Anyone want to collaborate on lyrics (or to critique my new song)?

So, I love writing music, but I hate writing lyrics with a passion. Just wondering if anyone wanted to collaborate with me here! I just wrote this song, and I intend to enter it into the effects sections songwriting competition, but I'd like to add lyrics to it if I could, so I thought I'd see if anyone could help. Also, general criticisms of the song would be greatly appreciated so I know what I need to fix!

Here is the song.

Let me know if you feel like helping with words, or if you have something that already fits! Now, for me to enter it into the competition, it needs to be a love song, and when I wrote the music, I had my girlfriend in mind, and the thought that even though I know I should be scared that things are moving so quickly with her, it feels right, so I'm not afraid at all. If you could work within those constraints, it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance!

Update: I tried writing lyrics. I know it's hard to tell if they're good or not, without hearing the melody or how they'll fit into the song, but if you guys could just let me know if the words suck, and what parts of the lyrics need fixing, I would really appreciate it. Thanks.

Unnamed song:

I feel what

Colaborating on lyrics is in my opinion, "very difficult..." It's much easier to sing on someones tune? or play an instrument? Than it is to colaborate on the lyrics. Lyrics are just so personal? For me, I always struggle with words that rhyme with boobs for instance? Tubes, ahhh, lubes? Ummm cubes? And then there's the challange of making that fit within the context of the song? And what rhymes with nipple? I mean "really", it's tricky.

ripple and cripple to name a few.

Then of course you could go with a psuedo rhyme like "nibble" or "apple" as well.

I know what you mean. I was afraid that might be the case since I hate writing lyrics. Oh well. I'm working on it right now, and if I get something passable together by the end of the night, I'll post it up here for comments so I can get them critiqued before I lay the vocals down. Thanks.

TRIPPLE! Rhymes with nipple! Although... I've never even had a double :-( And the years are slipping past... (sobs quietly and turns away) Sometimes, if I hear the song? And someone says "here's the title?" I can write the wordz. That's how I did it recently with someone else who wrote "Starlight" as an insturmental? And all I had was the music and the title, and I wrote the words. I'm quite certian I would not have been able to do that without the spark, the title? So I think lyrics need "a spark" of some kind to get you going.

Alright, eff it. I've never written a love song before, but here it goes haha. I edited the original post so that it has my lyrics in it. I know it's hard to know what melody I'm planning to use, and how I'm planning on fitting them into the song, so I guess if you could critique the music by itself, or if you could critique the words by themselves, I can go from there.

The words are what I'm really, really concerned with though, since I personally am happy with the music. Please, please let me know what sucks about the lyrics though, so I can try to fix them haha.

Thanks in advance.

I REALLY like that!!! I can't listen right now to the song itself, but I love the lyrics!! I am a bit like you...when I'm in the right frame of mind I can be prolific with music creation (if somewhat technically stunted), but lyrics? UGH. Painful.

Very nice lyrics -- very good use of dual meanings and visual references (my personal love). And the feeling of being so in love that you cry is wonderful. Been there, done that.

I'll listen to the song later, but you've done a really good job on the lyrics.

Wow, thanks you two! Not quite the response I was expecting since I thought the lyrics sucked haha. Maybe I'm just too insecure sometimes, since I don't really know what I'm doing. Glad you guys liked them though. I'll try to track them later to see what you think in the context of the song. Thanks again.

Alright, I updated it to add the lyrics. Let me know what you think.