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These are the best lyrics of the past ten years bar none.


John_McEnroe

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Courtesy of MC Paul Barnum.

 

"I've got a very goth towel/ A terrycloth cowl/ And when I wear it/ I'm a hairy moth owl."

 

"I'm iller than the Iliad/ And show more than Shoah/ While you're so corny you've got a SOH-CAH-TOA/ PEMDAS EFX the number one skirmisher."

 

"I'm advancing the art form/ De-pantsing a fart storm/ Some people don't like thinking/ I guess it's too hard for 'em."

 

"I bungee jump/ Into my grungy dump/ And come up with a trust fund-y dust bunny spongy clump."

 

"My dandy voice makes the most anti-choice granny's panties moist,"

 

 

 

 

:mad:

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Stephen Lynch:

 

Lullaby

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Hush little girl, sweet sweet baby don't cry tonight

Daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullaby tonight

Why can't it all be like it was before?

How can I explain why mommy's not here anymore?...

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'Cause daddy likes porno and ten dollar whores

Daddy gets wasted and robs liquor stores

Daddy likes rubbing against little boys on the bus

I think that's why your mommy left us

 

Hush little girl, there is no reason to fret tonight

Don't mind the smoke, daddy just wants to forget...[cough]...tonight

Soon it will all be like it was before

Any minute she will walk through that front door

 

But daddy plays poker and drinks lots of beer

Then he wants sex that involves mommy's rear

Daddy has sores on his naughty parts oozing with puss

I think that's why your mommy left us

 

Please don't cry

I swear I'll try

To be here by your side...

 

Right after daddy gets home from the bar

Visits his bookie and steals a new car

He'll drive to the strip club

And if daddy plays his cards right,

He'll bring home your new mommy tonight

 

 

 

 

:D :D :D

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