Jump to content

Musicians that should not be allowed!


Outkaster

Recommended Posts

  • Members

Drunks and Druggies.. No place for them in my bands. If you can't play straight..play with someone else.

 

Big ego.. Leave it home. You can't bull{censored} guys who have been playing with you for years..we know the truth.

 

Prima Donna.. Sorry, if you are too stupid to notice the dance floor emptied out while you were in the middle of a ten minute solo and nobody clapped when you were done..not interested.

 

Any musician that thinks dynamics means his amp goes to 11, his drums need to be the loudest thing on stage all the time, etc. Sorry, go play with kids who are too stupid to realize they won't be able to hear in ten years.

 

Any musician that feels the need to use profanity in the PA. Find a band that thinks it's cool, check back in a couple years to see how you did..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 85
  • Created
  • Last Reply
  • Members

 

Originally posted by NecroSocial

Lead vocalists who sing out of tune and insist it's because they can't hear themselves over the music.

 

 

{censored} maybe thats because you cant sing in tune when you cant hear yourself?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

How about any band that does "THE BIGGG ENDINGGGG" all the time...

 

(triple turnaround, baa baa baa baa badada bump BUMMMMMMMM(big flapping drum solo...every lick he knows...big flapping guitar solos...all guitar players playing every lick they know or whamming on a 9th chord for 2 minutes)...

 

Meanwhile, the dancefloor clears except for tumbleweeds...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

 

Originally posted by jahozer

drummers who "solo" in between songs. Especially at practice.

Or drummers who bang the drums when your head is next to them wrapping up cables or whatever.

 

 

That annoys me more than anything on this planet. I was playing in a prog-metal band, and whenever me, the guitarist and the keyboardist were trying to work things out, the asshole drummer did that. It came to the point where I could'nt take the guy anymore, and I left the band.

 

Also, when you asked him to stop he would throw a small tantrum. He seriously would throw down his sticks and tell us to play without him if that's how we were going to be.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

You guys make me appreciate my band more and more every time I read one of these threads. I agree with nearly everything posted so far.

 

Egos - When you're sitting in for Mick Jagger, I'll give you a slight pass. Until then STFU. We've had two ego problems in the 20 year history of our band. We fired both of them.

 

Drummers - Well, we call our drummer "Phill" sometimes because he can get a bit carried away but his personality, energy level and "cool personness" give him a pass.

 

Bass players - I love my bass player. He is solid, reliable, low-key, experienced, professional, skilled... I could go on and on.

 

Harmonica players - We went through two of them and well, I'll stop now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Originally posted by ratthedd

Musicians who recognize that they really should be practicing at home on their own time then refuse to do so and make up lame excuses for why they didn't.

 

It's the ones who don't even bother coming up with an excuse that pi$$ me off more :mad:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

 

Originally posted by Never_Grew_Up

Guitarists with 15 battery powered effects & no extra batteries.


Same as above but they never change their batteries so their effects sound like crap because there's not enough juice left in their crappy Big Lots 10 for a dollar batteries.


Guitarists who constantly buy/trade effects so they're always learning how their new gizmo works during rehearsals/gigs.


All players who don't bring extra cables/batteries/strings/tools.


All players with no basic troubleshooting skills - "Follow the signal path to figure out how to make the sound come out"


All players who don't mute when they tune.


All players who only know the opening lick to a song but insist on trying to figure out the rest during rehearsal. (Also goes for singers & lyrics)


All players who won't listen when the sound guy says they're too loud on stage.


Hey, this is kinda fun...

 

 

That would be my guitarist at a show we had sat night. He never tweaks his {censored} so it ends up all distorted. We made a dvd of it and it sounds terrible or at least his {censored} does.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Originally posted by Tedster

How about any band that does "THE BIGGG ENDINGGGG" all the time...


(triple turnaround, baa baa baa baa badada bump BUMMMMMMMM(big flapping drum solo...every lick he knows...big flapping guitar solos...all guitar players playing every lick they know or whamming on a 9th chord for 2 minutes)...


Meanwhile, the dancefloor clears except for tumbleweeds...

 

you've seen us, then...? :D

 

You forgot to add "and the bassplayer's eyes roll up into his head and he begins to contemplate sticking his tongue into an AC outlet..."

 

t from j

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Keyboardists (especially in Top 40 bands) that play cheesy preset horn sounds drenched in reverb from their Triton/Motif/Fantom.

 

Actually any keyboardist that plays preset keyboard patches that are programmed to be drenched in reverb (ESPECIALLY when it's added to the natural reverb of the room). Eugh! I hate that!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

 

Originally posted by Outkaster



Yeah that is a good one.

 

 

Thank you. Especially bass players that don't understand the power of incorporating space in their playing and the importance of "On The One"

 

I got so pissed at bass players like that, I decided to pick up bass myself!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

No hats on stage, unless your a C and W act.

No shorts on stage ever.

Keep your feet off the monitor.

Please don't change your strings 5 minutes before the

show.

No sandals on stage.

Leave your 100 watt whatever amp at home, or better

yet sell it to some fool on ebay.

Practice your ass off.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Guitar players that have sudden problems with equipment when they're obviously clueless about what they're required to play. "The Technician"

 

The guy who shows up late for practice with his CD player and CD's in hand - who is oblivious to the fact that what he heard when he walked in the door is probably what's on tonight's work list - who is completely oblivious to the fact that more time is passing while he hasn't played a note yet - and is obviously far too enthusiastic about his tune suggestions - and, after fumbling with the CD player for ten mintues, makes everyone listen to another tune that no one can dance to. "The Hijacker"

 

The trumpet player who likes the those high notes. "The Screecher"

 

The trombone player who uses the scoop-and-pull method to locate notes. You know, play it a little lower than you should and pull the slide in a bit until you find the note. "The Slider"

 

The horn player who thinks full Chicago style horn sections are suitable for any song. "The Arranger"

 

Geesh - didn't think I let this stuff bother me so much until I started to dump it here. Good thread. Great therapy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Oh yeah... one more.

 

The guy who can't stick to a set list - who starts playing the next song of his choosing without letting the rest of the band in on his obviously superior choice of tunes. "The Hijacker" - again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Originally posted by GCDEF



Why should singers own PAs?

 

As the frontman for both my bands, I think the singer should at least have enough PA gear to amplify vocals for rehearsal. As TA Hall pointed out, it would be the same as your guitarist showing up expecting the rest of the band to provide him with an amp.

 

In my opinion, this responsibility ends when playing out. It was brought up earlier about being compensated for owning the PA. If a band member provides the entire PA for gigs, he or she should receive (in my opinion) 5-15% off the top of each gig. Maintaining a PA is a huge expense, both in money and effort. This is why I prefer to let a pro take care of our sound (that, and I want to sound good - nothing beats a knowledgable soundtech :D)

 

One could argue that other band members have a lot of money invested in gear, however, each member should be responsible for producing their own instrument - the PA covers everybody. I wouldn't expect the rest of my band to pay to re-tube my guitar amp, but I would expect them to chip in to replace a blown PA speaker.

 

Having a fixed percentage coming off the top is the best solution. If something breaks, you don't have to be hounding the band to pay up. Likewise, the other members of the band never need to worry about coming up with money to fix something.

 

Of course, this system only works if the owner of the PA actually uses the money for its intended purpose :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


×
×
  • Create New...