Harmony Central Forums
Announcement
Collapse
No announcement yet.

Time Falls

Collapse



X
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Time Falls

    All comments welcome. Thanks!

    Time Falls
    (c) Rick Dieffenbach

    What would you do if you got back those minutes
    you had wasted in your life?
    How would you spend them?
    Would you waste them again?

    Would you hang on to each moment, hold it, close to yourself?

    And on the wall
    The clock reminds that time
    Falls

    When you were young, you fueled your life in high test
    Never thinking it would change
    You never worried
    It would always be the same

    But as the years flew so fast
    You knew it wouldn't last

    And on the wall
    The clock reminds that time
    Falls

    ["Do do do..."]

    And on the wall
    The clock reminds that time
    Falls

    "Now and then... occasionally... it seems to have.... too many notes"

  • #2

    Superb Rick.  I'm really looking forward to what you do with this. 

    A couple of the lines in V1 felt somewhat clunky, but I can't tell if that is a delivery issue or if it is the line itself.  Here are a couple suggestions for V2

    When you were young, you fueled your life in high test

    You found it couldn't last

     

    Great tune.

    Don't listen to Justin.
    LCK - 2/21/2012

    Comment


    • rickidoo
      rickidoo commented
      Editing a comment

      Thank you Justin. That makes good sense.


  • #3
    This raises more questions for me. I'm not saying you need to answer any of them in the song... what you have already is good, but in case it sparks something for you, I'll just ask away.

    Did you know those minutes were wasted at the time? If not, then were they really wasted? Is now you more important than then you?
    ...

    Comment


    • Lee Knight
      Lee Knight commented
      Editing a comment

      Awesome tune, Rick. I think Ryan's got a point about the word "waste".



      rhino55 wrote:
      Did you know those minutes were wasted at the time? If not, then were they really wasted? Is now you more important than then you?

       


      I know you hate when people start writing lyric ideas out. I really don't' know how to communicate my idea for this any other way though. Forgive me and understand I'm not suggesting you should use my mock up in any way. Or do. That's not why I'm posting lyric ideas sketched out, it's just the way my mind works. Put it out there so it can be seen and improved upon. Or not.


      Orig:


      What would you do if you got back those minutes
      you had wasted in your life?
      How would you spend them?
      Would you waste them again?


      Idea:


      What would you do if you got back those minutes
      You you let slip in your life?
      How would you spend them?
      Would they just get away again?


  • #4
    Rhino, Lee and LCK. MMM... have thought things over a bit, but I think I want to stay with wasted.

    To me, the song is sung in the present day, and so the present day person will define for them what was wasted and what not. So time that one thought was wisely used when he/she was very young may very well be looked upon in his/her older years as wasted. That was my intention at least.

    As for the meaning of time falls, it was suppose to mean that all things end, or as George Harrison so artfully wrote, All things must past.

    When I was cleaning my house of some 20 years out a few months ago I realized the clock had been on the wall through all the years, good times and bad. But in the end, it was all washed away. Time fell.

    It's now hanging in my new place to remind me. All things must pass.

    At any rate, that's what I had hoped it would mean!

    Thank you all for the comments and suggestions. Much appreciated, as always.

    Rick
    "Now and then... occasionally... it seems to have.... too many notes"

    Comment


    • #5

      Hi Lee, LCK and Rhino,


      Thanks for the suggestions and ideas. After much thought I want to stick with "wasted".  My intention was the current day person's view of what was wasted backl then, even though the past person might have argued it was time well spent.

      As for the meaning of time falls, it is akin to "all things must pass" (harrison), sort of saying that no matter how forver you think something is and will remain, it won't. Time will end.


      At least that was my hope!

       

      Rick

      "Now and then... occasionally... it seems to have.... too many notes"

      Comment


      • Oswlek
        Oswlek commented
        Editing a comment

        rickidoo wrote:

        Hi Lee, LCK and Rhino,


        Thanks for the suggestions and ideas. After much thought I want to stick with "wasted".  My intention was the current day person's view of what was wasted backl then, even though the past person might have argued it was time well spent.

        As for the meaning of time falls, it is akin to "all things must pass" (harrison), sort of saying that no matter how forver you think something is and will remain, it won't. Time will end.


        At least that was my hope!

         

        Rick


        FWIW, both worked for me.  


      • LCK
        LCK commented
        Editing a comment

        rickidoo wrote:

        Hi Lee, LCK and Rhino,


        Thanks for the suggestions and ideas. After much thought I want to stick with "wasted".  My intention was the current day person's view of what was wasted backl then, even though the past person might have argued it was time well spent.

        As for the meaning of time falls, it is akin to "all things must pass" (harrison), sort of saying that no matter how forver you think something is and will remain, it won't. Time will end.


        At least that was my hope!

        Rick


        I have no problem with the idea of time being wasted.

        Time falls still seems a bit strange to me, but it's certainly an interesting way of putting things. Maybe if you added the image of an hourglass, where grains of sand fall from the top part to the bottom?


    • #6
      I like Time Falls.
      __________
      Ain't no sacrilege to call Elvis king
      Dad is great and all but he never could sing -
      Jesus

      Comment


      • #7

        I agree with the bit of awkwardness with time falls, and I've racked my brain and can't think of an alternative that retains the two word phrasing of "Time ___". However, there is a very powerful abstractivity in this song. The lyrics remain outside of specifics but are still written in a broad way that anyone can relate to. And that is why reading these lyrics made me shudder a bit. How precious time is.

        Comment


        • stickboymusic
          stickboymusic commented
          Editing a comment

          Ok heres an idea

           

          And on the wall
          The clock reminds that time
          Flies..... then falls

           

          I think there should be time for this.... the "flies" has a partial rhyme with "reminds" and it may make the idea a little clearer?


      • #8

        Time flies
        Then falls

        Another reason flies then falls, works so well to me is that it gives substance to the word 'falls'. It goes from being in motion to being static. From being usefull and full of life to being wasted, dried up and of little use. Like an old uneaten peach on the hot sidewalk..

        Time flying means it gets away, the colloquialism, but it also seems to mean here, that it soars. That your time can be ripe and full and useful.

        Then we hear time falls and... It says wasted. Time falls now has context. When it's flying ride it and keep it in the air because we all know time falls too.

        I like that.

        __________
        Ain't no sacrilege to call Elvis king
        Dad is great and all but he never could sing -
        Jesus

        Comment


        • LCK
          LCK commented
          Editing a comment

          Lee Knight wrote:
          Time flies
          Then falls

          Another reason flie,s then falls, works so well to me is that it gives substance to the word 'falls'. It goes from being in motion to being static. From being usefull and full of life to being wasted, dried up and of little use. Like an old uneaten peach on the hot sidewalk..

          Time flying means it gets away, the colloquialism, but it also seems to mean here, that it soars. That your time can be ripe and full and useful.

          Then we hear time falls and... It says wasted. Time falls now has context. When it's flying ride it and keep it in the air because we all know time falls too.

          I like that.

          Very nice. Time flies, time falls...













      Working...
      X