Members JakeELee Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Well I'm not sure that invitations to church are meant to offend, unless the person doing the inviting implies some kind of pressure or some kind of judgement. I mean, it may just mean that someone has found something that they think is good for them, and cares enough about you to see if it interests and/or might benefit you. Depends on how you are approached with it I guess... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jcn37203 Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by lou_weed I just say in a very pleasant tone, "Y'know, I'm just not very interested in theology."Then I get a weird look and a nervous smile, and the subject turns to the weather or something. Yeah, but you live in CA. Totally different scene, trust me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members us2bslim Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Bobby, When you're in town, you can go to church with me if you want. It doesn't offend me if you say, "no thanks." More importantly, I am the last person to judge who and what you are. I've got my own problems. I think a lot of people invite folks to go to church with them because they like them and want them to be a part of what is special to them. Not too much more than that. Some of y'all are pretty funny. Some of y'all might have some issues. Some of y'all might fit into both categories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ginnboonmiller Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by MrSage Now...if you really want to get them off your back, tell them you're a Mormon and ask if they'd like to come to your church. Then clock them with a radar gun and see how fast they take off... :D See, that's the thing right there. I mean, these church inviters are making a point in the conversation to bring your religious differences into the open. There is, at that point in the conversation, no reason to apologize or be tactful about where your theology lies. It doesn't offend them or they wouldn't have brought it up. A simple "I don't believe in god, so I prefer to spend my Sunday mornings hungover" should suffice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sir H C Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 At my first job this happened to me quite often (bible belt Virginia). It would start with the subtle so what religion are you and then shift to "why don't you pray with us?" Fortunately I lived 80 miles from work and so I could say going on the weekends was not feasible. As to praying at work, using the Roman Catholic line (which I am) worked but they would still hound me claiming about how their faith blah blah blah. I said no and was a young kid so was afraid to go to the boss about it (they were not in my group anyways), but it was annoying. They didn't really want to take no for an answer. In such cases you do feel like cursing or saying you are a satanist, but I refrained. I understand this is not all christians but you got to realize such types are usually the ones going the most to get you to go to their church. Heck they come door to door in my neighborhood but I follow my rule "I don't have to answer the door just because you show up uninvited". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Thelonius Posted June 22, 2005 Author Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by JakeELee Well I'm not sure that invitations to church are meant to offend, unless the person doing the inviting implies some kind of pressure or some kind of judgement. I mean, it may just mean that someone has found something that they think is good for them, and cares enough about you to see if it interests and/or might benefit you. Depends on how you are approached with it I guess... No. They're not meant to offend at all. Which is why I asked how to politely decline. Most of the people that I would be worried about here are people who are friends that have recently started attending. Some situtations it's already happened, some it won't, and some you can feel that it's just around the corner. I may find the action to be offensive, but I certainly don't consider it to be intended that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Thelonius Posted June 22, 2005 Author Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by us2bslim Some of y'all might have some issues. Some of y'all might fit into both categories. ....actually I was hoping you'd reply. You're my spirtual adviser. And Jeremy Skrenes. But Jeremy doesn't know that. Sorry bout that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jcn37203 Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Sir H C At my first job this happened to me quite often (bible belt Virginia). It would start with the subtle so what religion are you and then shift to "why don't you pray with us?" Fortunately I lived 80 miles from work and so I could say going on the weekends was not feasible. As to praying at work, using the Roman Catholic line (which I am) worked but they would still hound me claiming about how their faith blah blah blah. I said no and was a young kid so was afraid to go to the boss about it (they were not in my group anyways), but it was annoying. They didn't really want to take no for an answer. In such cases you do feel like cursing or saying you are a satanist, but I refrained. I understand this is not all christians but you got to realize such types are usually the ones going the most to get you to go to their church.Heck they come door to door in my neighborhood but I follow my rule "I don't have to answer the door just because you show up uninvited". Man, at my first job (small company) the VP of the company was a member of this huge church, so naturally after a few months, half of the company was hired directly out of his congregation. So they started organizing bible study at lunch time in the lunch room, leading everyone in saying grace before the company barbeque. It was really annoying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jcn37203 Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Thelonius No. They're not meant to offend at all. Which is why I asked how to politely decline. Most of the people that I would be worried about here are people who are friends that have recently started attending. Some situtations it's already happened, some it won't, and some you can feel that it's just around the corner. I may find the action to be offensive, but I certainly don't consider it to be intended that way. So.... I guess I shouldn't bother asking if you want to attend my new church with me then... huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members farfignewgon Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by us2bslim Bobby, When you're in town, you can go to church with me if you want. It doesn't offend me if you say, "no thanks." More importantly, I am the last person to judge who and what you are. I've got my own problems. I think a lot of people invite folks to go to church with them because they like them and want them to be a part of what is special to them. Not too much more than that. Some of y'all are pretty funny. Some of y'all might have some issues. Some of y'all might fit into both categories. I agree. Just because they ask you to go to church with them doesn't mean they're calling you out on your beliefs or trying to degrade you in any way. They just care about you and want to share with you the hope and joy they have found. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Thelonius Posted June 22, 2005 Author Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by jcn37203 So.... I guess I shouldn't bother asking if you want to attend my new church with me then... huh? You live in Nashville. Your church should be the Ryman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mst3k Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by jcn37203 Then one day he comes in to my office and closes the door and sits down next to me and tells me the church is hosting this event with a speaker who does a question/answer session afterwards, and it's geared towards people who have lost their way or have questions about spirituality and life through Christ. Ok, now that one alone is what really sets me off. Please, if people ever want me to do something I'm already uneasy with, don't ever ask or even imply that because I don't believe what they believe that I have "lost my way" Grrrrrrrr. I can see why that bugged you jcn37203. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members us2bslim Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Thelonius ....actually I was hoping you'd reply. You're my spirtual adviser. And Jeremy Skrenes. But Jeremy doesn't know that. Sorry bout that. Wow (blushing). How totally inappropriate Just be the polite you. It will work out fine. I remember, in college I was around this pretty firebreathing group of evangilizers. In the end, it was much more about being over the top and fearless, than it was caring for the person you were talking to. A friendship is probably the most effective way to evangelize....oddly enough. If you want to help somebody to find what you have found, you do so, not to better yourself, but to care about someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members slider Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 my default answer: I tell them I am a Buddist. they are too embarrassed to ask what that is and leave sheepishly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ginnboonmiller Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by slider my default answer: I tell them I am a Buddist.they are too embarrassed to ask what that is and leave sheepishly. Are you a Buddhist? Cuz otherwise that's kind of disrespectful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gdwill2u Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by jcn37203 Man, at my first job (small company) the VP of the company was a member of this huge church, so naturally after a few months, half of the company was hired directly out of his congregation.So they started organizing bible study at lunch time in the lunch room, leading everyone in saying grace before the company barbeque. It was really annoying. As a christian I find that whole scene disgusting. Reminds me of contractors who put scriptures on their business cards or their job signs, or name the company "In His Service" or some other obvious religious referrence. It seems harmless until you think about it, they are trying to use the Lord to their advantage. Of course they would never admit that, but that is what they are doing, trying to gain an advantage my name dropping the biggest name in the universe. Jesus said His kingdom was not of this world, and I wish well meaning chrsitians would stop trying to mix the spiritual with the secular. It makes religion seem cheap, and it makes the business seem sleazy, IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members capnbringdown Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by MrSage I find it really interesting that a lot of you are advocating swearing as a way to "scare off" the person who is doing the inviting...Do you really think that all people who go to church are total squares? That they've never heard profanity before? Seriously, folks. Most modern churchgoers aren't any different from most people here.The biggest difference is that they don't sleep in on Sundays. Most of them seem quite offended by my repitive use of the word (or is it a phrase?) "god-damn." Some of those people who go to progressive churches are nuts. All the religious interventions that have been thrown for me were from that ilk. This isn't a drug problem. I didn't go on a bender and nearly kill someone. I have views that are different from theirs. You don't see liberals throwing interventions for their conservative friends. Hmm, come to think of it, that's not a bad idea. Let's find a couple of conservatives and gang up on them. You're ideas on abortion and religion are wrong! Bam! All the best music is affiliated with Satan! Pow! The government is not to be trusted! Baddaboom! We all just rot in the ground after we die! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members farfignewgon Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by capnbringdown Let's find a couple of conservatives and gang up on them. Welcome to the harmony central effects forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jcn37203 Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by gdwill2u As a christian I find that whole scene disgusting. Reminds me of contractors who put scriptures on their business cards or their job signs, or name the company "In His Service" or some other obvious religious referrence. It seems harmless until you think about it, they are trying to use the Lord to their advantage.Of course they would never admit that, but that is what they are doing, trying to gain an advantage my name dropping the biggest name in the universe.Jesus said His kingdom was not of this world, and I wish well meaning chrsitians would stop trying to mix the spiritual with the secular. It makes religion seem cheap, and it makes the business seem sleazy, IMO. I agree. Last time I was at a used car dealer, the sales manager kept a bible on his desk, and as he was giving me the sleazy used car salesmen shpeel, he kept referring to his own salvation. He told a story wherein he had recently gone in for open heart surgery, and his doctor came in and, being a christian, asked him if he (the patient) would like to join him (the doctor) in a prayer. So the patient said "sure, but lets not pray for my wellbeing, I'm saved, I know I'm in good hands if I die. Lets pray for your hands to be steady". Or something like that. I dunno, its all just so weird to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Thelonius Posted June 22, 2005 Author Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by capnbringdown Most of them seem quite offended by my repitive use of the word (or is it a phrase?) "god-damn." I've had people lose their minds when I say that too. I always point out to them that god is a pronoun, and the one they worship has a name and it does not start with 'G'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Carati Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Thelonius So what's the best way to be diplomatic? First, ask them if they have actually read the entire bible. A good 95% of christians haven't, so the next question is - "Why do YOU go to church when you don't really have a clue where the religion comes from and what it really teaches?" There are huge virtually unknown sections of the bible, that if read aloud in church, would cause the entire congregation to just get up and leave. And even the parts that are well known are not at all followed by even the most devote church goers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members farfignewgon Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Carati First, ask them if they have actually read the entire bible. A good 95% of christians haven't, so the next question is - And even the parts that are well known are not at all followed by even the most devote church goers. Really? How many Christians have you known/asked this question to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Carati Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by grunge-rock Really? How many Christians have you known/asked this question to? I was a member of a church for 20+ years and have known hundreds of em. One woman told me point blank - "Oh, we're catholic eh, we don't read the bible." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members farfignewgon Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Carati I was a member of a church for 20+ years and have known hundreds of em. One woman told me point blank - "Oh, we're catholic eh, we don't read the bible." I guess my point was to have only known hundreds of Christain's, most being catholic (i gathered that from your statement, please correct me if i'm wrong) and then state 95% of christains haven't read the whole Bible is a bit drastic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members capnbringdown Posted June 22, 2005 Members Share Posted June 22, 2005 Originally posted by Thelonius I've had people lose their minds when I say that too. I always point out to them that god is a pronoun, and the one they worship has a name and it does not start with 'G'. That seems like a pretty smart ass retort. I'll have to remember to use it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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