Members Yeah Posted June 27, 2002 Members Share Posted June 27, 2002 I'm trapped inside,My own mind,My soul won't bend,and so I end... Opinions, it's from a slow song I'm writting. Imagine about 4 seconds between the lines, and each line is more spoken than sung. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MadKeithV Posted June 27, 2002 Members Share Posted June 27, 2002 Not bad, how about "the bars of my soul won't bend" to continue the "trapped" or "prison" imagery? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Yeah Posted June 28, 2002 Author Members Share Posted June 28, 2002 Originally posted by MadKeithV Not bad, how about "the bars of my soul won't bend" to continue the "trapped" or "prison" imagery? Not a bad idea, but it really wouldn't fit in with the timing (but thanks for the suggestion). Also, you could view the soul as the prison... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members myles loud Posted June 28, 2002 Members Share Posted June 28, 2002 Originally posted by Yeah I'm trapped inside,My own mind,My soul won't bend,and so I end...Opinions, it's from a slow song I'm writting. Imagine about 4 seconds between the lines, and each line is more spoken than sung. i like what your saying so far.... and so i end....replace posibly with :will i live again..or:can i live againor:will it ever end...just suggestions. myles loud Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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