Members LeonardScaper Posted May 11, 2015 Members Share Posted May 11, 2015 I just finished up something that was a bit more uptempo and electric (check my link if you're curious about that one) and I made myself the same two promises that I seem to make every time these days. 1. I'm going to take a real beak and give my ears a rest. .....and....... 2. At least I'm going to get back to basics and do a nice mellow acoustic piece without all that foolish production. I posted that tune on my SoundClick page and went out for a run in the early light of dawn to clear my head. It was warm....sultry even...and it felt like rain that I knew was not coming. As I ran I slipped into a mantra.....bring the rain...1, 2,......bring the rain....3, 4.....bring the rain....1, 2......bring the rain...3, 4........bring the rain...1, 2.....bring the rain....3, 4...... It was a good run and when I got home I, of course, fired up the gear and tracked an acoustic guitar. The thing is, though....I really do need a break. Or maybe I just need some help with this one........... Bring the rainAnd wash me down the riverBring the rainAnd roll me in the mudBring the rainI got nothing left to giveSo bring the rainBring the flood That's all I've got. Anybody want in on this one? *smile* Is it a "drought tune"? A "been raining for a week already so just bring it all and get it over with" tune? a "stand up to the wrath of nature" tune? Hmmmmm........ I'll post some of that guitar thing tonight for reference to that mantra-like cadence that I had going on. *wave* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted May 11, 2015 Members Share Posted May 11, 2015 I like the rhythm of the words. It sounds like it could be a good hook/chorus. I would think about changing "I got nothing left to give" unless that turns out to be a key phrase. For now it kinda stands out in a "which of these things is not like the other?" sort of way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 11, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 11, 2015 Yeah....definitely not married to any of those early lyrics....and that one in particular tends to be a bit too cliche right off. Here's some music. I actually sang that mantra thing in during the guitar tracking thinking that it was just a scratch track....but I like the tone of the guitar so I will be keeping it. That should be interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 12, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Thinking the "angry at the storm version" tonight. Bring the rainAnd wash me down the riverBring the rainThen roll me in the mudBring the rainIf that's all you got to giveThen bring itpauseBring the flood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Hi Lenny - great to hear some of your stuff again.The rhythm of those 3 chords with that bit of lyric work perfectly - so keep it coming - whatever you want to write about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Hi Lenny - great to hear some of your stuff again. The rhythm of those 3 chords with that bit of lyric work perfectly - so keep it coming - whatever you want to write about. Yes! it's always nice when you show up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tbry Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 I just tried to find a common thread to what you have going...please disregard if this is way out of line... Bring the rainAnd wash me down the riverBring the rainThen roll me in the mudBring the rainIf that's all you got to giveThen bring itpauseBring the flood Bring the changeClean me up I want to live (or something else)Bring the changeRoll me in crimson bloodBring the changeThere is nothing to forgiveThen bring itpauseBring the flood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 12, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 I just tried to find a common thread to what you have going...please disregard if this is way out of line.. .Bring the change Clean me up I want to live (or something else) Bring the change Roll me in crimson blood Bring the change There is nothing to forgive Then bring it pause Bring the flood I like this a lot. I do end up writing about change a whole lot so some of this works perfectly as the guts of the second verse. I was already also strongly considering using "blood" in there.....as..."wash me in the blood", even though that does have a slight religious connotation and that is not a direction in which I would generally go. Maybe..... Bring the change 'Cause there's nothing to forgive So bring the rain And wash me in the blood Change That is what we live for (don't much like that) So bring it pause Bring the flood *THUNDER* (checking the weather outlook for thunder storms) Instrumental I just scratched in that second verse......time to get ready for work now. Hmmmmm....this song may actually be called "Bring The Flood". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rsadasiv Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 That's another good one Lenny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Foose31 Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Maybe..... Bring the change 'Cause there's nothing to forgive So bring the rain And wash me in the blood Change That's all we can pray for So bring it pause Bring the flood *THUNDER* (checking the weather outlook for thunder storms) Instrumental I just scratched in that second verse......time to get ready for work now. http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13121195 Hmmmmm....this song may actually be called "Bring The Flood". Like it alot..can't wait to hear more. Made a suggestion to the line that your not crazy about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rhino55 Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 This is cool. I really like "roll me in the mud." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 12, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Made a suggestion to the line that your not crazy about. Thanks......but with the line in that position I'm hoping to keep coming back to the "river" lyric in V1. There is going to be a third important verse a little later on where we need to hit on "river/give/forgive" and "mud/blood/flood" again. It may get challenging. I have some ideas for the refrain that comes after the instrumental.....I'll get into that tonight. I think the refrain will be a pivotal point where the real message comes across and it gets repeated before the end. Of course, I don't quite have that message in sharp focus just yet..... Hey, Ram!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mbfrancis Posted May 12, 2015 Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 Hey this is very cool, what a great concept. I think it's a great start - I think the challenge will be figuring out where this is going. Bring the rain to do xxxx...and basically xxxx will evolve, adding depth and complexity as you go, revealing more. E.g., you keep washing stuff away until at the end you reveal you're washing away the blood of the unfaithful woman you killed in a rage. Or something like that. That's how I'd do it. Very cool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 12, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 This is cool. I really like "roll me in the mud." I was actually struggling with that line but I agree now that it feels right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 12, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 12, 2015 I think the challenge will be figuring out where this is going Definitely. It is beginning to come into focus as a combination of resolute determination in the face of adversity and a bit of equally resolute acceptance of the inevitable....might as well bring the flood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 13, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 So...the refrain.....*smile* As I sketched in these lyrics I felt the power that comes from the acceptance of one's own mortality....my own mortality. I think that may be a great part of what this song is about. This link is just the refrain. I am hoping for some comments as to how this message might be improved upon......and then some ideas for the all important third verse. You can change someIf you light your fireOr when the rain comesYou can get a little higher But I hear that thunderI hear that soundSo I'm going downTo the hallowed ground Bring the rain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted May 13, 2015 Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 I think the message is already there Lenny - I think it doesn't need to be clearer (or spelled out). There is however, a conflict in the physics, so perhaps you might rethink the first half of the refrain(the rain wants to put out the fire) You can change someIf you light your fireOr when the rain comesYou can get a little higher But I hear that thunderI hear that soundSo I'm going downTo the hallowed ground Bring the rain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mbfrancis Posted May 13, 2015 Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 Definitely. It is beginning to come into focus as a combination of resolute determination in the face of adversity and a bit of equally resolute acceptance of the inevitable....might as well bring the flood. That sounds great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 13, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 There is however' date=' a conflict in the physics[/quote'] That figures. Just when I start to feel creative.....I have to deal with physics. Ok, then, how about...... You can change some If you light your fire THEN when the rain comes You can get a little higher Hmmmmm.......can't say that I like "then and "when together like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 13, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 That sounds great. Thanks.....I am really starting to like this. It really feels good to be working with you folks again. Feels like the old days almost. So.....another important verse, maybe some subtle change to that refrain so it can be repeated.........then back to the first verse maybe with some sort of vocal over instrumentation to take this thing home. I want to have the lyrics roughed in for the weekend so I can have some fun with instrumentation.......physics be damned! *wave* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 13, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 How about for that third verse... Bring the rainAnd the rising riverBring the pain'Cause it might feel goodTo once againHave to fight to stay aliveSo bring the rainpauseBring it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted May 13, 2015 Members Share Posted May 13, 2015 I love the line "that's what we live for..." That popped out as a very nice surprise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 14, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 14, 2015 Thanks, Lee....and thanks to all of you for helping with this one so far. I sang that last verse in this morning (with a few subtle changes) and then pasted the refrain in where it repeats. I also pasted in the first verse at the end....both of those will be good place keepers now as I work up the instrumentation. It feels good to work this way again.....I have been tending to go hard on the instrumentation of late and let the lyrics come as the tracking process progresses. This is the first time in a while that I am going into tracking with this much flesh already on the bones. If anybody has any further ideas for lyrical improvement I'll be checking in as I get into tracking. *wave* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted May 22, 2015 Author Members Share Posted May 22, 2015 So.....I came on to get this one posted but have been listening to other's work instead. There is good music being done here these days. Anyway, this tune sounds like this: http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13128518 (3:18) Bring the rainAnd wash me down the riverBring the rainThen roll me in the mudBring the rainIf that's all you have to giveJust bring itBring the flood And bring change'Cause there's nothing to forgiveBring the rainAnd wash me in the blood'Cause changeIs all we have to live forBring the rainBring the flood instrumental RefrainYou can change someIf you light your fireThen when the rain comesYou've got to get a little higherBut when you hear that thunderWhen you hear that soundTake me downTo the hallowed groundAnd bring the rain Bring the rainAnd the rising riverBring the pain'Cause it might feel goodTo have to fight to stay aliveSo bring itBring the flood Refrain (repeated) Yes bring the rainIt'll wash me down the riverBring the rainIt'll be my bloodBring the rainThat's all I've got to live forBring the rainBring the flood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rhino55 Posted May 22, 2015 Members Share Posted May 22, 2015 Good work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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