Members BillyGrahamCracker Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Dear Patty, I'm truly sorry for smacking you upside your cute little Texas head the other night at the ballgame. I guess it was the beer talking. But you have to understand, I have a lifelong fascination with ballplayers' wives. It wasn't Rafael Palmeiro and Davey Martinez who were gangbanging Ryne Sandberg's wife; it was me and Mark Grace. It wasn't Steve Garvey's fault that he had all of those illegitamate children; he was acting out of frustration because Mrs. Garvey was screaming MY name in bed. So, Mrs. Biggio, it wasn't a case of assault when I took a swing at you. Rather, it was a case of simple flirting with a little S&M thrown in (I've heard that you like it rough, but that Craig won't play that game). So, if you ever need someone to spank that healthy Texas fanny of yours, you know who to call. Sincerely, William Z. Fingerdo (my inspiration) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AcousticControl Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 "I told the police, 'Don't put him in jail, bring him to me in the dugout,"' Guillen said. "Hopefully, that won't happen again." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ginnboonmiller Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean "I told the police, 'Don't put him in jail, bring him to me in the dugout,"' Guillen said. "Hopefully, that won't happen again." If I had known what a badass Guillen was before the playoffs, I would have traded in my black and orange for black and white a couple years ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BillyGrahamCracker Posted October 25, 2005 Author Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean "I told the police, 'Don't put him in jail, bring him to me in the dugout,"' Guillen said. "Hopefully, that won't happen again." I wonder if they DID. I was going to say I was surprised that MORE of this stuff hasn't happened (remember that case where that father and son ran onto the field and assaulted the KC 1st base coach?). But then I remembered that, sadly, all of the tickets for the World Series games didn't go to the typical White Sox fans, but to slimy northshore rich folks who've jumped ship for the fall from being Cubs fans. (There's nothing I hate more than the Cubs and their fans!!! ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AcousticControl Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 p.s.: {censored} that little beady-eyed {censored}er Biggio. SOX IN FOUR!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blaghaus Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 I'm all about the sox this year (as I was last year). The astros are good, but a bit characterless. you cant accuse the sox of that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Twang Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by BillyGrahamCracker Dear Patty, Man, that's pretty low. If someone hit my wife I would have smashed in their {censored}ing skull with a baseball bat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members papa taco Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 I don't follow baseball. Can somebody explain to me exactly who {censored}ed who and who hit who? Spell it out for a guy.Hi confusion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ginnboonmiller Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by papa taco I don't follow baseball. Can somebody explain to me exactly who {censored}ed who and who hit who? Spell it out for a guy. Hi confusion! The whole {censored}ing thing was BGC's brilliant but professionally idle creativity at work. No one screwed. Imbalanced fanboy slapped the other team's player's wife. Guillen manages the fanboy's favorite team, and is a total badass for calling out the fanboy in his apology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Twang Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by papa taco I don't follow baseball. Can somebody explain to me exactly who {censored}ed who and who hit who? Spell it out for a guy. Hi confusion! Read the link above. Basically, a White Sox fan hit the wife of a player on the Houston Astros. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Help!I'maRock! Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean p.s.: {censored} that little beady-eyed {censored}er Biggio. SOX IN FOUR!!! so you don't go by the "i root for an NL team, so i'm going to stay in the league during the series" line of thinking. traitor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Twang Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by ginnboonmiller Guillen manages the fanboy's favorite team, and is a total badass for calling out the fanboy in his apology. Meh. Guillen is a lot of talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Andersonology Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by papa taco I don't follow baseball. Can somebody explain to me exactly who {censored}ed who and who hit who? Spell it out for a guy. Hi confusion! Congratulations, you're still in the running to be America's Next Top Model...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blaghaus Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 The real hero is bobby jenks. Throws triple digit heat and is fat. He gives hope to so many. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ginnboonmiller Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by Mr. Twang Meh. Guillen is a lot of talk. He's talking his boys into a World Series sweep, my friend. Aside -- the dugout reaction to Posednik's first home run of the season (coincidentally the game winning run with two outs in the bottom of the ninth) was freaking priceless. The facial changes: crap, popup. no, wait... base hit? holy crap! Amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AcousticControl Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by Help!I'maRock! so you don't go by the "i root for an NL team, so i'm going to stay in the league during the series" line of thinking. traitor. seriously, if it was virtually any other team than the 'Stros, i could back em. but i jsut {censored}ing hate those guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Andersonology Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean p.s.: {censored} that little beady-eyed {censored}er Biggio. SOX IN FOUR!!! :mad: 'STROS IN 6!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Andersonology Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean seriously, if it was virtually any other team than the 'Stros, i could back em. but i jsut {censored}ing hate those guys. Why is that? They didn't sign your baseball card when you were 5? They're always beating "vastly superior" teams? They don't beat up their wivesgirlfriends? They don't get suspended for steroid use? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members papa taco Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Baseball players are almost as fat as NASCAR drivers. What a {censored}ty "sport." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Help!I'maRock! Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean seriously, if it was virtually any other team than the 'Stros, i could back em. but i jsut {censored}ing hate those guys. i have 2 reasons for rooting for them:1. i want to see craig biggio win one. he's been one of my favorite players2. i will never root for the AL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AcousticControl Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by Andersonology Why is that? They didn't sign your baseball card when you were 5? They're always beating "vastly superior" teams? They don't beat up their wivesgirlfriends? They don't get suspended for steroid use? hooowee! someone's got an axe to grind!well, lessee. don't like Biggio, never have. he's a beady-eyed creep who dives in front of pitches at every opportunity. actually, i respect that part of his game. anyway. can't STAND roger clemens. objectively speaking, he's a MUCH bigger prick than Barry Bonds (just ask Mike Piazza's left temple). have almost as much disdain for god-boy Pettitte. {censored} that mouth-breather too. don't like Garner. looks like a mean drunk you'd encounter in a seedy bar. can't imagine that's a fun clubhouse to be in right now. oh, and Stros in 6? you can't actually believe that, can you?? hi, delusion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BillyGrahamCracker Posted October 25, 2005 Author Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by blaghaus The real hero is bobby jenks. Throws triple digit heat and is fat. He gives hope to so many. If that guy is the 270 that they claim, then I'm the Duke of Liverpool. Same with Jerome Bettis. Fat athletes should EMBRACE their chub, not lie about it like some middle-aged woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members BillyGrahamCracker Posted October 25, 2005 Author Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by Help!I'maRock! 2. i will never root for the AL. But that's the thing. These White Sox aren't playing like an AL team. That's one of the reasons I wanted to see them play St. Louis. Because the Cardinals are an overpriced, slugging group of AL wannabes and I would've loved to see the White Sox beat them like an NL team. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Twang Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by delorean seriously, if it was virtually any other team than the 'Stros, i could back em. but i jsut {censored}ing hate those guys. Man, the Astros have to be just about the most likeable guys in all of sport. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Twang Posted October 25, 2005 Members Share Posted October 25, 2005 Originally posted by papa taco Baseball players are almost as fat as NASCAR drivers. What a {censored}ty "sport." Screw you, Canuck. Shouldn't you be watching hockey or wife tossing or something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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