Confidence!

[6Imzadi]

Wow, I have had some bad nights running sound, but this thread is a bunch of EPIC FAIL for sure.

[Mogwix]

i had that saturday. excellent speaker, but he had a beta58 waist high.

These people think the mic is like some kind of magic baton, that magically makes you really loud so long as you're holding it in your hand.

I was providing sound for a small awards show a few months ago. Bunch of presentations and a band after. I know the organizer very well, good friend of mine, and me and her were standing at the console talking. A woman was on stage, holding the mic (an e835) at her waist, talking.

Organizer looks at me and says "can you turn it up? I can't hear her"
"I could but the mic would feed back, won't be pretty. she needs to speak INTO the microphone, or at least in it's general direction"
"but she IS speaking into the microphone..."
"You don't speak out of your vagina do you? I don't think she does either."

Promoter laughed so hard that the whole assembly turned around to see what was going on. I would never say such a thing otherwise but I've known her a long time, and I couldn't resist.

[scarecrowbob]

One of the funner times I have had was the time I was running sound for a meeting of a bunch of realitors, and the presenter gave the wireless mic out so all 60 of the realitors could introduce themselves. You'd think that they would have come to come sort of consensus on how to best use the mic, but some folks would talk into the side of the mic, some would wave it around while they talked, some would hold it a couple of feet away, and some would actually speak into the thing.

That incident was really helpful in my future dealings with non-tech folks. I always remember that there are a bunch of bright, successful folks in the world who think that simply holding a mic makes them audible to an entire room.

[Axisplayer]

They treat it like the tribal talking stick. "If I have permission to speak, the PA will magically recognize me."

[Dogoth]

also, it is my fault your scratched cdrw wont play. also, you dont have to bring guitar cables. that is my job. oh yes, i did happen to bring 10 DI's. my analog mixwiz does in fact have scene recall, i am just too stupid to use it and enjoy wasting your time resetting the board. you are in fact the only band i ever mix, evar . i'm sorry you cant hear the vocals clearly. why dont you come closer than 300'. thank you for complaining about the poor sound quality while standing behind the stage. i will get right on that.

 

 

But how do you REALLY feel about it?

[Dogoth]

I got blamed for the beer being too warm one time!

Andy. What's wrong with you? The beer's too warm!

If I'm at FOH I get told about lights all of the time (the air conditioner is also under my control).

One of my favorite scenarios is when some corporate weenie (the more type "A" the better because they, of course, know more about sound than you do) decides that the lecturer should stand right in front of the main speaker. It's usualy the same one with the b58 at waist level.

There's a performer who shall remain un-named who likes to mix from WAY UPSTAGE. He would literaly stand next to the drummer and say things (during the show) like "more treble in the mains please". Now that could be a confidence killer! After getting to know this individual though, you soon realize that he is a psycho freak and has no clue what so ever. He treated his band much worse. Funny thing was they were all far better player & singers than he was. I asked one time "why do you put up with the abuse"? The reply was "money". Enough said.

The story about the folks behind the stage reminded me that friend of mine has a sign that hangs on a mic stand that looks something like this:


Loud-------------------Quiet

Back to The OP.

It's absolute proof of the saying "S**t in S**t out", and short of tuning their instruments (sometimes that means tuning them out into the dumpster) and teaching them to play, there's nothing you can do but make sure you still get paid. If it's bad enough though, it does make for some fun colorful stories later on down the road (like "remember the guy who's kick drum sounded like a cross between a tympany and a tuba?":D?).

Cheers

[ShizzelDizzel]

also, it is my fault your scratched cdrw wont play. also, you dont have to bring guitar cables. that is my job. oh yes, i did happen to bring 10 DI's. my analog mixwiz does in fact have scene recall, i am just too stupid to use it and enjoy wasting your time resetting the board. you are in fact the only band i ever mix, evar . i'm sorry you cant hear the vocals clearly. why dont you come closer than 300'. thank you for complaining about the poor sound quality while standing behind the stage. i will get right on that.

lulz