New Song: Parades in Heaven (Alt-Rock)

I just finished another semi-rough version of one of my songs. I appreciate any/all comments and feedback, I spend way too much time listening to these songs myself, and outside feedback is always VERY helpful

Soundclick link: Parades in Heaven

Myspace link is in my signature...song meaning and lyrics are on that soundclick page.

Feedback?

Jeff, I heard your song, and finally signed up to Soundclick - so I could actually download it. Yeah, I loved it!

...And you're local?! Cool!!! I'm by Peoria!

Beautiful tune, dude! Reminded me of a collaboration between Coldplay and Jeff Buckley.

I just finished another semi-rough version of one of my songs. I appreciate any/all comments and feedback, I spend way too much time listening to these songs myself, and outside feedback is always VERY helpful Soundclick link: Parades in Heaven Myspace link is in my signature...song meaning and lyrics are on that soundclick page.

What did your arps and the sound on them?

If that is you singing I think you did a good job. Although I feel some of the annunciations are a tad overboard (don't read into that too much, it just seems like singers--I don't sing--tend to sing different than they talk almost creating their own accen). ETA: no offense if you are a foreigner.

The structure of the song is excellent and it is a catchy song. I did not like the arp being so loud during the guitar solo though. If it was my song I might actually consider removing it there.

You should be proud.

Sounds good. I agree with Devery about the arp during the guitar solo. Other than that, good job. It kind of reminded me of forumite Open, who also writes religious songs with Alt-Rock trappings.

http://soundclick.com/open

Thanks for the comments guys! Yeah the arp really is just background so I'll just make it quieter; I added it in the solo/bridge because theres little else going on in that part. I think I will eventually add some drum accents and bass accents in that solo part too.

When the guitars come in loud it totally drowns out the vocals - I'd suggest turning them down some there. Or find a way to eq them away from the voice. I agree the arp could come down on the solo.

As far as songwriting goes it's very good and well arranged. Great job!

Good job man. I don't have much critique that isn't already mentioned- just wanted to say I like the song and a little polishing will make it really shine.

Thanks...Yeah, I actually did also notice the vocals might not be loud enough in the heavy parts before I uploaded it. I guess I'll have to make the guitars softer or add another track and separate the chorus vocal line from the verse one.

Let us know when it's updated...I'll want to download the polished version, too.

Thanks for sharing!!

Well, my plan is to get like 5 or so songs completely written, then I'll go back and finalize all of them and release them in "perfect" condition all at once. So it may be awhile till i get around to polishing this one

-1

I definitely wouldn't say it sounds like Coldplay or Jeff Buckley. Sounds a bit more like Saves the Day and Death Cab, especially in the vocals. However, it's pretty good song.

Nice job Heckxx! The only critique I can add is about the loud-soft dynamics. You know: a soft verse, then a loud chorus; that song structure is extremely overused. I would just say to be mindful of that in the future. Otherwise,

cheers to you.

Yeah, there's too many songs out there with traditional chords, too...Make up your own, and check to make sure they've never been used before.

...And don't use traditional "words", either, while you're at it...

I got someone's panties in a bind. I didn't agree with your opinion...and offered my own...I didn't attack you, so ease up.

And my critique was valid. When you look at the modern rock scene today, everyone still uses the same loud-soft formula that was popular in the 90s. There is nothing wrong with being traditional, I was just giving my honest assessment of Heckxx's song, and tried to give him something to think about while writing in the future.

No panties, no bind...

I don't think that was invented in the '90s. It's been a standard of mainstream songwriting since at least the 50's (maybe longer?). If you're going to critique a single member for following such a widespread and accepted universal practice, you may as well critique him for not writing in some dead language as well.

My point was that your particular choice of suggestion isn't really relevant to any one writer.

Ok, we can rephrase it as "I think someone's got sand in his vagina". Either way, you should back off of ProgRock11.

Define it however you want, it doesn't mean you're not wrong.

There's nothing to "back off of"...I simply stated that his specific criticism of this particular artist seemed more like a global issue and wasn't really relevant to the setting. If that gets taken personally, the issue is on the other end. It wasn't intended to be any kind of "in your face" personal attack.

If there's sand in anyone's vagina, it's not in mine.

Ok, I'm sorry I wasn't more clear on this. What I am speaking of is the soft-loud dynamic popularized in the 90s. Where the verses have clean-toned guitars and then the choruses have heavy over-driven guitars.

This is an uplift effect, meant to push the chorus out in front and also serves to draw the listener's attention to that section. Throughout much of music there have been many formulas for providing and creating this uplift effect. In the 50s-60s, the effect was obtained by only having certain instruments play during the verse, then bringing in the entire band (horns/backup singers/lead guitar/organ/what-have-you) for the chorus. The uplift can be created by simply changing the key of the song specifically during the chorus, because it draws in the listeners attention. Many bands in the 70s just upped the volume or sang more projectively and passionately during the chorus. Led Zeppelin broke up the groove and interjected guitar riffs to lift out the chorus.

So, I'm not saying to not lift up the chorus. The chorus should be ear-candy, meaning it should be the hook our ears have been trained to listen for. But I am critiquing the 90s super-overdriven guitar chorus. This particular form of uplift is overused. I'm not telling Heckxx to sing in a dead language, use unconventional/weird instruments, or to go all avant-garde on our asses. But I am telling him that it's something to consider while songwriting...that he doesn't have to rely on one form of uplift.

I apologize to Heckxx, your song is great and you have promising talent. None of this discussion was directed toward you or meant to get you down in anyway.

Well, it turns out I lied, and I did end up updating this song a little bit (because I wanted to submit it into a contest). Its not much different, and actually, I don't think I fixed the vocals-not-loud-enough-in-chorus problem, lol. But check it out if you want.

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=6832713

-Jeff