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new song - "toxic afternoon"


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The song itself is fun and charming and enjoyable imo. Your singing is out of tune at the chorus which makes it a little hard to listen to for me. You could either fix it...or have la-la-la backing vox behind it which are absolutely perfectly in tune... well-sung backing vocals might make the lead vocal sound humorous - but maybe that's my twisted sense of humor.

 

It's sounds like you're having fun with the song and that's a good thing. I found the restart after the acoustic breakdown at the end unnecessary. I would end it at about 2:48-ish when the acoustic probably lands at the home key of the song.

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Hey, thanks for listening. Yeah, I'm gonna rerecord the vocals once I get well and see how it comes out, but it wouldn't surprise me if I kept them the way they are (good idea on the backup vocals though, I'll have to try that).

 

As for the restart, I'm not really sure either. It's probably kind of annoying if you're listening and expecting it to end right there, but I really wanted to end the song kind of uptempo, mainly just to keep it in spirit with the rest of the song.

 

Again, thanks for listening. :wave:

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based on the previous review I'm going to hold off till you get this recorded the way you want it. lord knows I've played recordings for people long before I ever should have and I still do from time to time cause like you (I presume) you're excited to get it out.

 

in anycase, get the vocals the way you want them and I'll check it out then.

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Oh {censored}.. I love this. I love the texture of the electronic instruments with the acoustic guitar, and the chorus melody is interesting, memorable, and the lyric is fun and inviting!

 

Great song!

 

The vocal is kind of all over, but it also gives the song this whimsical kind of feel. They could use a redo, for sure - but the way they are doesn't kill this song for me either...

 

Nice job! :thu:

 

I'm going to listen again....:)

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