My first collaboration on Kompoz.com

So I found this guy named Andy Orriell from Britain via Kompoz.com who has all these really cool instrumental songs but no vocals or lyrics. So I put something together for him. You can check it out here if you like: http://www.kompoz.com/compose-collaborate/home.track.project?trackId=62351

The lyrics are there as well. Tell me what you think. I don't even know if the Andy will like it. His music sounds a lot like the Smiths. Maybe not this one but his others do so I tried not to emulate Morrissey's vocals at all. I do that too often anyways. Perhaps that's what he was going for. I let you know what he says.

Cheers,

Deric

I'd drop the first section--once you get to the superstitious line, it picks up, but I was filled with dread during that first verse, afraid it would all be sung in slow-motion.

Dread??? Hmm. Well The guy who wrote it ended up liking it. I will ask him though if he likes the intro part or not.

Cheers,

Deric

I've always been a big fan of the smiths and I can definitely hear them in his playing and general arrangement. The vocals I also enjoyed but got more of a Jim Morrison feel from those. It blended well and I enjoyed it. I do agree that the intro was lacking. Perhaps instead of cutting them out you might think about some background harmony type stuff leading that first verse into that second.

Very solid throughout, I think you should continue to work with this musician. The combination works in my ears.

very nice .... you wouldn't know the music and lyrics were written separately

i do love the Smiths, but i don't hear them hear ... i do hear that song "if something something call me Superman" but it's not dominant

good job

So we're at the point where the song is ready for general release. Nobody objected to the intro vocals. I think it sets the stage for the song but I'm probably a bit biased. You can listen here:

http://www.soundclick.com/ontological

I don't think there's much of a difference except I added a bit toward the end of the lead solo. :blah:

Cheers,

Deric

Yeah!!!! Rock! Chicken... dread? Come on! This is cool. It conjures up lots of references but I like that. So... The Cult is what I'm hearing a bit of and to me, that's a good thing. ROCK.

I think you do a good job of finessing the Morrissey aspect, but you might have to just give in, put on your pansy pants and yodel like the backing track wants you to.