Members dughaze Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Okay, so I'm 47 and I'm trying to get a band going again for the last year and a half after not playing for 15 years. I've been reading everybody's tips and it is unbelievably hard to find and keep other musicians. At my age they have either burnt out long ago, become alcoholics, too out of shape, or are handicapped by whatever social or menatl disorder you can think of. As a matter of fact, I remember the same kind of crap back when I was 24 to 30 and playing in bands so there isn't really much more difference except more of us are dead or have sold their equipment. There is still the same shortage of decent bass players just like back then too. My wife is very supportive because she knows how much I love playing. It also seems like the other guys either don't have wives because they got tired of the dudes having the social and mental disorders and addictions (they're divorced), or the wives don't want them to play so that squashes the guy's creativity or desire to play. So I'm hatin the wives of the guys my age too. Okay, I'll shutup. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members GCDEF Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I'm 46, married with kids and gigging 4 or 5 times a month. Could gig a lot more if I wanted to. My 50 year old bass player is married with an 18 month old daughter. He seems to be able to get out and play as much as he wants too. The other two guys aren't married, but they're in their forties. I must be very lucky, because they're all very easy to work with, sane and reasonably sober. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members fastplant Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 You guys are as old as my dad! I see nothing wrong with gigging at your age. Actually, I wish my dad would still play. He thinks he's too old and gave it up. I hope I'm playing until I physically can't play anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members P.Bagley Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Another 46 year old, this time a bass player. I had my share of wife interferiance, including a bout of "I don't want you to play in bars". But I hung in there and kept on playing. One thing I've done since picking the bass back up 15 years ago is play in church every chance I get. Of course all church gigs are pretty much pre-approved. A funny thing happened a few years ago. My wife's boss recruited me into his band. Neither one of them work there any more, but my wife has grown to trust the whole situation over time. I'm the youngest, all are married and have been for a very long time, and we only play once or twice a month. That seems to work, especially if I show consideration for Family Plans before booking gigs. So the best advice I can give you is to find stable older musicians who's wives like to come to shows once in a while. Add them to the list of couples you and your wife socialize with. They are tough to find, and you'll never get to perfection with such a group due to a general lack of time for practice and limited gigs booked. But you'll have fun and in time learn to accept your limitations. All the best, - Paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members zookie Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Don't lose hope! I'm 40 and play out almost weekly. My view of what it is to gig has changed a lot since I was 20. The gigs are earlier in the evening or during afternoons now. I'm much more insistent on fair compensation and less interested in a free beer. I ducked the whole jealous spouse thing by marrying a wonderful musician who gigs with me. It's tough getting something off the ground. Stick to your vision, though, and it will happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Brian Krashpad Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by fastplant I hope I'm playing until I physically can't play anymore. That's my plan. I'm 47. The secret: take a short nap in the middle of a long song: If these little concessions to age are made, one can keep gigging for quite awhile. BK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jimi Ray Halen Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 My situation seems very similar to yours. I got back into it a couple of years ago. Tried putting together something with my old buds - big mistake. Those guys were burnt. They never left the party. So I put together my own thing using the internet. Worked for about two years before things came apart at the seams but we were good. But that time allowed me to get back out there and play live, knock the rust off, meet some people, etc. So between that and taking lessons from a guru, I was ready to step up when a band was looking for a guitarist. I went on a few auditions and found a group of guys that: a. seem mature and stable b. want to gig p/t c. want to do the same types of music d. have their wives' permission e. aren't smoking crack or getting drunk every day f. realize that the "rock star" thing ain't gonna happen g. want to have fun and sound good (and put in the work required) My wife enjoys going out so that works out fine. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you are doing the right thing. Don't give up. I didn't even realize how much I missed it until I got back up there. Once you catch the bug there ain't no looking back. I plan on doing this as long as I am able to and in 5 years I can retire and go full time. And if I wouldn't have gotten back into it I'd probably be a miserable mf'er yelling at the TV or something when I'm old. There's always a place for a good player. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members maxnew40 Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I am 43 and still gigging regularly. It is a litter harder finding a band cause the younger guys don't want you in the band regardless of your talent level. I was even told by one band that it was really neat that a gut my age was still into current rock music Finding a decent band is hard work and can get a bit frustrating at times. Try to find a place that has bands that are closer to your age and get the word out among them that you are looking for a band. Use internet resources like Craig's List and so on. Good luck. Max Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members flemtone Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Don't lose hope! All is not lost!!! 48 here, play in two bands, mix sound for others, run an Open Mic every Thursday, have been playing in the same bar for almost 20 years, and haven't stopped playing since I first picked up the bass in 1974. One of the reasons is that I play with essentially the same people I've played with since the mid-70s. We're like a family (in fact, sometimes CLOSER than family). We're there to pick up the pieces of each others' broken relationships, layoffs, teen-kid problems, etc. "Never give up. Never surrender". Time for my nap now...then some gruel. peace, Tim from Jersey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dughaze Posted October 12, 2005 Author Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Man, keeop it coming. I am busy here at work working some issues but I'm going to check back on this stuff a little later. So there is hope huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members THB Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by dughaze Man, keeop it coming. I am busy here at work working some issues but I'm going to check back on this stuff a little later. So there is hope huh? There's always hope, brutha! I'm 43 and leader of an original project, in which I'm the youngest player. We've got wives, kids, ex-wives, girlfriends, ex-girlfriends and various would-be's and wanna-be's. The names change, but the stories are always the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dughaze Posted October 12, 2005 Author Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I've got to stick with it I guess. I've got the drummer from our old band and we agree to just do a 3 piece for now or until another singer or maybe guitar or keyboard come along, though I'm fine with singing and playing guitars so far. But we still haven't found a bass player yet. I'm not a great singer and I really need to tune down a half step to help my lower range vocals. That has caused some friction understandably going to another tuning and I kinda understand it...plus I think if I was better at playing and singing it would be easier to keep or get others. Deep down I know with the right guys we would sound really good but meeting those guys is quite a job. I don't want to hang out in bars every night looking either. I'll keep trying the Craig's List and the local website. I've sent out so many ads bumping mine to the top that THAT is getting old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JacieFB Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by Jimi Ray Halen So I put together my own thing using the internet. What is this 'internet' that you speak of? Sincerely, though. I'm having a hell of a time finding a guitarist. I seem to have a knack for finding ones that self-destruct with self-doubt, self-loathing, no fortitude, suppressed racist agendas, undisclosed (even to them) children/child support responsibilities, and ever-increasing lack of skill. The seem like good guys in the beginning! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Roy Brooks Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I am 43 and play as often as possible. It is all I do. I am married to a wonderful woman who, like me, did not want to have kids. I am in several bands, mostly with cats right around my age, some of whom have wives and girlfriends. They are all really cool folks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wheresgrant3 Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I'm a little younger... 35... but just getting to the age that my legs are sore the very next day (Maybe I'm getting too old for floor slides ). At 35 I wonder if I'll still be gigging 6-7 times a month. (I'm on the right) Then I look at our guitarist.. 43, divorced, heart and soul into Stevie Ray yet he rips whether playing Prince, Blink182 or Metallica. He's playing for the biggest crowds he's ever played for (100-800 per nite) and he's having a blast. His twin daughters just turned 21 one and we just gigged in their college town last weekend. Their friends said they had the coolest dad in the world. He likes to hear that. the funny thing is we rescued this guy from a not so successful wedding band. Looks liuke he's slipping backwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members GCDEF Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by wheresgrant3 Their friends said they had the coolest dad in the world. He likes to hear that. That's another fun perc. My daughters came to a gig a few weeks ago, and they were calling all their friends holding their cell phones up to the speakers so their friends could hear. From what I understand having teenage daughters that brag about their parents is kind of rare, so I consider myself lucky in that regard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members CloseEnoughRocks Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I just turned 47, and gig almost every weekend. In my area, it seems most people playing in the classier clubs are older. The dives are populated by all ages. I answered an ad for my current band. The one before that was through word of mouth. The two before that were jam situtations that turned into gigging bands. Don't forget to answer the ads at your local music stores. And hit the clubs you want to play and introduce yourself to bands that you'd like to be in - you never know when a member is leaving. One thing I'll never do again is to start a band from scratch. PA issues, finding work issues, getting everyone to learn all the songs - forget it. From now on, I'll only join an established band with work already lined up. SR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members caveman Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I'm pushing 58 and still at it. That's me with the Strat. I've lost 50 lbs since that pic was taken earlier this year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Terry Allan Hall Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by Brian Krashpad That's my plan. I'm 47. The secret: take a short nap in the middle of a long song: If these little concessions to age are made, one can keep gigging for quite awhile. BK LOL...if you're ever out in West Texas, look me up...I owe you at least one beer! 49 (going on 17) and gig (solo) 3-5X a week, w/ trio 2-3X per month, except for the holidays (Thanksgiving until New Years) when I gig tons more! Too lazy to get a real job and can't afford the step-down in $$$. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Terry Allan Hall Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by JacieFB Sincerely, though. I'm having a hell of a time finding a guitarist. I seem to have a knack for finding ones that self-destruct with self-doubt, self-loathing, no fortitude, suppressed racist agendas, undisclosed (even to them) children/child support responsibilities, and ever-increasing lack of skill. The seem like good guys in the beginning! That's a whole bunch of why I mostly gig solo... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tucktronix Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by caveman I'm pushing 58 and still at it. That's me with the Strat. I've lost 50 lbs since that pic was taken earlier this year. The sign "Coupe De Ville"...? Is that the name of your band? We have a band here in Rochester, NY with a similiar name of, "The Coupe De Villes". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members caveman Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Originally posted by tucktronix The sign "Coupe De Ville"...? Is that the name of your band? We have a band here in Rochester, NY with a similiar name of, "The Coupe De Villes". Yeah, I've been using that since the late 70s. Picking a band name is such a pain the the butt that I've never changed it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Casper Cliche Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I just saw UK SUBS on saturday, and they were amazing. Proof that age shouldnt be a factor in how long you play. their singer is i believe just past 60. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DaveH Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 I'm 50, and just started gigging again after a 15 year job to get my life together. I gigged the regional small club circuit for almost 20 years before that, staring when I was about 16. I got burned out and the music wasn't making me happy anymore, so I quit. Since I started playing again(about a year now), my life has become almost totaly immersed in music. I'm playing with 3 different groups, and I'm having the time of my life. I feel like I'm playing better than ever, learning more(no internet back then) every day. There's plenty of players where I am, but hanging on to the good ones can be difficult because there's just too much demand for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Spudro Posted October 12, 2005 Members Share Posted October 12, 2005 Caveman's got me beat by a couple years, but I'm 50 and right now I play 2 nights every week. I had quit playing out since '81 (when I was 26) because I chose an opportunity that forced me to give up gigging at least temporarily. I made the right decision, but I deeply missed gigging and I had no idea when or how I could return to it. One day a couple years back I struck up a conversation with a guy who was noodling around on a guitar in a new English Pub in our area. He wasn't hired entertainment, he was just picking blues licks on an acoustic guitar like he was trying out the guitar. He was so impressive I just had to compliment him on it. During out short chat he told me that he played at that Pub every Thursday night and it was a Blues Jam. He encouraged me to bring out my guitar and sit in. I've been going to that jam ever since. With some time and some homework invested I got my chops and timing back in decent control. Now I am a member of the core band and I get paid ($50) for that night. That gig has led to other things and now I also have a paid gig ($50) at another club on Monday nights. I also have an "always welcome" sit in spot at two other Blues Jam spots on Tuesday nights and Friday nights. Blues Jam gigs are very cool to me. I like how many musicians I get to play with and how many friends I have made. I beleive that it has made me a better musician than ever because of how many different tone and technique situations I have to adapt to on the fly. I am playing music for fun and I like it that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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