Members myredshoes Posted March 5, 2008 Members Share Posted March 5, 2008 Saturday morning got a sleepy babyjust wants to sleep all daygot a night life babywants to sleep all dayI could love some companywish that she'd come out and play It's time she might get up nowmaybe watch cartoonslay with me on the couch nowmaybe watch cartoonsmissing all the good stuffsleep until afternoon maybe turn them up nowsee what becomes of thatturning up the TV just a bitsee what becomes of thathear that roadrunner beeping babyhear that coyote splat walk down to the bedroomsee what can I seelook in our bedroom door nowsee what can I seebaby's looking much too good for her own goodI will not let her be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dega500 Posted March 5, 2008 Members Share Posted March 5, 2008 Ok here goes... Hey myredshoes, Nice job, the only thing I can offer is maybe work on the timing of the next to last line. It doesn't apprear to match the rest of the work to me. maybe a quick: "looks much to good for her own good" or just leave off the "for her own good" Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members myredshoes Posted March 5, 2008 Author Members Share Posted March 5, 2008 Yeah it doesn't match. Demoed okay but your version of the line is good too. Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dega500 Posted March 5, 2008 Members Share Posted March 5, 2008 That's the problem with trying to critique a written lyric. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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