Members dch528 Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 I'm an underaged bassist and I had the oppurtunity to go on a short trip with my older bandmates to play 2 weeks worth of shows. We had sponsors and the whole shebang. But due to my mother's stubborness she flat out said no with no reason why. She has never wanted to hear our music when it is presented. Never driven me to a show. Never helped me buy a piece of gear, and as a matter fact she's never heard me play my bass in the house because she can't stand the volume of my practice amp above 1. How do I get started if I have my main benefactor hates what I want to do with my life? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members burdizzos Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Graduate High School, get a job and move out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lokidecat Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Get head phones and practice with them. You have plenty of time to be a rock star. Don't let anyone stop you from dreaming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cdb Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Graduate High School, get a job and move out. +1. Exactly what I was gonna post... or, in the meantime, he could talk to Mom about why she gives no support, respect, etc. After he takes out the trash, and empties the litter boxes, of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members guitargod0dmw Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Finish school first... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rowka Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 You'll get no sympathy here. The fact is as a group bass players tend to be the most intelligent, mature, self-reliant, responsible members of any society in which they belong (Optimus Prime, JM5 and dch528 excluded. The Ox would have been excluded also, but he has shaped up nicely). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members burdizzos Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 The Ox would have been excluded also, but he has shaped up nicely. I'd hit it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members chunky-b Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 You'll get no sympathy here. The fact is as a group bass players tend to be the most intelligent, mature, self-reliant, responsible members of any society in which they belong (Optimus Prime, JM5 and dch528 excluded. The Ox would have been excluded also, but he has shaped up nicely). +1 I was about to suggest not to take any advice on the subject from Optimus Prime, :poke: but everyone else seems to be giving sound wisdom... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members SA Rios Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Graduate High School, get a job and move out. Thats the best advice. Either you are lucky and your parents support you, or they don't. If they don't, there is probably nothing you can do or say to make them think otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Renfield Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Graduate High School, get a job and move out. I didn't do it in that order, but it worked for me too. I had a job, moved out, graduated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members t3ch Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 How underage are we talking here? I don't expect you to see it from a parental standpoint, but if my 14 year old wanted to go on the road with with older musicians to play shows, I would probably concerned about the type of trouble he may get into. For all I know he would come back with herpes, hepatitis, 6 months probabation, and an affinity for smack. It's hard to give advice with so little information, but most of it isn't necessary: While it sounds like she's being unsupportive, there's not much you can do about it. Be thankful you can play out when you can, and that you have the ability to get there, afford your own gear, etc. My mom never let me go to concerts before I was 18, let alone play in one and it was impossible to find a job where I lived so I could never afford anything. Good luck; it's a whole new world when you're on your own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dch528 Posted August 14, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 You'll get no sympathy here. The fact is as a group bass players tend to be the most intelligent, mature, self-reliant, responsible members of any society in which they belong (Optimus Prime, JM5 and dch528 excluded. The Ox would have been excluded also, but he has shaped up nicely). I wasn't hoping for sympathy, because some guy on the web definitely can't validate my life. I was hoping to get an opinion from an experienced musician (because I know half of the geezers on this forum were raising hell in the 70's-90's) who may have been through some tough times starting out. The fact is as a group, bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be self righteous d-bags. Besides what more can I do, I work 8 hours a day in the summer, do all my chores, get decent grades during school, practice and sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members t3ch Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 The fact is as a group, bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be self righteous d-bags. Besides what more can I do, I work 8 hours a day in the summer, do all my chores, get decent grades during school, practice and sleep. So does that mean as a group, underage bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be whiny kids who know nothing about life if their biggest concern is not being able to go on a field trip? Just asking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members collinwho Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 So does that mean as a group, underage bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be whiny kids who know nothing about life if their biggest concern is not being able to go on a field trip?Just asking. That is how I read it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jugghaid Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Unfortunately, parents don't need to give you a reason. They're the boss, like it or not. I know it can suck, but fact is, I wouldn't let my son do that either when he was still in school. I was plenty supportive, bought him his first set of drums, got him lessons, etc. But no way in hell was a minor that I'm responsible for going out on the road for 2 weeks. Now he's 22 and works full time and can do whatever he damn well pleases. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dch528 Posted August 14, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 So does that mean as a group, underage bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be whiny kids who know nothing about life if their biggest concern is not being able to go on a field trip?Just asking. Yes! But seriously I have been taking on the responsibilities of an adult for a long time, and maybe I just wanted to go on one little field trip in my youth before changing from a whiney kid to a whiney adult. And maybe I wanted as much validation as a player as everyone else here. 16 if you were wondering Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lokidecat Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 And maybe I wanted as much validation as a player as everyone else here. You won't get far in life assuming things like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Optimus Prime Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Deal with it. If the worst thing you mom is doing to you is not letting you drive around with your friends for 2 weeks to play music with no supervison then you've got it pretty good. My mom made me pay electric bills because I was the only person spending time at her house, tried to pawn my basses, effects and amp and called the cops because I was fixing her house. We haven't talked in months. This is the last thing you need to be worrying about with school starting in a few days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 I wasn't hoping for sympathy, because some guy on the web definitely can't validate my life. I was hoping to get an opinion from an experienced musician (because I know half of the geezers on this forum were raising hell in the 70's-90's) who may have been through some tough times starting out. The fact is as a group, bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be self righteous d-bags. Besides what more can I do, I work 8 hours a day in the summer, do all my chores, get decent grades during school, practice and sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members collinwho Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Yes! But seriously I have been taking on the responsibilities of an adult for a long time, and maybe I just wanted to go on one little field trip in my youth before changing from a whiney kid to a whiney adult. And maybe I wanted as much validation as a player as everyone else here. 16 if you were wondering I'm only 25, and know absolutely nothing about raising a teenager, etc, but if were your parent, I wouldn't have let you go either. At 16, you have plenty of time left for short tours (and even long tours if you can pull it off). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 So does that mean as a group, underage bass players posting on a forum and becoming smart ass KIA's behind the veil of the interweb instead of practicing their instrument, tend to be whiny kids who know nothing about life if their biggest concern is not being able to go on a field trip? Just asking. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JacieFB Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 With respect to your parent not letting you go, it sucks, but it's what you have to work with. It sucks, but it is. As to the no support thing, I hear you. I've been playing music for 13 years. My parents went to a couple of shows back in 1998 when I first started in original music. Since then, my mom started going to shows a couple of years ago and realized that she was actually missing out on something great. My dad hasn't been to a show since 1998. I give him CDs and I find them unopened on his kitchen table under piles of old junk mail. Eventually, you'll have to educate your parents on how you wanted to be treated like an adult. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like you're an adult yet. Count your blessings. I wasn't even allowed to go to a concert until I was 18 and I still had to raise hell to make it happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RIC N BACKER Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 I'm an underaged bassist and I had the oppurtunity to go on a short trip with my older bandmates to play 2 weeks worth of shows. We had sponsors and the whole shebang. But due to my mother's stubborness she flat out said no with no reason why. She has never wanted to hear our music when it is presented. Never driven me to a show. Never helped me buy a piece of gear, and as a matter fact she's never heard me play my bass in the house because she can't stand the volume of my practice amp above 1. How do I get started if I have my main benefactor hates what I want to do with my life? Why doesnt She even want to hear your music? at 16 I can understand her reluctance to let you go away for 2 weeks but if you have been a responsible kid thus far I am not sure thats fair. at 16 I could have gone out and not gotten into trouble that would have ruined my future. thats not to say I wouldnt have made bad choices. I just wouldnt have gotten caught! lol Your Mother doesnt have to like what you want to do with your life. She does have a say in what you do with it while under her roof. I am 44 years old. I have had a rewarding career for the last 23 years. My mother is only finally coming around to the fact that my job is relevant and a good choice. on the music front, when I was 15 I asked for lessons to learn how to play bass. My mother said she would pay for guitar lessons not bass. I thought {censored} that I want to play bass but she wouldnt pay for bass.Her reasons, I found out just a few years ago, was she thought that bass wasnt an instrument I could play without a band and I would get more out of guitar. I still think , well {censored} you I am a bass player. we will see who has the final laugh when I put her in a cheap ass nursing home instead of a really nice one....lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dch528 Posted August 14, 2008 Author Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 Deal with it. If the worst thing you mom is doing to you is not letting you drive around with your friends for 2 weeks to play music with no supervison then you've got it pretty good. My mom made me pay electric bills because I was the only person spending time at her house, tried to pawn my basses, effects and amp and called the cops because I was fixing her house. We haven't talked in months. This is the last thing you need to be worrying about with school starting in a few days. Not to get into a my life is worser than thou feud, but I do pay bills, and feed my siblings, and get precious {censored} left to me from my now disabled father sold or broken, and I get kicked out of my house every so often for stupid {censored} like eating bacon and folding laundry while I was supposed to be taking out trash. But other than that I'm content. For those of you who have had the pleasure , how do you handle the showerless days, and cramped van and other downsides of a mostly DIY tour. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Renfield Posted August 14, 2008 Members Share Posted August 14, 2008 How underage are we talking here? I don't expect you to see it from a parental standpoint, but if my 14 year old wanted to go on the road with with older musicians to play shows, I would probably concerned about the type of trouble he may get into. For all I know he would come back with herpes, hepatitis, 6 months probabation, and an affinity for smack. I should know, I'm still addicted and I have the Clap and genital warts on top of that too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.