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Genevieve Knows - Lyric in #48, Final mix (I think) in #85!


mbfrancis

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I almost would have cut the chorus down a bit

 

Don't know if it works for ya, but it's just a suggestion

 

Chorus:

Genevieve takes the morning train

to get to to work by nine and back again

she says it seems like no one acts their age

and that it feels like life's not lived it's waged

my love for her grows, Genevieve knows

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Great ideas. Thing is, the whole point of the stupid simple bass line was to lull you into complacency before the weird chords come in - that's the whole point, to contrast. Part of me doesn't want to touch it, dunno. There are tons of options, just trying to keep it simple...
If you do change it, you might even just use only C. Assuming here and C what you probably aren't. The tonic I mean. Then do something like what I wrote but better as the turnaround eighth note run. Simple and still the same rhythm, still the same vibe.
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I almost would have cut the chorus down a bit

 

Don't know if it works for ya, but it's just a suggestion

 

Chorus:

Genevieve takes the morning train

to get to to work by nine and back again

she says it seems like no one acts their age

and that it feels like life's not lived it's waged

my love for her grows, Genevieve knows

 

 

 

Yep - what you hear will be the second chorus, the first will be shorter.

 

"And G. knows / my love for her grows / each day / as long as she..."

 

The third might be even longer!

 

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OK, I *think* this is done. I mean, the lyrics are complete, it's about 3 minutes, it works I guess. I have to be honest, though, I just kind of wished it was better, bigger, like a chorus this big deserves better. It feels like a 60s time capsule, not a vital modern song. So...any ideas?

 

(I did this demo live, piano/vocal. I just played and sang until I made a mistake, then started again, then spliced it all together - good fun.)

 

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12922117

 

“Genevieve Knows”

 

V1

She’s like yeah,

Someone oughta follow me

and write stuff down

I’m like yeah

Every time you speak

it’s like a brand new sound

but anyone can see

I need her more than she needs me

 

CH

Genevieve takes the morning train

To get to work by nine and back again

She says it seems like no one acts their age

And that it feels like life’s not lived it’s waged

But Genevieve knows my love for her grows

Each day - as long as she calls my name

 

V2

She goes down-

town to be the empress

of her tiny scene

I go down

swinging at the sycophants

around my queen

But let them all pretend

she's gonna wake up next to them

 

CH2

Genevieve takes the morning train

To get to work by nine and back again

She says it seems like no one acts their age

And that it feels like life’s not lived it’s waged

But Genevieve knows my love for her grows

Whether she stays or whether she goes insane

As long as she calls my name

 

and every night’s a blur

but still I go to bat for her

 

CH2

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hey Martin... I bow down to your piano skills and ability to sing at the same time. This is really great... but... smiley-surprised... I'm really wanting a full production of this song... hammonds swirling, electric guitars shimmering, bass thumping... the song deserves it.

 

Or, at the very least, a Ben Folds Five fuzz bass treatment, drums, and piano at the helm... harmonies galore.

 

Love the modulation you threw in there.

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Hey Martin... I bow down to your piano skills and ability to sing at the same time. This is really great... but... smiley-surprised... I'm really wanting a full production of this song... hammonds swirling, electric guitars shimmering, bass thumping... the song deserves it.

 

Or, at the very least, a Ben Folds Five fuzz bass treatment, drums, and piano at the helm... harmonies galore.

 

Love the modulation you threw in there.

 

 

Well, it is just a demo - I'm not even sure it's done. Does it need a bridge? Does the modulation work, etc. The fact that you can *hear* the arrangement means the demo is doing it's job , no? :)

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Hi Francis,

 

This is a truly lovely song. The chorus is ace. It has this rare timeless awesomeness and yet simplicity that make great songs.And when the song is finished we say : " I wanna hear it again" Kudos !

 

Concerning the bass line I just wanted to drop you a little idea. It's in the link below. I hope this works, this is the first time I do that ^^

 

https://soundcloud.com/kazzey/idea-for-genevieve-bass-line/s-gOaFm

 

And I apologize in advance for my accent (I'm french) :0

 

Hope it helps ... cheers !

 

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Hi Francis,

 

This is a truly lovely song. The chorus is ace. It has this rare timeless awesomeness and yet simplicity that make great songs.And when the song is finished we say : " I wanna hear it again" Kudos !

 

Concerning the bass line I just wanted to drop you a little idea. It's in the link below. I hope this works, this is the first time I do that ^^

 

https://soundcloud.com/kazzey/idea-for-genevieve-bass-line/s-gOaFm

 

And I apologize in advance for my accent (I'm french) :0

 

Hope it helps ... cheers !

 

Hey Kazzey--

That's cool, your bassline (A - Bm - D - E) totally works....thanks for suggesting it. On this track I deliberately wanted to use the simplest bassline in the world (I - IV - V - IV). Yours has too many notes, ha!

 

Welcome to the board!

 

 

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Yes. I want a V3 so I can hear more! about what Genevieve says...

Yeah, that's kind of where I am a little. Not too much, just a bit more to round it off nicely.

 

The other thing that bugs me is the "whether she goes insane" which is clever but doesn't fit the rest of the song.what I'm saying in the song.

 

Finally it would be nice to restate "Genevieve Knows" somehow to reinforce the title (as someone said).

 

But I'm scared to mess it up, frankly.

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Hey Kazzey--

That's cool, your bassline (A - Bm - D - E) totally works....thanks for suggesting it. On this track I deliberately wanted to use the simplest bassline in the world (I - IV - V - IV). Yours has too many notes, ha!

 

Welcome to the board!

 

I'm happy to join ^^

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I'm happy to join ^^

 

Hey! A new guy!!! I've got to say... that is a suggestion! All recorded and performed nicely. Fantastic, Kazzey. Please feel free to stick around and help out... and ask for help... on any project posted. It's always wonderful having new and fresh perspective...

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OK I added a bridge and hopefully haven't screwed it up. I recorded this the same goofy raw way and just pasted the bridge into the middle, which is funny when I had to slow down the start of the solo to match the original tempo, whoops. I struggled with the bridge, does it work?..hopefully she's not too unsympathetic. Let me know what you think!

 

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12937860

 

 

“Genevieve Knows”

 

V1

She’s like ‘yeah,

Someone oughta follow me

and write stuff down’

I’m like ‘yeah

Every time you speak

it’s like a brand new sound’

but anyone can see

I need her more than she needs me

 

CH

Genevieve takes the morning train

To get to work by nine and back again

She says it seems like no one acts their age

And that it feels like life’s not lived it’s waged

But Genevieve knows my love for her grows

Each day - as long as she calls my name

 

V2

She goes down-

town to be the empress

of her tiny scene

I go down

swinging at the sycophants

around my queen

But let them all pretend

she's gonna wake up next to them

 

CH2

Genevieve takes the morning train

To get to work by nine and back again

She says it seems like no one acts their age

And that it feels like life’s not lived it’s waged

But Genevieve knows my love for her grows

Whether she stays or whether I go insane

As long as she calls my name

 

BRIDGE

Hey Jen, say when are you gonna let us all come up for air?

Jen says, “depends on the weather and (if) whether I’m awake enough to care”

 

and every night’s a blur

but still I go to bat for her

 

CH2

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Really good lyric and piano playing....The chorus is great...the bridge is good. The last word "care" was off a bit. Overall I like this very much. You have it crafted really good. The verses, melody wise, just lag a bit behind the chorus which is very good. I guess to me or imo the chorus is really strong and the verses not so much. The last sung word in the verse could use a directional change to get a better transition to the chorus.

 

jmo

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