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R.I.P. Ronnie Barker


blackpig

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Ronnie Barker's best lines

 

A selection of the star's finest lines, from classic shows like The Two Ronnies, Open All Hours and Porridge.

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

On a packed show tonight, we'll be talking to an out-of-work contortionist who can no longer make ends meet

 

 

Porridge:

 

What have I learned, Mr Mackay? Three things. One - bide your time. Two - keep your nose clean. And three - don't let the bastards grind you down

 

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

The man who invented the zip fastener was today honoured with a lifetime peerage. He will now be known as the Lord of the Flies

 

 

Porridge:

 

Doctor: I want you to fill one of those containers for me.

Fletcher: What, from 'ere?

 

 

Open All Hours:

 

Don't just crit there siticising!

 

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on

 

 

The Frost Report:

 

I look up to him because he is upper class, but I look down on him because he is lower class

 

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

The search for the man who terrorizes nudist camps with a bacon slicer goes on. Inspector Lemuel Jones had a tip-off this morning, but hopes to be back on duty tomorrow

 

 

Porridge:

 

(Playing Monopoly) Would you Adam and Eve it? Go to jail!

 

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

Ronnie Corbett: There you are, four candles.

Ronnie Barker: No, fork 'andles! 'Andles for forks!

 

 

The Two Ronnies:

 

Ronnie Corbett: So it's good night from me...

Ronnie Barker: ...and it's good night from him. Good night!

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This is sad news and a real loss to British humour :(

The guy was an absolute genious I have to say and yes, the other Ronnie is still around. This reminds me of the day they said Eric Morcombe had passed away...he was another talent we lost to early.

RIP Mr Barquet as they would say on Bo Selecta :(

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And don't even get us started on poor Peter Cook...might have the greatest of them all!

 

I was completely enamored with British comedy growing. For me it starts and ends with Python, but I was exposed to a lot of other great stuff too: Two Ronnies, the Goonies, and what was the name of that that three man troupe? Kind of hiipie-ish guys? Darn, can't recall.

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