Members Jimi Ray Halen Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 just quitting the band thing? My band just broke up again and I'm at the point where I don't know if I even want to {censored} with it anymore. I'm thinking about just continuing with my instructor for the next few months and then see what opens up. Sometimes it sems to be more trouble than it's worth. If people only knew the crap that goes on behind the scenes. It can really get you down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Author Craig Vecchione Posted August 4, 2005 CMS Author Share Posted August 4, 2005 See the "changing members" thread. We've been through singers like nobody's business. Haven't gotten this f'in project off the ground after a year and a half because of it. Before that I simply grew tired of auditioning for other bands that never got anywhere either. Mostly it's people wasting time with something they can't make even minimal commitment to. You'd think I was a teenager describing a garage band, but I'm 43 and the people I've been dealing with are all at least in their 30's. Apparently musical talent and maturity are mutually exclusive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members whiteroom Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 Expecting people to act like mature adults during their free time is WAY too much to ask. Sometimes it's WAY more trouble than it's worth.....but I can't give it up either. I've tried. Have you given any thought to taking up golf? I hear it's addicting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Meatball Fulton Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 I play bass so I need to be playing in bands, solo bass is boring even for bassists I stopped worrying about it because: 1. another band always comes along 2. the best bands aren't soap operas in the first place Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators MrKnobs Posted August 4, 2005 Moderators Share Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by Jimi Ray Halen just quitting the band thing? My band just broke up again and I'm at the point where I don't know if I even want to {censored} with it anymore. Everyone does periodically. The reality of being in a band falls far short of the dream. If only we could just play music and all get along! Instead, personalities get involved, a bunch of incredibly heavy crap has to be hauled around, nasty, run-down dives must be played in, the pay is usually {censored} and works out to about $1/hr if you count all the driving, gas, rehearsal, practice, booking work, etc. Not to mention the cost of the gear you have to haul around, and the certainty that much of it will soon be destroyed or stolen. All to play in front of a few dozen drunks yelling "Free Bird!" And don't get me started on the wonderful relationship musicians have with the police. Look at all you give up to play music: your weekends, your evenings (rehearsal & practice), stress on your relationships, your health playing in smoky bars 'til 2 AM then trying to get to work on time the next morning. If you could just give up playing, you could finally get a good night's sleep, have some quality evenings with your spouse and family, have more money and time to fix up the house, buy a better car, stop hanging around with a bunch of ill-mannered foul mouthed strangers who happen to play instruments, sit on the couch and watch DVDs right in the (newfound) privacy of your own home. You could even get your post count up on OJ! When you think about it, it's completely stupid to try being a musician. I guess you could do worse - you could try being a poet for a living! But don't stress about it. If you're a musician, you don't really have a choice. You HAVE to do it, it's in your soul. 99% of bands fail because one or more people quit and give up. Those people had a choice, so I guess it's best they did quit. Just take a break if you need one. You don't have to be in a band continuously. It's a healthy time between bands to woodshed and learn some new chops, meet some new people, dust off the wife and rediscover sex, go on a roadtrip that doesn't involve bars. After a short while, you'll forget the downside of gigging, get the urge to play again, and you'll find or start a band. God help you! Terry D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members whiteroom Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 Great advice! Mr. Knobs, you're much better than that quack Dr. Phil. Can you put me down for wednesday's? 2:30 if you have an opening. I'm going to da couch now. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jimi Ray Halen Posted August 4, 2005 Author Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 Thanks, MrKnobs. That's what I needed.I'll be in the woodshed for a few months. I'm going to resist the temptation of trying out for other bands or putting my band back together again right away. This time. Sometimes things happen for a reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tdempsey Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 I have been thinking the last couple of weeks about this, since the gigs are thinning out. The upside? Leaving the band thing would permit more time in my humble home studio, writing my own stuff. The downside? The gig money allows some spending money for buying used/new gear. It's just taking too long with the summer season tanking, which I thought would be crazy-busy. Jimi, I would encourage a breather. You're still a musician when band-less. About finding a good band experience, it's like finding the right spouse, when you stop looking, you'll find it. My problem is I'm 43 and I don't think that I'll be able to start with a new gigging band if I stop now. Plus, I like my bandmates across the board, and usually there has been one in every line-up that I'm incompatible with, not the case now. Just my 2 cents... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators MrKnobs Posted August 4, 2005 Moderators Share Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by Jimi Ray Halen Thanks, MrKnobs. That's what I needed. I'll be in the woodshed for a few months. I'm going to resist the temptation of trying out for other bands or putting my band back together again right away. This time. Sometimes things happen for a reason. Good luck! You'll know when the time is right to jump back in. Terry D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators MrKnobs Posted August 4, 2005 Moderators Share Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by tdempsey My problem is I'm 43 and I don't think that I'll be able to start with a new gigging band if I stop now. Plus, I like my bandmates across the board, and usually there has been one in every line-up that I'm incompatible with, not the case now.Just my 2 cents... I used to worry about the age thing, but I'm 52 now and don't have any trouble putting bands together or getting in one. It's more about your personality and your playing than your age. Sure, you probably will freak out some youngsters when you show up for a death metal band audition, but not too many guys over 40 are still into that sort of music anyway. One of the most liberating moments in my life came when I stopped stressing about "making it" in some kind of rockstar way, and realized there's no reason I can't play music my entire life, if I want to. My current band ranges in age from 24 to 57. I've formulated the vague generalization that the older folks tend to be better players but grumpier and with more family and work obligations, but the younger people have more energy, are more willing to play out, and are more open to new ideas. Terry D. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Lee Flier Posted August 4, 2005 Members Share Posted August 4, 2005 Wonderful posts, Terry. All totally true! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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