My New Song! Please listen and comment :)

Hi!

About a week ago, I posted a song I made called Doctor Doctor

Since then, I've bought a Shure 58 microphone, an Audiobuddy preamp, and a new soundcard (audiophile).

I don't think this is the only reason I've improved, but contributory factors none-the-less!

Anyway, here is my new song! Hope you enjoy it, I had a blast making it Over only the last few days

My Obsession

Thanks!

Tommy

sadgag

{censored}ing metal.

Hi Thanks for posting your songs. After listening to them both, your new gear has made an improvement in the overall quality of the recording. I enjoyed the sound of the effect(harmony?) on the vocal on the obsession song. However I thought the guitar tones were sligthly thin. Good luck with future endeavors!

PS. Obviously this is not metal(Like 1 poster sugguested)??? More like Elvis Costello/Violent Femmes influenced...

Yeah, I was a bit perplexed

I don't even like metal.

Thanks a lot for the comment Twisted Logix, I followed some advice in my last thread to improve quality, I'll work on the tone a bit in my next song.

you have really improved your stereo range.

the song is very energetic and funny sounding and has good flow.

something about the vocal makes it somewhat less appealing to me, makes it kind of pop or child song.

Thanks. I hear you on the vocals. If there's one thing that's been consistantly criticised, that's it.

How would you recommend I improve my singing? Or is it simply practicing scales and the like?

the vocals sound more 90's brit-pop. the song needs more agressive vocals i think.

I will give two thoughts the first is on the recording. All sounds are built from the bottom up. the fundemental frequency is the lowest note. Thus in order to give your recordings a little more stablility you need to bring the bass more to the front of the mix. However if the bass sound is thin, this could cause things to be too harsh on the ears. You can keep it to the round wound sound with more high end then low end, just be carefull. Your guitar sound is very harsh and could come down some in the mix. While not a fan of the style, I see where you are going and bass up and guitar down will help being out the contrast and disonance with the melody.

Second point: The lyrics. This needs some work. There are points where the lyric disrupts the flow of the song. Whether it is silence or too much lyric, it feels disjointed. It actually causes the listener to notice. Almost like a cd skip. Not fatal, but just enough for you to loose the moment.

Good effort - Keep at it.

Thanks a lot brew

It's quite difficult to apply all the advice heard on here, but it is extremely useful to hear it so I can attempt to make improvements!

I'm astounded by the level of help found at this forum

Sounds cool!

Very different from what I write, but I dig it! Remember to make sure you like it first, you have to listen to your songs for years to come, but you also do not want to spend years "tweaking" and re-recording. It is what it is, your song that is. At the same time, like others have told you, re-writing and re-arranging is always good. You can hear some of my songs at www.xaltar.com if you wanna know the kind of stuff I am doing. Listen to the podcast! Keep up the good work!

I think the vocal arrangement is really cool, and the performance is certainly acceptable.

The drum beat during the verse (the actual pattern, not the sound) doesn't work for me. Sounds a little too stock.

I should note that I'm not very familiar with this style.

hahaha i like you rsone. when i listen to this song i can see it in a snowboard video...but that probably doesnt mean much to you.

Cheers, for the drums I'm using hammerhead which is the best free drum sequencer I could find... admitedly I didn't look that hard Still, I'm sure I could add some variance in the drum track ie for the different verses to make it sound slightly more "human".