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OT: need chick advice


Bluescout

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Posted

So I've bee seeing an old "friend" lately. It started out as a booty call but I think she wants more. I like her but it's not a forever thing. We had a little talk but not enough. She left me a voicemail about things being fine but sounded sad.

 

Please read what I'm going to send her and let me know what you think.

 

 

 

 

========================

 

 

I got your message and you sound so sad. Please don't be sad. I thought I'd send you an e-mail so I could think more carefully about what I write. I am tempted to not rock the boat but you deserve absolute honesty. I've known a talk has been coming. Unfortunately it's really hard to do all snuggled up in bed. When we're all nekkid and cuddly warm I tend to say whatever makes you happy. No, you're not allowed to use that to your advantage...

 

I really enjoy our time together. Really. But we're at different spots in our lives. I'm still under the illusion I could get married and have kids. You've had yours and don't like to talk about marriage. But it's OK. I'm not saying that anyone is right or wrong, just going different directions.

 

I'm not saying all this because I want us to stop. I'm saying this because I want to be completely straight and not have any misunderstanding and most importantly, I don't want to break your heart or hurt your feelings.

 

I've enjoyed being together more than I thought I would. It's been much more than a holiday booty call. Like you said in your message that having me around has brightened things up for you, you have for me as well. And it's nice knowing that I make someone smile. It's nice to have someone I can massage and flirt with and hug and tease. Thank you for reminding me I'm still alive.

 

So, whatever it is that will keep you from being hurt, that is what I will do. We can stop, or we can continue enjoying what we have. The only thing I won't do is make promises I can't keep.

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Posted

I think that, at this point, she deserves more than an email/voicemail. Basically, I think what you are saying is fine, and very fair/reasonable, but at some point you just have to man up and do these things face to face. By the content of your note, it seems like you are past that point. Don't take the easy way out.

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Posted

yeah the email is fine but it would be way betta if u could somehow tell her face to face,. hell print that out and read it would be betta than her reading it at home by herself. Email is kinda a diss., If u want to keep it on the side just talk to her. She will appericate it way more.. Plus u will get to see her first and most of the time true reactions, instead of some planned out BS.

 

good luck,...

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Posted

 

I think that, at this point, she deserves more than an email/voicemail. Basically, I think what you are saying is fine, and very fair/reasonable, but at some point you just have to man up and do these things face to face. By the content of your note, it seems like you are past that point. Don't take the easy way out.

 

 

+1 billion!!! No stupid emails. Just talk to her face to face. She's a person with feelings too, and although it may be easier to write something to say everything you want without being distracted, you should still tell her this in person. Just be honest and everything will be fine.

 

{censored}...maybe she's just in it for the sex! Did you ever think of that?!?!

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Posted

fux sake your're blowing it , nothing wrong with mutual sexual pleasure , sure feelings go along with it but enjoy it , put {censored} into perspective later .

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Posted

FINE FINE FINE DAMMIT!!!!!

 

She just called and told me she took the day off and wants to come over. The reason I wanted to send an e-mail is that it gets read as-is, completely, and without discussion or mushiness clouding the points in it.

 

I was enjoying the sex but I can't be dishonest if it's going to hurt her. It's the price you pay for getting old.

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Posted

 

who says romance is dead?

 

 

This does.

 

"When we're all nekkid and cuddly warm I tend to say whatever makes you happy."

 

Using "nekkid" in a note written down "so I could think more carefully about what I write" may be a sign.

 

TALK TO HER. You've taken the skin boat to tuna town, it's the least you can do.

 

 

Otherwise it sounds like a fill in the blank form letter.

 

Dear FILL IN NAME,

 

I've enjoyed the time that we've spent together. Sometimes I think to myself, "HE/SHE could be the one" but really I'm just fooling myself. You need a BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND that can meet your emotional needs and right now, that isn't me.

 

Kindest Regards,

 

FILL IN NAME

 

 

---

 

grrr takes too long to type...

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Posted

 

FINE FINE FINE DAMMIT!!!!!


She just called and told me she took the day off and wants to come over. The reason I wanted to send an e-mail is that it gets read as-is, completely, and without discussion or mushiness clouding the points in it.


I was enjoying the sex but I can't be dishonest if it's going to hurt her. It's the price you pay for getting old.

 

 

If you need to, read the letter. Literally write it down and read straight from it.

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Posted

Be straight with her. Friends with benefits are GREAT if you and your partner are both clear on what's going on. If that's not the case, end it. It'll end ugly, and someone could get hurt. And, you know bitches are crazy. Some hurt bitches are vindictive. So, be 100% clear.

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Posted

Well, she came over and I read the whole thing out to her. We talked a bit and she was glad and feels we are on the same page. Of course, exactly what I thought would happen did: we're talking and then she just starts making out with me. I'm glad I typed it out and made her listen before she mauled me.

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Posted

 

I think that, at this point, she deserves more than an email/voicemail. Basically, I think what you are saying is fine, and very fair/reasonable, but at some point you just have to man up and do these things face to face. By the content of your note, it seems like you are past that point. Don't take the easy way out.

 

 

+1. Yeah.

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Posted

I agree with the man up and do it face to face and all.

The big question is how do you deal with a woman that is slightly? psycho and has a large caliber pistol?

 

The problem with wimmens is that they have already gone over every possible thing that they could say and that you could say well in advance.

They are looking to trip you up, catch contradictions, and generally gain any advantage or information that they can.

 

Yet, they still want us to think that they are so sweet and innocent.

 

They are ready to ambush us and they lie in wait for the perfect moment to attack. When you are in the mood for love and not for talkin'.

 

Just refuse to play their game or by their rules.

 

You have to be prepared to walk away from the most amazing example of the Good Lord's artistry (for the evening), to maintain your sanity.

 

Better an occasional night alone, than a lifetime of "companionship" with a woman that you can't stand.

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Posted

 

Be straight with her. Friends with benefits are GREAT if you and your partner are both clear on what's going on. If that's not the case, end it. It'll end ugly, and someone could get hurt. And, you know bitches are crazy. Some hurt bitches are vindictive. So, be 100% clear.

 

 

End it?

Easier said than done, grasshopper. Often the booga-wooga proves too sweet to limit one's intake, and in spite of an intensifying bellyache, there's a desire to eat more.

 

The best thing: join the military and develop a resistance to comeback-coochie. After a good 4-yr enlistment, it'll be easier to engage the booga-wooga with a sober eye and disciplined tongue.

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Posted

 

Well, she came over and I read the whole thing out to her. We talked a bit and she was glad and feels we are on the same page. Of course, exactly what I thought would happen did: we're talking and then she just starts making out with me. I'm glad I typed it out and made her listen before she mauled me.

 

 

Hallelujah!

It's official! Romance is with Elvis, Abraham Lincoln, and Prohibition. Women are stepping up & stepping out. No more of that namby-pamby chivalry stuff!

 

Treat women like full human beings! Be prepared to follow their lead.

 

Stand & watch the play develop--like a pro middle linebacker; not like a JV nose tackle.

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Posted

 

I agree with the man up and do it face to face and all.

The big question is how do you deal with a woman that is slightly? psycho and has a large caliber pistol?


The problem with wimmens is that they have already gone over every possible thing that they could say and that you could say well in advance.

They are looking to trip you up, catch contradictions, and generally gain any advantage or information that they can.


Yet, they still want us to think that they are so sweet and innocent.


They are ready to ambush us and they lie in wait for the perfect moment to attack. When you are in the mood for love and not for talkin'.


Just refuse to play their game or by their rules.


You have to be prepared to walk away from the most amazing example of the Good Lord's artistry (for the evening), to maintain your sanity.


Better an occasional night alone, than a lifetime of "companionship" with a woman that you can't stand.

 

 

 

"refuse to play the game?"

 

Ask Kindness, Snoop, Bishop Don Magic Juan, about refusing to play the game. Naw, playa, it's about flipping it on 'em and shutting that mess down. Shut it down like Arthur Andersen, biyoch! Then draw up a whole new game that leaves folks cautious 'til they can scope out what's what.

 

By the time they find the groove, it's time to take 'em to the bridge, break it down, and let 'em know: where you thought the 1 was, is really the and-of-2.

 

It's aboout having a strong pimp hand. Just like a groove: rock steady, but potentially as ruthless as Perdie & Rainey ambushin' mo-fos in the backbeat.

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Posted

 

Just refuse to play their game or by their rules.


You have to be prepared to walk away from the most amazing example of the Good Lord's artistry (for the evening), to maintain your sanity.


Better an occasional night alone, than a lifetime of "companionship" with a woman that you can't stand.

 

 

 

There's still a little gaming going on but she will get from me what I want to give. I enjoy her company and all the "other stuff" but I could walk away. The only fly in the ointment is her brother is my best friend.

 

I know ALL ABOUT lonely nights. I'm the king of lonely nights.

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