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Opinions--I get subbed for at every big event


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Wanted to get some different opinions on this, to see if I am overly sensitive or have a right to be ticked...

 

I play "lead" guitar (really a combination of lead and rhythm) in a band consisting of singer, acoustic guitar, me, bass and drums. The wrinkle here is that our band's main "gig" is to lead worship at our church every Sunday. The current group has basically been together for about four years.

 

Over the last year and a half or so, the band member who is "in charge" of the band has started having someone else fill in for me at big events. NOT having someone else who plays with our band fill in, or someone else in our church fill in, but bringing in friends and acquaintances of his from out of town to fill in. For example, the band had a big weekend long event last weekend, and the band leader had another guitar player/old acquaintance of his come in from out of town to take my spot.

 

Now, just by way of background, I am no Van Halen/Satriani/etc....but the best word I can use to describe my playing is "solid," meaning I do what's needed, copy exactly the album versions of the songs we do, don't mess up, etc. What I don't do is rip blazing solos--however, the worship context is a little different than traditional performance situations, because blazing guitar solos are not usually a part of leading worship (some exceptions, of course). Like many in the praise & worship genre, I copy my style a lot more off of the Edge than Van Halen.

 

Apparently, though, our "band leader" has become enamored of the blazing guitar solo and wants to make sure we have them at big events--so he brings in out of town guitar players. The guy who filled in last weekend was definitely from the blazing guitar solo school--and, I might add, was considerably more talented than anyone else in our band.

 

Here's the deal: if I just stunk it up, or were behind the rest of the band talent-wise, I could at least comprehend feeling the need to bring in fill-ins for big events. But it is not much fun pouring hours and hours of work into something, being replaced at every big (read: fun) event--nor is it much fun knowing that I would be replaced in a heartbeat if our "leader" had the chance or if some of the individuals who have filled in were to move to our town.

 

So, am I overly sensitive? Or have a right to be mad? To me, there is a certain value on loyalty. As long as someone is carrying their weight, and at the same point as the rest of the band talent-wise, what our "leader" is doing seems disloyal to me. Seems like there ought to be an element of loyalty/teamwork/not having to constantly be looking over your shoulder.

 

Or maybe I just have my panties in a wad. Oh well, just needed to vent, my wife is getting tired of hearing about it.

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Wanted to get some different opinions on this, to see if I am overly sensitive or have a right to be ticked...


I play "lead" guitar (really a combination of lead and rhythm) in a band consisting of singer, acoustic guitar, me, bass and drums. The wrinkle here is that our band's main "gig" is to lead worship at our church every Sunday. The current group has basically been together for about four years.


Over the last year and a half or so, the band member who is "in charge" of the band has started having someone else fill in for me at big events. For example, the band had a big weekend long event last weekend, and the band leader had another guitar player come in from out of town to take my spot.


Now, just by way of background, I am no Van Halen/Satriani/etc....but the best word I can use to describe my playing is "solid," meaning I do what's needed, copy exactly the album versions of the songs we do, don't mess up, etc. What I don't do is rip blazing solos--however, the worship context is a little different than traditional performance situations, because blazing guitar solos are not usually a part of leading worship (some exceptions, of course).


Apparently, though, our "band leader" has become enamored of the blazing guitar solo and wants to make sure we have them at big events--so he brings in out of town guitar players. The guy who filled in last weekend was definitely from the blazing guitar solo school--and, I might add, is
considerably
more talented than anyone else in our band.


Here's the deal: if I just stunk it up, or were behind the rest of the band talent-wise, I could at least comprehend feeling the need to bring in fill-ins for big events. But it is not much fun pouring hours and hours of work into something, being replaced at every big event--nor is it much fun knowing that I would be replaced in a heartbeat if our "leader" had the chance or if some of the individuals who have filled in were to move to our town.

 

 

This is an oddity (for me) beacuse you're a worship/services band and not a traditional 'play out for gigs' band...

 

If you're a 'band' in that everyone gets a fair say in things, you should be PO'd, and take it up with the guy bringing in the soloists.

If he's the MD/calls all the shots, and feels a hot-shot guitar player is needed, there may be nothing you can do. I'd still bring it up with him so I could understand his thoughts on the matter.

 

Ultimately, if it's deemed that such a player is needed, either step up your playing or accept the occasional sub, I guess.

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We're only hearing one side of the story, but I can see why you'd be upset. You are putting in the same amount of work as everyone else and not getting the same "reward". Have you talked to him about this and let him know how you feel? Without knowing how he responds to this it is hard to know what I would do. If his thought was he was going to continue to do it this way you'll either have to accept it or decide to move on.

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It's not a "sub" unless you ask for it. It's a "replacement", temporary or otherwise, in your case.

 

 

This. I'd be pissed off if I were you, and I'd talk to the guy about it and let him know that if you put the time into being in this band, you expect to be there at all the big events. The only acceptable time to use a "sub" is if you can't make a gig.

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You have described this as a worship/praise band. As such, and being part of a church, I would suggest asking for a meeting with the entire band and include the church minister in the meeting. At the meeting express your feelings to the assembly and try to have a reasonbly unheated discussion of the situation. At worst, if the entire band is in favor of the "guest" guitarists at special events such guitarist should be an addition to you, not a replacement. If this doesn't bring a solution to the problem it might be time to look around for another church home.

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I think your band is out of line. I've played in worship bands for years and I could see adding an additional guitar player for an event but have never heard of replacing an existing member. I don't know why they couldn't add his friend and still include you. I'm sure you both would be able to stay out of each other's way...in fact, it would probably sound pretty good.

 

It would definitely bug me enough to consider quitting.

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Start looking for another band and leave the one you're in on short notice as soon as you've joined the new one.

 

agreed. They don't respect you at all. You're, in their/his eyes, a backup in a tight pinch. You're the guy that they can say "yeah he'll be there every Sunday" but they leave you out to dry when it comes to really "performing " instead of being the "buffer" music on Sundays.

 

Quit, get into a better band, profit :thu:

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I see several different options:

 

1. Accept the status quo. If you enjoy playing in the praise band and real gigs aren't important to you, then do this.

 

2. Let the other members of the band except the "leader" know that you want to play all of the gigs and see what their position is. If they agree with you, have the band (other than the leader) let the leader know that you will be playing all gigs from now on. This will work IF the others agree with you AND someone other than the "leader" also books gigs. If the others don't agree with you, choose either option 1 or 3.

 

3. Choose not to accept the status quo and tell the "leader" that either you play all of the gigs or you'll play none of the gigs. You may end up playing all of the gigs, but more likely will end up playing none of the gigs.

 

It really comes down to the dynamics of the band. Is it "The leader and the followers" or "Band X".

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I see several different options:


1. Accept the status quo. If you enjoy playing in the praise band and real gigs aren't important to you, then do this.

 

 

That's the problem. I'm busting my butt week after week, and then when we have a chance to have a little fun, "adios."

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How would your band leader feel if he were replaced for big events because the band wanted a more experienced leader? I am not religious in any way but I do try to live my life by the golden rule. As I understand it it goes something like this: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Your band leader sounds like an insensitive tool to me.

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I have not read the whole thread carefully, so I have to ask, do you get paid? Are you a hired member of the band, if so, then other criteria apply.

 

If you are not a hired gun and the situation is viewed by everyone as a band that has a leader, then this plus 1. You may be looking for a new band sooner rather than later.

 

 

This. I'd be pissed off if I were you, and I'd talk to the guy about it and let him know that if you put the time into being in this band, you expect to be there at all the big events. The only acceptable time to use a "sub" is if you can't make a gig.

 

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Oh,This rings so true,

I would have a meeting.with all the members of the group..

If you play all the time in this group,Then by all means call a meeting.

If it gets you nowhere,then start looking for a new church...I did !!

Never looked back either,I had the music director decide to change music

after the service had started.gee sorry i played the organ for service.

Only took me two seconds to turn it off lock it up and step out..

Had a meeting later in the week.to funny music goes with the sermen not what the dirctor things will be better.i won ,but never offer to play again.

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I would just say that you're fine with adding an additional guitarist for the bigger events, but you'd still like to be part of it and that you're willing to augment your playing to make room for the 2nd guitar. I wouldn't be confrontational about it.

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The leader is being as disrespectful and insulting as possible. To me it's saying "you're not good enough for the big shows" without having the balls to say it openly, and instead he just cuts you out . My response would be "go {censored} yourself"

 

 

And, "good luck getting one of your hot shots to wake up early every Sunday"...

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