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ok.. I wrote a poem that could possibly be used for a song ... tell me what you think


Dr. Tweedbucket

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Daisy Chained Day Dream

 

 

 

The River runs deep

Roadrunner goes beep beep

You may not care

how I wear

my hair. :cool:

 

Long snaggletooth robotic ghost

Make some cinnamon toast

Coffee is good

just like I knew

it would. :)

 

Graham Cracker Crackhead Grandma

I lost my Superball

Stocks are going down

I think that I am going

to frown :(

 

Rabbit Golf make up your mind

Leaky sunroof, oh THAT's just fine

Leaky pen washed in the machine

Instant Karma, its all

a dream :confused:

 

Grind the gearbox, warranty's out

Crank up an eight track, twist and shout

Crank up a crank but don't crank it too far

Your family can find you, down at

the bar :mad:

 

Last but not least, the mailman said

Telemarketer calls you, jump out of bed

Court TV, Sue anyone you can

Think about a meat loaf straight out of

a can :o

Straight out of

a can..... :cry:

 

 

 

:)

 

 

 

 

......I worked on that one for almost 5 minutes......... :o

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I think you've got an awesome way with phrases. I want to see you take the time to connect them in a storylike fashion. I realize that it's intentional. But I think you are selling yourself short by going too nonsensicle.

 

By taking your off the cuff, very cool phrasing, but then... taking the time to have it all tell me something real, that's the key. Find the strongest image and write a chorus around it. So you worked on it for 5 minutes. I see that. Why not take a day and make it something real. You obviously have a knack. But it's not a song. What do you think...

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Thanks Lee,

 

Yeah, actually years back this forum was about as dead as ever and I wrote up some of these crazy songs just to try and get someone riled up or something like that (trolling) You know, write something that totally makes no sense and try to confuse some of the more serious minded folk

 

I am writing songs for another CD and am happy that some of the songs are coming together so well. I posted one already ... it's the Memphis song.

 

I'll post a few songs I did in the past ... in fact this one has a video I put together for it>

 

Got a Vette :)

 

 

Got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime

I got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime ... :o

 

It's a blue two door and it runs real good

Got 75 horsepower under the hood

The motor smokes and the muffler roars

but when Springtime comes, I'll be blowin your doors...:mad:

 

My Vette could probably beat YOU in reverse :o

I'll drive with my mirror and get to the finish line, First !

 

Yeah, I'll be King of the Hill and feelin fine

my speedometer goes up to 99 :)

I'll get a chrome valve cover and a high lift cam

with an 850 Holley on a tunnel ram :cool:

 

[solo]

 

[bridge]

 

Sometimes, I get lost, but now I know...

With the variable Vette steering, this car goes where it wants to go :eek:

 

 

Yeah.... and make no mistake with a new set of rings

this fine machine is going to need some wings .... :cool:

I'll be flying along and people stare,

cuz you don't see a Vette just anywhere .......

:o

 

 

....yeah, baby ..... this thing is going to fly ........

 

..... ohh yeah man !!!

 

 

Got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime

Got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime

 

Got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime

Got a Vette and I'm souping it up in the Springtime ....

 

vErDc0PnViw

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Here is another song I wrote and recorded called Ratt City, it has a kind of neat wrap around: And here is a link to some of the other songs:

 

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=303955

 

RATT CITY :)

 

 

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

Come on down ................ to RATT city....

 

Get there at midnight, hit the East side of town

Keep on movin, check what's going downnnnnn ......

 

.....in RATT city........ :o

 

Streets are dirty, eyes are on you every where.....

Feeling the rush, there's panic in the air .....

 

.....in RATT city........ :)

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

C'mon down ................ to RATT city......

 

I'll grab my camera, don't forget your gun.....

Wear your sneakers cuz we may have to runnnnn ..... :eek:

 

......through RATT city ........

 

A walk through the park should be good for a scare....

Guys in the shadows, take their pictures if you dare....... :confused:

 

.....in RATT city........ :o

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

Come on down ................ to RATT city....

 

 

Playing with danger as we run on down the street.....

See some people that you'd never want to meet ..... :(

 

.....in RATT city........ :o

 

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

C'mon down ................ to RATT city...

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

C'mon down ................ to RATT city

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

C'mon down ................ to RATT city

 

Were going down............... to RATT city

C'mon down ................ to RATT city

 

 

Thanks for your nice comments! :)

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