better than mine and I haven't even wrote it yet. I WILL ANSWER (someday...)! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Microwave Walrus Posted August 13, 2008 Members Share Posted August 13, 2008 looks catchy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members myredshoes Posted August 13, 2008 Members Share Posted August 13, 2008 This is good. I have been on both sides of "I'm not looking for a relationship, oh, no, wait a minute, hey whatdaya know, I'm totally obsessed and clingy" so I really like it. Well done, thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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